#1 Butch Enjoyer

“you’re allowed to relax, you know” unfortunately i cannot do that. Otherwise they will get me

hitting the weed pen in the bathroom at all you can eat sushi and reemerging for round two like a bloodied but determined boxer in the ring

Oh I’m so sleepy… won’t you use !tuck to tuck me into bed?

!cursedoak

did anyone else have terrible dreams about a gnarled, twisted forest with one tree more terrible and hateful than all the rest

early stages of friendship are Soooo embarrassing like yea sorry....... it's me again............ i enjoy talking to you and spending time with you....... you can shoot me point blank if you want i dont mind

I am a grown ass adult and I still get nausea when I feel like I'm in trouble. They're gonna send me to the principals office and take away my toys for a week. Can you just fucking kill me instead of making me stew in my fucking anxiety

faith lehane’s avoidance issues are so bad she left her own murder. buffy summers’ abandonment issues are so bad she felt abandoned by faith dropping off a building after she tried to murder faith.

hello professor i did not do the assignment because it sounded like a stupid fucking waste of time and i think you should be fired for giving this to me. maybe make the next one more interesting/relevant and i will consider it. regards

there are two punchlines here, the first is predictable, the second really surprises you