“River and I would talk about getting old, being in our 50s together, how it’d probably take us that long to get to work together. There was something gorgeous about us being old together. River will be missed — period. I mean now, more than ever I wish I could talk to him.” “I don’t really think I had really been aware of the fame that my brother had acquired, because he never carried himself as such. Our television at home had only one channel, and it was PBS. I never saw premieres, never watched Entertainment Tonight, any of that. So his celebrity was another world, And when that world was suddenly brought to our doorstep, I think it just rocked me. You just want to go through your own process of acceptance, or understanding — if there is any — without any other influences. Through all that I hadn’t seen much that was positive. I mean there certainly was an outpouring of love from a lot of people, but more than anything, there was a lot of ugliness.” “I’ve heard stuff about how the night River died he was partying and all that — it’s so untrue. That night we were together. He was just playing guitar. He wanted to show me a new song. And… I wanted to go out to see Flea play, because I’d never seen him play before. River wanted to go home, just hang out, play guitar. I was the one who wanted to go out and he was just making sure to take care of me. But some guy who claims he was best friends with River comes out — I don’t know who the fuck he is, neither does anyone else — claiming all this bullshit. That is why I’ve been reluctant to share anything.”
“I’m still… it’s very difficult to talk about it because when you lose something, someone, it’s such a great loss, you try and hold onto anything that you have, and memories that you have, and what was so difficult and what scarred me for a long time was when those memories were robbed from me. I wasn’t allowed to experience them on my own time. Other people took advantage of their access to me, and suddenly my memories were distorted and changed. So it’s very difficult, it’s hard for me to talk about it now. When you lose someone, you need to go through a really long period to try and understand what’s happened and to feel that loss in your own way. It’s more difficult if it’s a public death because it’s going to take you that much longer to try and understand what’s happened. So I dont think I can really share it with you.” “It’s tragic, because part of me wants to open up. I mean, there are things that I’d love to clear up. But at the same time, the more I state that publicly that can be taken, used and distorted, the more I add to my family’s grief and my own grief.” “I’m proud of my brother. I would never not want to be associated with him.” - Joaquin Phoenix
