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landsccape

vangoghcore

by hannahrheaume

natureell

vangoghcore

by doeeme

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twocarsandonegirl-deactivated20

unaliveish

raoul pascal

i opened my email this morning to find a message from one of our plans letting me know that my main point of contact passed away. they asked me to update their information and send them over their latest invoice. i had to just… delete this person’s name and replace it with his replacement’s name. this soulless transaction made me so sad. this theme keeps showing itself over and over again. one of my mom’s good friends retired and then two months later passed away. she didn’t even get to properly live her life. she was planning on traveling and enjoying life without work and now she’s gone.

to get through i have to keep reminding myself that i’m only here, stuck behind this desk, in this office building, staring at these computer screens, so that i can buy a house and not compare my experience to anyone else’s. playing the game to find security in the chaos.

it’s hard to acknowledge the fact that i don’t really feel like i’m living properly. it’s like i’ve been in waiting. i’ve been saying this for most of my life. what am i waiting for? why am i waiting? will i ever feel like i’m living somewhere other than in purgatory? participating in capitalism is exhausting.

#i’d rather be in the trees

greaterland

Iceland

sunsets have been incredible.

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it hasn’t rained in weeks.

whanderlost

rory mcmahon

softwaring

glowcowboy

i don’t know. i’m barely a person. i just want to be kind and hold someone’s hand. eat an ice cream cone. stare at the lake. feel the sun on my skin. lay in the grass. run through a sprinkler. it’s so easy to forget life is supposed to feel like a deep breath and not a gasp

1five1two

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you ever just drink some lemonade and eat a bunch of tacos with your best friend and then go home and put the shower on really hot so it steams up the whole room and just know that you are loved and the world isn’t so bad because she exists and everything is going to work out and be okay? because same.

mournfulroses

Edna St. Vincent Millay, from a letter featured in The Letters of Edna St. Vincent Millay

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