BARDLIFE 4 EVER @semisomni - Tumblr Blog

Fuck Meyer-Briggs whatever typology. This INTFP shit is only for redditors up their own asses to substitute for a personality. Use my new typology instead!

Your ideal environment is:

Hot/Cold

Wet/Dry

Bright/Dark

Loud/Quiet

bedupolker

HWBL - beach boy

HWBQ - tropical fish

HWDL - dingy club bathroom hookup

HWDQ - the swamp woman

HDBL - CoachellaBurningmanSouthbysouthwestACL attendee

HDBQ - Lizard

HDDL - Vegas babeyyyy

HDDQ - Trapped in a slot canyon

CWBL - Rowdy Lobsterman Crew

CWBQ - penguin living

CWDL - port angeles basement show

CWDQ - bruminating amphibian/hypothermic mammal

CDBL - ski resort

CDBQ - Christmas in Nebraska

CDDL - mcmurdo station rave

CDDQ - corpse

#LIZARD BABEYYYYY

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stedesparasol

OFMD(ish) EMOJI ASSOCIATION ↳ @bizarrelittlemew sent: 🐆🐎🐎🪦 [template]

#funniest scene in the show i think #LOVE this rendition of it :')

WHO'S DROPPING THEIR ELBOW. NOT ME!!!

#Raranya ranya

i'm so unwell

#raranya ranya

cinema.....

#raranya ranya

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she's gonna beat exactly a 100 guys in a bar fight

#raranya ranya

stedesparasol

favourite bitchy stede moments

OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH (2022-2023)

#he's so silleeeeyyyy #<3 #ofmd

beyondtheyote

however far away, i will always love you, however long i stay, i will always love you

#oh that caption with this makes me unwell #anyway GORGEOUS i love this style for themm #ffxiv

normalmammal

it’s sooo hard showing someone black sails for the first time and they (correctly) think flint is a huge asshole and you can’t tell them that he’s allowed to do all that because he’s gay

The cat distribution system appears determined to single me out

#today is the second day this week a cat has randomly walked into our appartment #And if i understand correctly it was actually TWO cats today. One of which i entirely failed to notice #The other appeared in our livingroom seemingly out of thin air while i was frantically searching for it in the other rooms #as our neighbour stood in the doorway going yeah i think he should be in here-oh yeah there he is! Here coño!#Yes that appears to have been the cats name which is hilarious to me #short and sociable woman i have never seen before: i love your vibe and your cat who is apparently bitey #Sure am glad i didnt try to pick him up knowing that now XD

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stupidestasshole

what if it was called magic the slathering and it was about lotions and ointments

#I would not enjoy that very much!

IM LAUGHING SO HARD OUR PHOTOGRAPHER LEGIT PHOTOSHOPPED THE BOUQUET THAT I FORGOT INTO MY HANDS IN ONE OF THE CEREMONY PICTURES. i was actually holding the little booklet in my hands at the time, ROLLED UP in my nervous fidgeting, so it's like the universe conspiring to be like, NO WORRIES WE CAN FIX THIS LMAOOOOOOO

#this is the funniest thing thats ever happened #I love these people hshdhfjdjhfjdjdn

xxbroken-butterflyxx

#IT'S HER #bg3

spacemancharisma

nominally speaking, is this a cake?

yeah

no, you gotta call it something else (leave ideas in tags)

Voting ended onJun 23

#I would say yes though i def understand calling it a trifle...blurring the lines i guess #Regardless i am SUPER curious what this tastes like. It seems crazy to me but i've had all sorts of crazy desserts #so even though i dont THINK it would be good my curiosity is killing me lol. gimme the weird matcha cake trifle #I need ittttt

today i learned two things:

I am the least observant motherfucker on the planet. its actually impressive. if i dont get some sort of situational/environmental/spatial awareness soon i think i might actually die.

One hour is TOO SHORT for karaoke. One hour is nothing. I blinked twice and it was over. I was also hogging on of the two microphones basically all of the time because if you give me a microphone and put on songs that i know you simply cannot expect me to relinquish it. thats just how it is sorry i dont make the rules.

#in my defense i'd never done proper karaoke before. i had to go hogwild there was simply no other choice

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I cant believe they fucking GOT ME with the surprise bachelorette party oh my god this is the dumbest thing thats ever happened to me (appreciative).

"i need to shop for some more stuff for the wedding and i need your opinion so im coming to your appartment on sunday and we'll go into the city ok?" "Oh sure :)" [i wonder what it is my mother needs? Oh well i guess i'll find out]

*one hour before the visit* "Oh your mother in law is coming with me on this visit thats fine right?" uh sure [oh god are they staging an intervention. is this about our lack of cleaning again] [quick lemme do some chores oh god oh god help]

"yeah we stayed up pretty late last night talking so some coffee would be nice haha!" "Of course! I too played final fantasy too late last night so i totally understand. I sure hope my partner isnt too tired today because he also was gaming and its his surprise bachelor party today teehee! Yeah they had a group chat they called the big [redacted] kidnapping isnt that funny!" [clueless]

"lets see where was that parking garage again..." [me, thinking to myself: huh my mother in law seems to know exactly where shes going. I wonder what sort of crazy purchase shes intending to make here that requires us to go specifically here in the centre of my city]

"Oh hey! Look at that! It's [redacted]! Thats crazy what a coincidence that she would also be here today of all days haha! Waow! Guess we'll group up in that case haha!!" "Huh! So youre also here on a shopping trip?" [Her, smiling nervously] "haha....yep.....definitely.....thats what im doing...."

"Im hungry. Lets go get some lunch before we do anything else. Cmon Lianne lets walk over here to find a bakery and get some sandwiches or something. nono dont worry about the others theyll just be waiting over there :) "

[we walk back carrying croissants]

[to my utter bafflement, when we return, my two friends from uni have miraculously appeared. they both look nice. one of them is dressed kinda like a pirate, almost in the style of.....almost like....]

"Omg hey! Thats crazy! Did you know we also coincidentally just.... Wait. Wait a second."

[My head whips comically back and forth between assorted unexpected guests, all of whom are looking distinctly smug]

...

....

.........."WAAAAAAAAAIT A FUCKING SECOND"

#IVE BEEN HAD. BAMBOOZLED. FLUMMOXED.

teehee

#Raranya ranya

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