NO!!!! this is too cute… sid wyd babe 🥺

“Who has more game”

Quinn: in what? 😃

Also Quinn: *pours it into his own cup*

so obviously, this is not gonna apply to every single swedish person ever. but it goes a little something like this (this is from a woman’s perspective, so everything applies to swedish men)

1. women are the ones making the first move.

ironically enough, this did not apply to my boyfriend but most of my swedish friends, who are women and are in a relationship, they were the ones making the first move. swedish men like to be approached and feel wanted.

2. swedes DO NOT flirt.

now obviously, it’s not like they don’t flirt at all. but if you expect some pda and grand romantic gestures, do not expect that from swedes. they will dress nice, maybe check you out once or twice and wait for you to approach them. and if they’re REALLY into you, they’ll invite you for a fika/coffee later in the day.

3. they won’t ask you to date them

this actually happened to me. me and my boyfriend had sort of a “fuck buddies” kind of a situation before we started “dating”. but my boyfriend insisted on the fact that we’ve been dating for at least a year. this is a good example of “communication is a key” when it comes to swedish partners and especially, if you’re from a different country/culture. swedes are also very strict, when it comes to actual dating. “dating around” isn’t really a thing. once your swedish partner starts showing up for fika or they take you out for a stroll through a park, you can very well assume, you two are now dating.

4. swedes are very sex positive

this is something i honestly love about swedes. it’s their approach to sex. they don’t shy away from it. there is very little of objectifying of women. calling a woman “easy” or “a slut” or “a whore” is a big no no here. swedes like to have fun, when it comes to sex. sweden has also been the first country ever to have a mandatory sex education class in schools.

as much as they’re very committed in a relationship, swedes also love to sleep around. the term “kk” (stands for knullkompis), which means fuck buddy is very popular. it is not uncommon for people to have multiple KKs at once.

at the end of the day, relationship, no matter the nationality, is always about communication.

Hi, I'm back for another week and today I'm not going to talk about wags, but I'd like to tell you something that I've been thinking about for several days, it's related to the topic of women, I came up with a theory talking to a friend, I still have many doubts and of course I would like to know your opinions on the subject. Before I start I want to tell you that this is just out of curiosity, in part I am basing myself on many things that have been said here on tumblr so take everything I say with a grain of salt, I am just a psychology student who Many doubts arise and many theories arise, at no time do I have the intention of offending anyone or insulting or speaking ill of anyone, I only seek to share the things that suddenly come to my mind.

Basically I want to talk to you about how I have the theory that hockey players (or well, many men in general) have the Madonna complex, don't worry if you don't know it, I'll explain it to you later.

How did this thought arise?

Putting a little context of why I relate this theory, a few days ago as I mentioned I was talking to a friend who also likes hockey, her favorite player is Mat Barzal and she has clearly seen all the rumors that circulate here about his reputation with women, the islanders I think they had just arrived in Boston and fans went to meet them at the hotel, one of the fans had the opportunity to meet Barzal and told her experience on twitter and mentioned something like it had been very nice, he takes his time to talk with the fans, they talked for about 10 minutes, one of the friendliest of the team, he usually remembers you if you run into him on more than one occasion, basically she said that she had a very pleasant experience meeting him, and previously i have heard before very similar experiences from fans where they say that Mat is a very nice person and gets along very well with the fans.

Today while we were watching the game of the NY Islanders against the NJ Devils my friend sent me a link that I will leave you below in case you are interested in reading it so that you understand more what I am talking about, where someone who work for the isles organization says that after doing the media interviews, in the last game of the Isles which I think was against Columbus if I'm not mistaken, Barzal was the last to leave since one of the girls who worked within the organization had commented that it was her last day working for the team, to which he wanted to stay until after finishing to say goodbye to her and thank her for all the work and effort she had done for the team.

After seeing all this, my friend wondered how a person with a "bad reputation" could be like that, and the truth is that I also kept thinking. This is not limited to just talking about Mat Barzal, but hockey players in general, since they have more or less the same reputation. My friend and I also wondered how they can have certain attitudes towards certain women and certain attitudes towards others, and the truth is that at first I didn't understand it either until I remembered this information I saw a while ago, about the madonna complex.

Now what is the Madonna complex?

And to be clear, when we talk about the Madonna-whore complex, we're not talking about that Madonna…The Madonna Whore Complex shows us a dichotomy, designed under the assumption that those women who deserve respect, wives or mothers, the Madonnas or "Saints", are not seen as sexual beings. While those who are sexually desired are promiscuous, embarrassing and sinful, the "Whores". These concepts under the understanding that a woman cannot present herself with both qualities, she must be classified in one or another box because it does not show the possibility of conceptualizing a woman beyond these two categories. In Italian "Madonna" refers to the Virgin Mary, that holy, maternal, pure and beloved woman.

This idea was theorized by Sigmund Freud, the father of psychoanalysis, in the early 1900s through psychological studies of sexuality. Freud puts forward the idea that many men had difficulty respecting a woman in whom they could see their sexual desires reflected, while they were not attracted to one they loved or respected.

“Freud argued that the Madonna–whore complex is caused by oedipalcastration fears which arise when a man experiences the affection he once felt for his mother with women he now sexually desires. In order to manage this anxiety, the man categorizes women into two groups. Women he can admire and women he finds sexually attractive. Whereas the man loves women in the former category, he dismisses and devalues ​​the latter group.”

I am not going to go into many details regarding the development of the theory but if you are interested in knowing more about it I will leave you with different sources at the end where you can read a little more about it, and understand a little more about the point I want to get to and if I get there to find some study I will also leave them at the end.

