lumi

My dad passed away on January 11, 2026. He was a wonderful husband and father.

Unfortunately, 5 years ago, he got liver cancer and it fell on my mother and me to ensure he got the best care he could receive. We weren't always financially well, but with his support, we were able to stay afloat even during the hardest days.

After he passed away, we were left with his debt, bills, and overdue payments. We're trying to work as hard as we can, and as much as I want to help out my mother with this, it gets really hard when I also have to attend my college classes.

It's hard, we miss him, and we just want to work things out.

I wasn't raised to ask for money or help of any kind but I understand my situation is hard and anything else. But, I still can't help but feel guilty about it !!

I can't let my mom find out... no clue how she'd react but I would rather avoid it.

I was a full-time caretaker to my father for 5 years before he passed away back in January. I miss him every day, but I have had no time to grieve this loss. My mother got a boyfriend the week we buried him, and within the week, he had moved in. My father was okay with this and encouraged the arrangement, as it would benefit us in the end. So, because I respected and understood his thoughts, I stepped back and allowed it to happen.

But I feel suffocated here.

She wants me to call him my family. She only looks out for his health and comfort. If I say anything about being displeased with this arrangement, I am the problem and selfish not to consider her happiness.

And now the financial burdens have been stacking up. I need to pay off my car that my dad left me, but I can't. My job won't schedule me due to some changes at work; I'm looking for new jobs, and I've been doing everything, even donating plasma, to try to have a little something to make payments and pay for gas for my commute to school. It's only around $5000 left to pay it off, but in my current situation, I can't keep up. Thanks to my job, I don't have to worry about tuition, which lets me breathe, but now that I have to save to move out because this living situation is very unstable, I am incredibly stressed out, and going to class is so hard when all I can think about during the lectures is if I paid everything I could...

I was supposed to graduate this year. 5 years ago I started going to school, and I felt on track for life. I could have gone out of state and taken out loans, and I would have gotten my degree by now... maybe have a better-paying job. But my father got sick, and I didn't want to leave my mother alone. So I went to community college and got my AA, but I'm only just starting to work on my bachelor's. I know I messed up choosing others over myself, but... in some way, I don't feel bad about it because I got to spend 5 good years with the man that raised me and deserved the world. But now that he's gone, I feel so overwhelmed with responsibilities that realistically should not have been mine. I was made a promise, and when it came to it, those promises weren't kept, and now I have to pay for them.