We just cannot with this today

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@selfdoubter
We just cannot with this today

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Holy FUCK!
For the love of all things unholy
Hiya! I’m re-posting Evermore! Here’s chapter 1 <3
On ao3⬇️
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Or if you’d rather read it here ⬇️
Evermore
Chapter 1: Falling Leaves
—-
Today was the day, you walked down the hall and into the grooms suite. You found Al pacing around and shaking.
“Alan! What’s the matter?” You asked
“I think I’m going to be sick” he said
“You’ll be alright, man. You’ve been planning this 1 day for an entire year!” You rubbed his shoulders.
“What if I forget my vows? What if I drop her ring?” He was rambling
“Breathe.” You grabbed his shoulders, “It’s going to work out. This is normal wedding nerves.”
He started to breathe slower, he pulled you into a tight hug.
“I don’t know what I’d do without you, Kale.” He sighed
You laughed, “You’d be only half of yourself.” You patted his back.
You helped him straighten his tie, you went over his suit with a lint roller once again. The rest of the groomsmen came into the room a little later.
“Hey guys!” You greeted everyone
“KALE!” Your cousin shouted running up to you
You caught him in a big hug,
“Hey loser, how are you?” You asked
“I’m good! How are you? Is your girlfriend here?” He smiled
“She is! She’s with Rina in the bridal suite right now, you’ll meet her later!” You gushed
“We’ve heard so much about her from your mom, she adores Larissa.”
“I know she does, mom has come a long way in a year.” You tilted your head to look at Al who looked green.
You excused yourself from your cousin and went over to Al.
“Remember what we talked about, breath through it” you reminded
“I’m trying, I’m just so scared. I cannot mess this up, Sib” he said shakily
“And you won’t,” you adjusted his shoulders, “Where’s that cocky Al confidence I grew up dealing with?” You asked
The door to the suite opened and you heard Larissa’s voice float in from the main room, Al nodded for you to go. You walked out and stopped, Larissa looked beautiful. She wore a floor length off the shoulder terracotta colored dress, her hair was loose over her shoulders with subtle make up.
“Honey?” She said
“Holy shit” it slipped out
She laughed and walked over to you, “Hi there”
“Riss, you look…wow” you sighed
“I could say the same about you, all fancied up” she smiled
You didn’t wear suits much. You are Al’s best “man” though so it couldn’t be helped. You were dressed to the 9’s in a sage green suit, terracotta vest and tie with loafers.
“Alan is so nervous” you giggled
“So is Catarina, she’s been pacing for hours. Not even the champagne helps.” She said
“They’re going to do amazing, I hope I’m not this nervous when we get married.” The last part happened before you could stop it.
“What?” She looked at you
“Nothing!” You spun around and looked back, “I’ll see you at the ceremony!”
You walked Al out to the balcony for some fresh air. You opened the doors and the cool autumn air floated in. You loved everything about October and so did he. You two always had the most fun when it was starting to get near Halloween time. You handed him a glass of champagne and motioned for him to drink it.
“Maybe it’ll relax you, maybe it’ll make the nerves worse.” You said
“That’s..not comforting” he laughed and drank it anyway.
You walked back inside to get the stuff from your brief case you brought with you. Alan followed behind you. You knelt down and popped it open, pulling out 2 hand made handfasting cords. You turned and showed them to him, tears welled in his eyes.
“Thank you for making these, Kale” he hugged you
“Joy on thy fair handfasting day, brother.” You smiled wrapping your arms around him.
You pulled your phone out to check it, you saw a text from Rina
Rina: Kale can you come over here?
Kale: Be right there, Rin
You told Alan that you needed to go see Rina for a moment, she had requested your presence for something. He waved you off and out the door you went. You walked quickly, arriving at the door and knocking. Larissa opened the door,
“She’s in here, she’s been asking for you.” She said walking in
You followed and stopped at the door way when Rina came into your view, she looked beautiful. You hadn’t seen her dress yet, it fit her perfectly.
