O, be swift — we have always known you wanted us.

only hayley williams understands me.

dragged my sodden heart up to the isle of skye, got windswept & rainsoaked in fields further north than i've been in years. there is peat & oil & earth in my blood; i am reminded of this every time i come out into the wilds of scotland. fuck him fuck him fuck him. i keep thinking, unbidden, of the shakespearean insult: you lily-livered cur, you milk-sopped pansy. i think also of maisie peters: women's hearts are lethal weapons, did you hold mine & feel threatened? still, still. i have books to write, lessons to teach, friends to adore. "i can't believe anyone could break up with you", he said. me too, fucker. me too.

got a good grade in dining at kitchen table at the three chimneys on skye, something that is normal to want & possible to achieve