quite literally a shadow

i have a more restrictive music taste than host and the other parts. a circle mostly within a circle on a venn diagram. i think in words a little more than the others. i feel the need to write with my hands but also to Post TM. i feel i/we have a good filter for what to put where at this point. when i gave negative fucks about everything it was easy to just wildly overshare online and then torture us with others’ responses. now i just give zero fucks. some here and there about our dogs and partner and family but that’s kind of it. i’m irritable and anxious and easily overwhelmed. we can mask well enough at work but even in class sometimes i struggle to hide my feelings. i’m a little bit puerile. probably because im literally the shadow of our 14-18 y/o self. i kinda topped off at 18 and disappeared a little. it’s kinda what i do best.

im kind of just defined by being depressed but i also enjoy art and music. im actually a little bit of an introject of natewantstobattle (specifically "natemare" because every youtuber Needed a dark alter ego in 2015-16 ig) and i really enjoy his work among others. some faves are secrets / myka, relocate / motionless in white / dangerkids / the used / a day to remember / bring me the horizon / machine head / falling in reverse unfortunately / cardinal / the funeral portrait