“You asked for me?” You said
She turned and ran to you,
“I’m so glad you’re here! Can you help me with this?” She asked walking into the room
You followed and waited to see what she needed help with, she pulled out her vows and handed them to you
“Tell me these don’t suck.”
You read over them carefully, you’d worked with her on these for months.
“Rina these are gorgeous, they have been. What’s got you so nervous?” You asked
“What if he hates them?” She started to cry
Larissa came into the room and stopped at your side
“Rina, hey, they don’t suck. These are beautiful. He’s going to cry. I promise.” You reassured her.
She looked at you and then to Larissa and smiled,
“You know, someday these roles will be reversed.”
Larissa looked at you, you looked at Rina and she was smiling like she’d thrown bait into shark infested waters.
You smiled at Rina sweetly and then gave her the motion to meet you in the room. You told Larissa you’d be right back. You walked into the room and closed the door,
“What is with you?” You asked
“You act like it’s not coming” she said
“I have the ring, I don’t have a plan!” You raised your voice slightly, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I just don’t want to scare her away.”
“You won’t, if anything she’s probably planning something too.” She said hugging you
“How’s Al?” She asked
“A nervous wreck.” You laughed
“I’m the same, I’m so ready to get this over with” she sighed
“It’ll be over before you know it, sis.” You reassured
“I can’t believe this is actually happening, this feels unreal.” She said
“You didn’t think you’d ever get married?”
“No I did, I just didn’t know it would be with someone as amazing as him.” She blushed
You laughed, “he’s pretty cool I guess, but I should be getting back. He’s going to wonder if you’ve stolen me.”
She laughed and walked you out,
“You look beautiful, Rina.” You said
“Thank you, Kale” she blew you a kiss
—————————-
Guests started to fill the courtyard, you looked around and saw your mom. You waved and she came over,
“Look at you! You look incredible!” She beamed
“Thanks, mom. Have you seen Riss?” You asked
“She’s getting ready to walk in. Aren’t you walking with her?”
“I am, are they lined already?” You checked your watch
“They are! Get going!”
You walked over to the door and took your place next to Larissa, linking arms.
“You’re late” she whispered
“Forgive me, Al was freaking out.” You whispered back.
You all stood to the side as Alan walked through, he opened the doors and walked in. You looked at Larissa and smiled brightly, touching her hand.
Alan had chosen the Lord of the Rings theme for himself and you all to walk in to, as soon as the music swelled you were signaled to start going in. Your heart was hammering in your ears, you’d never been surrounded by this many well dressed people in your life. You kept reminding yourself not to trip, you parted with Larissa and stood next to your brother watching as the others walked in.
Eventually when you all were in place, the theme switched and you looked up, seeing Rina and her dad in the doorway. They started forward and you looked at Alan, who was crying. You saw Rina tear up when they made it to the front. She hugged her dad and stepped in front of Alan.
You stepped forward and took the cords from around your neck, you laced them around their joined hands, you sang:
Fly we on o'er hill and dale
Spruces guard our fairytale
Hemlock branches bless and stay
Upon my lovely's wedding day
Joy on thy fair handfasting day!
Tide will roll and bridge stand fast
Eagles watch and breezes pass
Ebb and flow whilst ravens play
Upon my brother's wedding day
Joy on thy fair handfasting day!
You stepped back, smiled at them both and took your place back at your brother’s side while the officiant spoke.
“Dearly beloved, we’re grateful to gather here today to celebrate Alan and Catarina as they take the next big step in their lives together, the adventure of marriage! Each of you are a part of Alan and Catarina’s story. You are part of the unknowable magic that brings us here today, and that binds these two bright souls in spirit. Whether you met them long ago or recently, as family or friend, your presence and support is a gift to them. Thank you for being here!
As we get started, let’s pause for a moment and picture our favorite memory with these two. Now take a look at them here today, isn’t this wonderful? How far they’ve come, and how far their love will take them. All the beautiful memories they'll make in the years to come.”
You listened as the officiant, your uncle, blessed the Altar and called on the spirits of the surrounding Forrest.