Basically the madonna complex says that the man categorizes the woman into two sections she is pure or she is a whore, he cannot see the pure woman with sexual desires but he cannot respect the woman who openly expresses her sexual desires. and you will wonder how all this is related, this is where my theory comes from, I started thinking about the concept of this complex and personally it made me logical, we could say that in this case the fans are "Madonna" I don't mean that they literally see them as pure and chaste, what i'm trying to say is that representatively they would be giving them this role by putting them as that stereotype of "purity", adding that in the end they are the ones who consume the sport and who contribute to them being paid and blah blah blah which reflected their "good" attitude towards them being friendly and very good people, compared to the women with whom they express their sexual desires, being women who share these desires are not seen with respect in the eyes of them, which in the same way represents the attitudes that they express towards them after satisfying those needs, which leads to the bad experiences recounted by the women themselves.

And that is what my theory consists of and for me it makes sense, I don't know for you tell me what you think, you agree, you don't, maybe none of this is true and I only see things where there are none, you tell me, I hope you like this post and make you think, again I'm not looking to offend anyone just open our minds a little more and the panorama of what we know, and I know many will tell me, girl, freud's theories have already been disqualified by many experts, believe me I know, as I told you, I am a student of psychology, but they are theories that are still present in society and although they are disqualified, I think it is not bad to know them either just to know the different theories that at some point have constituted this science.

And beware, this is not only applicable to hockey players, but I think it can help us to reflect on how society is working today, I use the players as an example because otherwise we will never finish talking about the subject with the infinity of examples where we could apply it, I believe that we all have positive and negative aspects and our environment is the one that decides which to focus on, my recommendation is always to question everything you see, do not believe everything you see on the internet, and then give us respect among all, above all. Next week I will be back with Wags I still have some things that I would like to talk about them, maybe I will put this on the list of wags I still have not decided.

I repeat as I said above I leave here the post that I mentioned that I read about Barzal in case you are interested in going into more context about that, and I also leave you some sources that speak in detail about the Madonna Complex.

Mathew Barzal showing on-, off-ice maturity late in Islanders’ trying season — Kevin Kurz, The Athletic

Definition of the Madonna complex according to APA

The "Madonna-Whore complex" and retroactive jealousy

The Madonna whore complex puts women un danger

Hi, in recent days I have seen that there has been a confusion regarding an issue related to wags, so I want to clarify a little more how this matter works, this will not be a very long part since there is not much to explain but I will complement it with some other information that I find curious related to the subject or that I have found interesting about it and that you have asked me about their lifestyle, so I would like to clarify all these things.

It has been mentioned that the wags receive a payment from the nhl, that the company pays them a "salary" which I think has been confused a bit. Unless they work for the company, for one of the teams, or generally within the sports industry as a regular job, the NHL does not pay them. What does exist, for example, is that each group of wags internally has a kind of "budget" that is usually collected by the captain's wife, who is in charge of organizing the events for the same wags.

From what I can understand of how this system works, as mentioned by Grace Lee, wife of New York Islanders player Anders Lee, is that the other wags in the group are asked to contribute a certain amount of money that will be used to do activities among them, such as dinners, birthdays, bachelorette parties, baby showers, sending a gift to the new moms in the group, etc. Actually the money does not come from anyone but them, they put the money from their wallets, and it is used for their activities within the group of wags, she also mentions that all the wags are invited to get involved in activities but none is obliged, if any does not want to participate in these, it is their right not to do so and not to contribute the amount of money mentioned, there is no problem.

I don't know if this is what they have been referring to in recent days that this topic of conversation has arisen, but it seems important to clarify it so as not to misinform new people who are joining the community. Having clarified this, I would like to clarify other things that have been asked of me taking advantage of this post.

This is more like a random fact that I discovered recently and it made me curious and I wanted to share it with you, something that I think is interesting to mention is that, for example, one of the things in which the NHL can say that it is involved is that it covers health insurance of the families of the players, I don't know if you knew it but I didn't, it was interesting to mention it since it is something that I recently heard mentioned by Sandra Bostrom Hoppa, wife of Sebastian Aho, player of the New York Islanders, in the podcast “Breaking the ice” she says that apparently the nhl covers their health insurance at the birth of their children, which I found interesting to know since it was something that at some point caused me doubt considering how the health system works in the United States and that is quite expensive. I don't know if this is of interest to you or not, but I found it curious to know this information and well, we learned something new today.

Now, at the beginning of this series I was asked a question that was the one that gave rise to the whole idea of ​​creating this series to inform a little bit of the wag lifestyle, which was, Can the wags attend all the games? out of home? o Is there a rule that prohibits it? Actually that is not a rule or part of a contract, it is not something that is prohibited but the same conditions under which they live It does not allow it, they can attend as many games as they want regardless of whether they are at home or in some other city, what happens here is that most of them have their projects or jobs like any of us, they take care of their children and families, which It does not allow them from going to see their partners at all the games, many of them they don't even go to all the games that are at home. We have an idea of ​​them and their lifestyle that although it is not always as we see it within social networks or as we have heard it is, it is good that we can inform ourselves of how things really are, so no, the wags they are not prohibited from going to all away games.

Another thing I've heard about wags is that they can't be bothered by anything that happens around them or that their plans are constantly changing because they decided to have that lifestyle, and this is not true, I mean that they they are human like any of us and clearly there will be things with which they do not agree regardless of the fact that they chose to follow their partners and accompany them, but in the same way it does not mean that they are not aware of the lifestyle they chose is kind of strange to explain but they also have their way of thinking, there are going to be things that they will or will not agree with regardless of their decisions.

I will leave here the links to the podcasts that I mention in case you are interested in knowing more about these topics, you know that your opinions are always welcome and I hope I have clarified your doubts, if you have more you can write to me and I will be answering them and I hope you like this part.

Home team

Claude Giroux 🤝 Sidney Crosby “Excuse me, but I’m right”