ShadowyEdgeLord

It’s 15,000 years in the future, and humanity has been wiped from the face of the earth. Aliens have discovered the planet and as they study us, one manages to activate a computer server. All it contains is a complete archive of Tumblr.

“Huh. Shame we didn’t get here while they were still alive. Seems like everyone on this planet really, really wanted to fuck an alien.”

Galactic wars are always won by whoever finds the other first – there is simply no way to retaliate fast enough to a carpet bombing from a high orbit. Other civilizations are absolutely terrified of Terrans who are cocky enough to broadcast their presence loud and clear.

You are a superhero who works tirelessly for an ungrateful city. One day after another long day you get a knock at your door. It is the city’s supervillain and he brought a bottle for you two to share.

you are out with a friend when suddenly you blink and everything around you looks ruined and everyone looks like statues. A frail old man looks at you and weeps while he says “After 84 years, I finally was able to wake someone up”

You have existed since the dawn of humanity. In a way, at least. Once a simple tribesman, you were cursed so that whenever you are killed by another person, you leave your dead body and become your killer. You fear death by natural causes, as that will end your life for good.