"On the table beside you are the four elements. Symbols of earth, air, water, and fire. They are the foundations of life, symbolizing a bridge between the physical world and the spirit realm. Like all powerful things, these elements must remain balanced and in harmony with each other to thrive. No one element should overpower the others, though each may lead at times. We ask for their blessings.”
You looked around, taking in the scenery of everything, the fairy lights hanging from the trees. The greenery spread across the arch you all stood under. You took notice of the incense that were burning and the smell they gave off.
You picked up the incense that was burning next to you and handed it to your uncle, smiling
“May this bless you with a sharp mind, imagination, and endless wonder” he stated as he circled them in the smoke and placing it behind him.
Your youngest cousin came forward with the rings, he handed them to his father and sat back down.
“Now, Alan, Rina, it is time to exchange the vows you’ve written along with your rings.”
You watched Alan swallow, he pulled the paper out of his pocket with shaking hands and started.
“Catarina, I will honor and respect you and never seek to break that honor. I will share your pain and seek to ease it. I will share the burdens your spirit carries so that we may grow within this union. I vow to share your laughter and always look for the brightness within you. I make these vows until my last day in this earth.”
He placed the ring on her finger, wiping his eyes.
Everyone else was crying with him, even Larissa.
Rina took a breath, grabbing Al’s ring out of the box and holding it to him
“Alan, I vow to seek passion and strength within this union. I will offer mutual support and an abundance of my love and life. I vow to devote myself to your soul, so that I may grow with you in this union. I offer myself as your grounding, home and security. May our souls find home within each other for many more years. I say these as they are true until my last day on this earth.”
With shaking hands she placed the ring on his finger and looked at him through tears.
“May you always be blessed with walls for the winds, a roof for the rain, tea beside the fire, laughter to cheer you, those you love near you, and all your heart might desire.”
He held up their hands
“Slainte mhor agus a h-uile beannachd duibh,”
With that, Alan leaned in and kissed Rina for the first time as a married couple. The space erupted in applause and screaming. You looked over at Larissa and smiled. As they headed down the aisle you followed arm in arm with Larissa.
——————————
You grabbed your wine glass and found Larissa walking in with your mom, you walked over to them
“Hello ladies” you said
“Hello there, my child!” Your mom beamed, “The handfast was beautiful wasn’t it?”
You nodded, “It was gorgeous, dad would’ve loved it.” You said looking down
“You did amazing, my love” Larissa chimed in, kissing your cheek.
“Thank you, I haven’t been in something like that in a very long time.” You smiled
The doors to the venue opened and in walked Al and Rina hand in hand. Everyone cheered, going to give them hugs and to take pictures. Alan came over to you and pointed to the camera, you smiled brightly. Once the camera had moved on, he looked to you,
“Thank you for making that go so smoothly, Kale. It was so much easier with you doing half of it. Not that Uncle Kramer isn’t great though.” He shrugged
“I get what you mean, it helps when your twin is right there. I hope you’d do the same for me” you said
“I would and I will” he said looking at Larissa.
Larissa quickly looked down, the floor was very interesting suddenly. You saw a blush paint her cheeks under her make up. You cleared your throat,
“I know, that’s far in the future though.” You laughed.
“Whatever you say. I’m going to go catch my wife. That’s so weird to say. MY WIFE!” He said giddily
You walked over to Larissa and met her eyes,
“What’re you thinking about right now?” You asked
“Everyone sure is keen on us getting married, aren’t they?” She asked
“I guess so, they’ve pretty much decided you’re already family anyway.” You winked
“It feels silly to blush over something like this at 43” she whispered
“Get used to it, because it’ll keep happening for forever…probably.” You tried to play it off.
Across the room you saw Raines and Sydney talking, you’d hoped they were having a good time. You made a note to check on them later. Raines had been having a hard time since Viv’s sudden passing about 6 months ago.
“I’m surprised she showed up” Larissa said
“Me too, she’s been at work but I didn’t think she’d stick to a social commitment so soon. She’s a different type of strong willed.” You spoke softly.
