And she keeps it all to herself

I have been really bad since last week and today I'm feeling so disgusting. Idk what to do anymore, I don't want to think about anything, just wanna die fast

right now i have this amazing girlfriend, awesome best friend, and supportive parents, and yet i still have the urge to kill myself. my parents took my stuff because i had to go to the hospital from attempting, and after that everyone thought i was better, but i’m not. i’m such a disappointment to my family and friend, i shouldn’t be depressed or suicidal, but i still am, and i don’t know what to do because i think i’m gonna end it.. fuck.. help?

Okay so like with my counselor like- it makes me see how much like- want not a relationship but like- somebody who I could just talk to and like… talk about what’s going on in my life and they genuinely care about what I’m talking about and is genuinely invested in the conversation and like- I guess that’s kinda a relationship I want to have like just talking about stuff in life and what we had fun doing and shit, y'know?