Guys and Other Bullshit

1) like a vampire in a trooper’s cot in his office, giving in to “decadence” and sleeping in his actual bed only when deathly ill

2) in luxury, fully nude in the finest of silk sheets that aren’t even soft

You already have some random non-functional details that are included because they look cool, which is fine, but then the illustrator for Alliances put their own spin on things and confused things even more

And then the comic book artist decided on the hideously godawful green color and rendered the sides to be clearly armored and the front/back just covered in thin fabric.

I really do hate it because

1) being Mara Jade’s armor it has nothing to do with the Chiss, their aesthetic sensibilities, or their culture

2) it does NOT follow any kind of description in the book (yes it’s form-fitting as described, but it’s sure as hell not black)

3) the ugly/non-Chiss design can’t even be excused in the name of functionality because it fails as armor. Why does it have armored pauldrons but zero armor over the chest? His tits are fully out ffs! Why does it have armor at the waist? Which would impede movement?

4) the green is gross and looks terrible on blue skin for no reason

The "fabric" IS armor. It's some sort of force-absorbing, flexible weave that disperses the force of impact. But that force has to go somewhere, so they have hard "ribs" on the sides to eat it, where an armor failure from too much force won't matter as much. The reason it looks like ribs is because it's made to allow for flexibility while still absorbing impacts. Arms/shoulders are harder to get a force-absorbing weave on because of the movement and deflection issues, so there's added pauldrons, vambraces, and padding to reinforce it, with the chest strap to help distribute their weight more effectively.

2) the uniforms are first described as black by human characters (Car’das all the way back in Outbound Flight and Anakin in Alliances specifically notes Thrawn’s uniform as being black). Also, that may have been me—I made a post referencing a bit where Thalias noted that plants on most Chiss worlds are red and purple. However, in that same little snippet, Thalias also makes note of green plants, so Chiss can see green.

You already have some random non-functional details that are included because they look cool, which is fine, but then the illustrator for Alliances put their own spin on things and confused things even more

And then the comic book artist decided on the hideously godawful green color and rendered the sides to be clearly armored and the front/back just covered in thin fabric.

I really do hate it because

1) being Mara Jade’s armor it has nothing to do with the Chiss, their aesthetic sensibilities, or their culture

2) it does NOT follow any kind of description in the book (yes it’s form-fitting as described, but it’s sure as hell not black)

3) the ugly/non-Chiss design can’t even be excused in the name of functionality because it fails as armor. Why does it have armored pauldrons but zero armor over the chest? His tits are fully out ffs! Why does it have armor at the waist? Which would impede movement?

4) the green is gross and looks terrible on blue skin for no reason

The "fabric" IS armor. It's some sort of force-absorbing, flexible weave that disperses the force of impact. But that force has to go somewhere, so they have hard "ribs" on the sides to eat it, where an armor failure from too much force won't matter as much. The reason it looks like ribs is because it's made to allow for flexibility while still absorbing impacts. Arms/shoulders are harder to get a force-absorbing weave on because of the movement and deflection issues, so there's added pauldrons, vambraces, and padding to reinforce it, with the chest strap to help distribute their weight more effectively.

2) the uniforms are first described as black by human characters (Car’das all the way back in Outbound Flight and Anakin in Alliances specifically notes Thrawn’s uniform as being black). Also, that may have been me—I made a post referencing a bit where Thalias noted that plants on most Chiss worlds are red and purple. However, in that same little snippet, Thalias also makes note of green plants, so Chiss can see green.

You already have some random non-functional details that are included because they look cool, which is fine, but then the illustrator for Alliances put their own spin on things and confused things even more

And then the comic book artist decided on the hideously godawful green color and rendered the sides to be clearly armored and the front/back just covered in thin fabric.

I really do hate it because

1) being Mara Jade’s armor it has nothing to do with the Chiss, their aesthetic sensibilities, or their culture

2) it does NOT follow any kind of description in the book (yes it’s form-fitting as described, but it’s sure as hell not black)

3) the ugly/non-Chiss design can’t even be excused in the name of functionality because it fails as armor. Why does it have armored pauldrons but zero armor over the chest? His tits are fully out ffs! Why does it have armor at the waist? Which would impede movement?

4) the green is gross and looks terrible on blue skin for no reason