By the time cocktail hour wore down, everyone was ready for food and to sit down. You and Larissa found your places at the head table, although they’d sat you two together. The food started to come out and you walked to the bar and got yourself and Larissa a drink.
You walked back to the table,
“A dry red for the lady, and a jack and coke for the…person?” You snorted
Larissa also snorted
Your mom looked over and laughed,
“That was weird, Kale.” She continued to laugh
“I was trying to be smooth but I guess at 31 those days are long gone.” You chuckled and took your seat.
Your plate was placed in front of you. A beautiful piece of salmon with a lemon and dill sauce, mashed potatoes and roasted broccolini. Your eyes grew at the size of it. You looked at Larissa who looked just as shocked. Everyone started to eat and talking amongst their own tables.
“Kale” your cousin Jace started, “How long have you and Larissa been together.”
“A year and some change” you answered between bites.
“So you’re saying that eventually we’ll get to see you again right?” He asked
“What do you mean?”
“In this setting.” He said
“Yes, eventually. You’ve got awhile. Don’t get your hopes up.” You smiled
You heard Larissa and your mom talking beside you,
“How is Kale doing?” Your mom asked
“They’re good! I don’t know if they told you yet but we live in the same quarters now and have for about a month.” She informed your mom
“That’s wonderful! They did not tell me, who moved where?”
“They moved with me, mine was bigger because of where it’s at in the building, it’s been good to keep my eye on them.” She laughed quietly
“Trouble maker?” Your mom raised an eyebrow
“Oh yes, completely the chaos boss. Those poems cause riots.” She joked
Your mom laughed and you looked over,
“What’s funny?” You looked between them
“Nothing, chaos coordinator” Larissa teased
You pointed at yourself, “are you sure you’re talking about me?” You laughed.
After dinner was over, the father daughter dance and the mother son dances happened. Alan held your mom’s hand and lead her out. You watched them, you knew how much Al had missed your mom when the fighting was happening. It made your heart swell to see them together again. You hoped maybe at your own ceremony she would do this with you too. You were holding Larissa’s hand, she drew lazy circles on your knuckles with her thumb. You had leaned back against her.
Alan and Rina had chosen to forego speeches, neither of them was too interested in being embarrassed publicly like that, you didn’t blame them. Once the dances were over they headed back to the table and Rina stopped next to you,
“You guys ready?” She asked
“For what?” You gave her a puzzled look
“To dance! Duh!” She clapped
“I’m going to need more alcohol in my system” you said getting up and walking to the bar
You ordered another drink for you and for Larissa who was coming up behind you.
Rina was watching you two from the table, she leaned over to Alan
“Their time is coming. Look at them!” She whispered
“I know, Kale has had the ring for 4 months.” He whispered back.
“I’ll never get over their height difference, it’s what Kale deserves.” She giggled
Alan laughed as he watched you two sway back and forth while you waited.
The night passed in a blur of dancing, drinks, snacks and good company. By the time 11pm rolled around you were exhausted and so was everyone else. Your mom had stayed sober so that she could take you and Larissa back to Nevermore.
You got back and took the suit off immediately, you’d felt stuffy all day and wanted the freedom to breathe without your vest on. Larissa walked in from her shower, you walked up to her.
“Thank you for dealing with everyone today, the falling leaves and most of all, my cousins asking too many questions.” You wrapped your arms around her.
“I’ll do it for the rest of my life, Kale Riley.” She kissed you softly.
“You truly are the light of my life, Larissa.”
“Let’s go to bed, tomorrow is an early day, it’s farmers market day.” She kissed you again.
You got into bed and curled up against her, you drew lazy circles on her collar bones. You could barely keep your eyes open.
“Goodnight…person” she giggled
“Goodnight, mi’lady” you giggled back.
Aahhhh, this is so go!
Signs your romance subplot has absolutely no tension (sry)
♡ they meet and immediately like each other (goodbye conflict, we barely knew you)
♡ the only thing keeping them apart is a misunderstanding that one conversation would fix
♡ both characters describe the other as "beautiful" within three pages of meeting
♡ their chemistry is told not shown (the narrator insists they have spark. they don't.)
