searching, but not very hard

to this day i can't believe bridget jones queerbaited us with a possible throuple. the throuple was right there. i didn't invent the throuple.

the hotel manager from pretty woman is a saint. if it happened to me? if cynical mogul richard gere serenaded strangers on the bar piano in his shirtsleeves and waistcoat. only to send everyone away and get fluids all over that sweet steinway with sex worker julia roberts? i'd freak. i'd go nuts. julia roberts gets a pass but richard gere knows how much that thing costs. that's literally a public performance instrument. also that guy probably left his guitar there and has to loiter around while they get busy because richard gere is richer than midas. i hope they deep cleaned it real good.

whenever submittable's no fee selection leads someone to nearly submit smething that needs a fee after all a little fairy dies in fairyland

whatever au where ned survives king's landing would automatically make him the GOAT. not because he survived king's landing and the fall of robert's reign so much as because winter IS coming. winter is here. the undead are rising in masse and their overlords want to devour the world, and lord stark and the wolf-headed cane catelyn orders for him are ON IT. forget king of the north, he's taking his forces and staying in the north. lord stark is traumatized and guilty about not going to stannis' aid and extremely stressed, but the level of quiet, grim satisfaction and sense of purpose the others being a thing would bring him? unmatched. winter IS coming!! the lannistes' game of thrones is less than anything in the face of that. lord commander mormont is getting funds he didn't even think to request. that castle black spreadsheet inventory game is about to go on a whole other level now that lord stark is investing. and lord stark is invested. lord stark's last and youngest sibling has been eaten by the encroaching night and his king and friend is dead and he is dealing with this by making a whole bunch of people pissed off about his new policy for urgent apocalypse taxes. he's got the greatjon hugely pissed off about the wildlings but then he is also psyched against fighting against the end of the world so it evens out. the manderleys got a green light to build a flotilla against hypothetical zombies that might or might not freeze the sea, and they smile and bow and say that they are happy to do it but they do need some logistical help, and this is how catelyn stark negotiates the great riverlands-northern maritime treaty. ned is so down bad for her. ned is living vertiginously and his sleep his terrible and the chronic pain is terrible but he is so down bad for her. it's catelyn's idea to send karstark and his sons to negotiate with the iron islands. it's catelyn who writes the replies to stannis and her sister and her father and who mentions the idea of robb marrying shireen and shireen's beautiful dowry of dragonglass. but all the same, lord stark is not waiting for orders from his unlikable king. what he is doing is sending roose bolton to the wall to man empty keeps and have fun torturing wights in productive fashion. bolton is locked in, sure, but lord stark is the most locked in anyone has ever been. he is aura farming at mac capacity. at night he curls up around catelyn and buries his face in her hair while she strokes his neck. the sex has never been better. catelyn and him show up to meet with mance ryder and val and the sexual tension is palpable. songs will be sung about the foursome-that-never-was and the wildling truce. meanwhile jon snow is fielding nepo favoritism accusations and catching a thousand stray bullets but then what's new.