⚖️♁

this is like scrooge seeing his own grave in a christmas carol

ur not ugly, u have poor self-esteem

u didnt grow up ugly, u were taught to judge urself

other ppl arent ugly, ur projecting ur learned insecurities onto them

Start your high fantasy game in a tavern. End it in a tavern. The whole game takes place in a tavern.

The owners of the tavern would like to thank you for supporting a local business and for defeating the lich in their bathroom.

Paladin™: when you’re kinda feeling cleric but also want to Stab

Sorcerer™: when you wanna be a caster but you don’t wanna be a nerd

Bard™: when you’ve never made a decision in your life and you don’t intend to start now

Warlock™: when you’re not quite ready to admit you’re into cryptids like that

Druid™: when honestly you’d rather be on the floor petting the DM’s cat but they made you play and this is the next best thing you guess

Fighter™: when all the weird puzzle shit bores the snot out of you and you’d rather stack dice til the fighting part gets here

Rogue™: when you’ve never solved a problem in your life, and in fact have caused many, and you’re just fine with that honestly

Cleric™: when your friends are a gaggle of idiots with a deathwish and you’re the only person who’s capable of saving them from themselves

Ranger™: when the druid has the right general idea but is just a bit too friendly and outgoing and trusting for your tastes

Because gay people are dirty and erotic and disgusting and drawing them is sinful and shameful and naughty.

not all heros wear capes

it's 2022. donald trump has died in disgrace days after being impeached and jailed. my chemical romance's new album is coming out the same day as the new spiderverse movie. the lizzo and janelle monaé collab song is blowing up the radio. lil nas x has a verse in it. you and your partner have time and energy for dates after work after jeff bezos' assets have been seized and distributed to the public in the wake of his arrest for keeping employees in unsafe working conditions.

oh what a life

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