Miscommunication Sentence Starters
aka “fuck i completely missed what you were trying to get at”
“Wait, you meant hang out at seven in the morning?”
“I never said I was coming over.”
“I said I was going to get the pizza and you get the chips, but now we have an extra pizza because apparently you heard me wrong.”
“What? You told me you love me? When?”
“So, I hired this guy to put a ton of flowers around the door, but he got the address wrong.”
“Why didn’t you say you were afraid of this?”
“I thought you were being serious when you asked me to kiss you.”
“Okay, you need to work on hand gestures, because you looked like you were telling me to go meet you in a closet.”
“Alright, judging by your clothes I misunderstood the occasion.”
“Any reason you brought flowers?”
“Wait, what do you mean that test you needed me to drive you to is today?”
“Not sure how this happened, but my mom thinks I’m dating you.”
“I thought that was you gesturing for me to help you get away from that person.”
“Alright, I get it. I got the wrong chips, I’ll go get the right kind.”
“I was gonna ask you a really important question, but my friend, the idiot, got the date wrong and now I don’t have a ring- I mean- fuck.”
“Oh, you were just kidding about this being a swim suit party?”
“When you said your friend was an asshole, I thought you meant it sarcastically.”
“I was calling to my other friend, and then you turned around and walked over, like, dude, I get you have the same names, but you shouldn’t just walk over to some stranger.”
“No, I said “do not under any circumstances do that.””
“Obviously, my friend got the address wrong, but I can’t say I’m upset to meet you.”
“You should’ve mentioned that before I said yes to the blind date…”
“I really, really hope I heard you wrong.”
“I swear I thought our date was set for seven… You know I wouldn’t stand you up.”
“I probably should’ve mentioned that I hate elevators.”
“It’s the middle of the winter… How did you think I said it would be warm today?”
“I’ll take the picture off, I didn’t realize you didn’t want me to post it.”
“Remember how I said I don’t know how to swim? I meant that.”
“Wait, but I didn’t want you to stop holding me.”
“I accidentally bought airplane tickets to the wrong place.”
“I forgot to tell my friends they were our ride back home, so… We’re kind of stuck here for awhile… In this awful weather.”
“When did I agree to that?”
“When did I agree to pretending to be your date?”
“Why’d you tell them we’re a couple?”
“I thought going to the mall meant fast food and people watching, and here I am holding five bags of clothes.”
“I’ve been waiting here at the airport for hours, are you oka-…. Wait, your flight isn’t until tomorrow?”
“I didn’t think you’d be staying over, so I didn’t get another bed ready…”
“Don’t you remember telling me you didn’t want to date?”
“We both waited all that time thinking that we didn’t want each other…”
“Next time we need to talk things through.”
“I’m so sorry, I misunderstood…”
“It’s not your fault, I made it sound way too complicated.”
“At least you have enough ice cream to last you for months now.”
“I’m so glad you told me what happened, I was about to go beat your ex up.”
“I thought… Didn’t you break up with him/her?”
“I didn’t realize you were hinting at wanting me to ask you to the dance with you. I thought it was obvious you were my date.”
“We said we weren’t getting each other gifts though.”
“I’m gonna be honest, I wasn’t focused at all on what you said earlier and didn’t get any of the things you needed from the store… Sorry.”
“If I’d known that, we would’ve started dating a long time ago.”
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