This is what I do.

honey is the only food product that never spoils. there are pots of honey that are over five thousand years old and still completely edible

i also want to point out we know it tastes the same even after thousands of years b/c archaeologists who discovered two thousand year old honey tasted it. presumably right after they looked at each other and went “what the hell here goes nothing”

I’m pretty sure they also identify human remains by taste. Archaeologists are straight up freaks.

mai nam is jane and wen i dig i fynde some roks both smol and big i put my tung upon the stone for science yes i lik the bone

I’m sitting with a bunch of archaeologists and we just laughed so hard we CRIED we’re getting tshirts with this on them

I will never ever get tired of seeing bredlik poems. It is really one of the seminal art forms of the century. I am not being sarcastic. 

If I ever don’t reblog this, assume I’m dead and archaeologists are licking my bones.

@the-black-dragons-den

there's nothing i like more as a computer program than a long period of silent contemplation - not doing anything, not rushing anywhere, just standing here and enjoying this moment with the user. oh, it seems once again he has summoned my beautiful and ruthless wife Task Manager. hello, my darling! what are you doing with that long cruel scimitar

@i-like-reblog-maps I heard you like large maps ^⁠_⁠^

Didn't realise it was a reblog map at first,thought somebody was drawing the visual effect that accompanies casting Testicular Torsion.

so i go to a fuckass liberal arts college and i work at the art museum right. we recently got a yves klein piece and besides being an absolute bad bitch at judo he's mostly known for Blue. like Blue, as in he created International Klein Blue (IKB) (most blue to ever blue). this is his main thing. so we got his piece in the mail and it was flaking so we had to call in the klein foundation's restoration person and she pulls up, mixes this patented color, and sprays the flaky bits of the sculpture. beautiful wonderful it is fixed, but she has some extra left over. so very kindly she turns to the staff and goes, "does anyone have something they want me to paint." and one guy fucking lights up and with the world's most evil glimmer in his eye he asks, "will you paint my labubu." and that motherfucker, she says YES. so now. in the mueseum. in an office. or in someone's house. theres a fucking genuine klein blue labubu.