🌊🐚🧜‍♀️

I’d say im fine and accept

They all left me standing here

Like a bag for bones and

just holding all my flesh.

 They all pounced away at first glance

Of my intense internal nature

The smoke tinged stains

Like a painted face

And im cursed for being so 

Goddamn mature, for my age.

 Like a Legend in a small town,

A cryptid seeps into all this darkness

I really feel the energy around

Like signs of high power I could harness.

 Now that the sun sets in the afternoon

watching for you is like watching weather

And now I can wither too.

A life, a match to strike,

 a head to hold under some Holy Water

I love you like a son

Who  loves his Holy father.

To cleanse my space

I stoke the flames

And hold a righteous breath

So much longer.

I really feel it this time 

I really feel it this time around

I grow and i know 

I know I'm getting older,

 you reap memories that I have to sow

you think you're

Washing the wound,

But healing the surface,

The Apple Tree

The Apple Apple Tree is me.

i will nurture other people

And suck the poison from their wounds,

I contain my rage like they never uttered

vitrol,

Cause we waded the same waters of the

womb.

I feel exposed and raw and open

I think i need a root canal,

But i act like some straw hat showman,

Wave you past the wreckage of my morale.

Im still standing tall as i can be,

Like a stone against the sea, at five foot

three

I bend, with the thrashing of the breeze

With my branches high above

And all my roots deep down below

I'm sky and sun and sea and earth

And its all i will ever know.

I wish everyday i was different,

My insecurities are eating me alive,

because I don't think i want to be here,

but I don't think i wanna die.

Everyday I wish that i was richer

And money grew on trees

They say the apple don't fall too far though,

But do they know why it bleeds?

Im still standing so tall,

Like a stone against the sea, at five foot

three,

I bend with the thrashing of the breeze

With my branches high above

And all my roots deep down below

I'm sky and sun and sea and earth

And its all i will ever know.

The Apple Tree

The Apple Tree

The Apple Tree is me

You see, the axe weilds it's scars with ease,

But with time it forgets,

The branches that it's struck down,

And all the reasons why they wept.

I Wish could paint a better portrait

For anyone who's willing to see,

I wish I could be more cathartic

But im always a little melancholy

I'll be petty, selfish and understanding

To anyone i love,

Just as they ask me for my organs

Or maybe a few liters of my blood

I'll put them on a silver platter over ice

Just watch until all the corvids come,

Just so you know, dinners served at five.

Im still standing so tall,

Like a stone against the sea,

I bend with the thrashing of the breeze

With my branches high above

And all my roots deep down below

I'm sky and sun and sea and earth

And its all i will ever know.

The Apple Tree

The Apple Tree

The Apple Tree is she

My sister's heart condition

Is the worst she's ever had,

But the truth is she was always afflicted

Before the connection was ever bad.

Its been so long since we've laughed as

we'd sing

And im still hanging on the swing

Searching for the ground

White knuckles through the thrash

Im still standing so tall,

Like a stone against the sea,

I bend with the thrashing of the breeze

With my branches high above

And all my roots deep down below

I'm sky and sea and earth

And its all i will ever know.

Its all ill ever know

The Apple Tree

The Apple Tree

The Apple Tree are we

I was bound to some deeply rooted ache,

From such a tender age,

Some i couldnt understand

Until i was twenty eight

I hope one day I get to be the axe

With my handle made of me

And I can choose the blow

'Cause I will never break.

(The Apple Tree)

(The Apple Tree )

The Professional

I am a professional escape artist

when it comes to you,

But it’s not my fault the flame burns bright,

Its just something that you make me do.

Id saw myself in peices

If one of me weren't enough,

And dissingrate before the audience

If you said I was too much.

I turn you inside out,

in brand new ways,

and i think I like the transcendent way it tastes.

I hope you take this in a confessional way,

My temper is the hottest torch,

Ive learned to leave without a trace,

When it all starts feeling forced,

He'll remember my warm embrace.

I have a concupiscent taste,

I cant explain why it aches,

I guess it's rooted in my stature.

I have monster inside me

Not a serpent but something else, entirely.

And she lays dormant till she feeds,

she wraps a scaley fist around him even faster

As i tell the prey not to panic

she's spitting out seeds,

And picking with his widdled bones

The space between her teeth where theres meat.

No offense i guess but I'm just being honest,

I'm a sucker for expensive baby blues

Watch me cannonball right back into jewels.

I'm a soft girl but I have to try my hardest,

I missed all your signals and left you feeling haunted,

Im a sight to see and think i need a harness,

Throw me a raft honey, pull me out the darkness.

Angels can be evil baby I swear that I'm harmless,

I'm a good girl but you make me feel desperate,

I'll forgive but baby you that know my minds set.

Tell me darling, did I give the wrong impression?

Make you believe that this is less than an obsession?

Apply some pressure so you learn some lessons?

Watch your mouth baby you know I'm a blessing.

I'm a sweet girl but my knife is the sharpest,

I'll claw your back and I know you'll learn to like it,

I'll have you strung out on a sinker when those lines hit,

Dripping down my thighs cause i know you love when i ride it .

I'm a mess and i like it,

you love my sighs, and i love the deep end.

i'm a bright girl but you got me acting reckless

Drag myself across your body baby down to the trenches,

Suck the life from your eyes where the light is,

disguised as the devil, and troubled by details

This is not so preferential.

I wish I wasn't so cursed with all this high potential,

I could get high just so i

could find some private temple,

I ache to be some wild spectacle,

A siren luring your pirate's vessel.

The crashing of a wave, the secret sounds i make because

You know I'll never stay.

I'm the aurora, after the

Brightest spectrals

Blue green hues dancing around in the liminal

All I have is high potential.

A satellite that orbits high above your lovely life, and bears witness to it.

i'm the asteroid you're begging to crash into.

THE OSSUARY

The earth holds her softly now,

More than any man could,

But she's cried a river of tears,

More than anyone should.

You know, it isn't so justified,

What is the purpose of her pain?

The break in bone has calcified,

It's a woman's burden; to shoulder the blame.

But if you ask me the reason why isn't she here,

Id tell you her memory lingers

like the scars of blades

And it lingers long after the hurt.

Were her deepest wounds fated?

She rests in her gilded ossuary

To peer upon her kin,

A problem of divine timing

You find

Who's misty eyed in the mourning?

And who's fatal flaws find comfort

With our backs against the wall,

We really are the closest,

Adolescents in our tattered jeans

Drinking the poison from our trophies

we've been through it all.

Cradle to the grave until fall,

From frozen frigid grounds,

to spring and then the Summer

until all the flowers bloom

then they whither by the fall.

Anxiously anticipating

The crash and then the call.

Changing aches like growing pains

And i do like the weather,

Cells divide and multiply,

And tissue grows without a reason,

While my body is teathered by

an arsenal of its own organic treason.

The pain, it comes and goes

like Tidal highs and lows,

And my appetite varies from

Synthetic hormones.

And i can't recall a single page,

That i read just last week,

So my thirst for understanding

Supplements my intolerance of heat.

I Used to be so scared that I

would lose faith in my belief

My system runs on over drive,

So i medicate with THC.

Drinking doesn't work for me,

I end up feeling worse,

So I put the bottle down

Despite this wretched curse.

The curse to feel anything,

and nothing at all at once

Not feeling Pain is something

like pleasure,