♡ the love interest has no personality outside of loving the protagonist
♡ they argue once, make up immediately, never argue again
♡ obstacles are external. they always agree with each other about everything.
♡ the rival love interest exists for two chapters then vanishes without explanation
♡ they almost kiss. something interrupts. this happens four times. on the fifth time they kiss. the end.
♡ the love interest is described as funny, clever, and kind. we see none of this.
♡ their big emotional moment is in the rain. it is always in the rain.
♡ the breakup lasts exactly one chapter before they reconcile
♡ "i've never felt this way before" said by someone with no prior emotional history
♡ both confess feelings at the same time. no awkwardness. no stakes. just synchronized emotion.
♡ their first kiss is perfect. no bumped noses. no wrong angle. cinematic and frictionless.
♡ jealousy subplot introduced and dropped without consequence
♡ they have one shared interest and it is the plot
♡ trauma bonding mistaken for romantic chemistry (these are different things)
♡ the side characters ship them loudly. this is not a substitute for actual tension.
♡ one of them dies temporarily. other is devastated. they come back. no lasting emotional damage.
♡ they end up together because the plot ends, not because they chose each other
♡ epilogue: married with children. every loose end tied. nothing left to feel.
Small human things that make a character feel real !!
☽ checking your phone and not registering the time. checking it again. still nothing. putting it away anyway
☽ the half-smile you do when you're trying not to cry in public
☽ looking at your hands during a hard conversation instead of the person
☽ laughing at something right after you say it like you surprised yourself
☽ going to say something and then deciding not to and the moment is gone and it's too late and you think about it for three days
☽ the way you hold your breath without knowing when something's loading
☽ saying "no yeah totally" when you absolutely did not follow what they said
☽ the very specific tired where you're staring at a wall and your face just. stops doing things
☽ nodding while on the phone even though they cannot see you
☽ the tiny pause before you say someone's name for the first time

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Nothing Sharper Than A Hairpin (Part 5)
Read on AO3
Part 1 — Part 2 — Part 3 — Part 4 — Part 5
Words: 10,095
Pairing: Brienne of Tarth x fem!reader
Characters: Brienne of Tarth, original male character, Sansa Stark, mentions of Podrick, Ser Davos and other GoT characters
Summary: You are the sole heir of House Malloren, betrothed to a cruel lord for your family's convenience, and come to Sansa Stark to pledge troops for the upcoming war in your father's name. When a first attempt is made on your life for a reason yet unknown, Brienne is appointed as your sworn shield. Tensions rise, the assassination attempts grow more frequent, and you can't help but get closer to Brienne until your feelings for her become as much of a threat as the arrows directed at your head.
Tags: slow burn, angst, hurt/comfort, pining, eventual smut (NSFW/minors DNI), canon divergence and inaccuracies
Trigger warnings: violence, murder attempt, graphic smut (NSFW/minors DNI)
Please take as long as you need to reply
Please come talk to me about headcanons, ships and plots
Please introduce me to all your characters
Please never be afraid to start new things with me (even if we already have 1000)
Please leave endless amounts of memes and all kinds of random stuff in my inbox
Please IM me about things that happen in your life
Please feel free to be yourself
Please HAVE FUN
a one season television show is also a dead wife if you think about it
You love it dearly but it was gone too soon
Dear diary...
A new day means a bunch of new regrets for me.

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when my special interest is in fact larissa weems and people try to clock me but it simply does not work
It will never work that woman was sent from the gods
Pamela Rabe | hands appreciation post | 3 of ?
Joan Ferguson in Wentworth | #rabehands
Her nails are ALWAYS immaculate
Why do they do this to us 😭
Why?! Gods why?! In the middle of reading a fic and AO3 crashes.
How is she so perfect all the time

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
whoever made this is my hero istg ⋮ LESBIANISM
Pamela Rabe as Joan Ferguson in Wentworth (S8, 2020) | promos