A Collection Of Thoughts & Random Stories & Rants

All I can think to say is, FUCK. YOU. fuck you're BULLSHIT lies. Fuck everything that you said to me before. We are not friends now. You made the choice to lie to me instead of just being straight up, and I'm less mad than hurt. So thank you J. You hurt my feelings and you don't give a shot. None of you give a shit. And if you, you're doing a damn good job at making sure I can't tell. So congrats. I'm sure you don't care, but I really thought you were cool! I claimed y'all as friends and you go and act like I'm just an easily thrown away person. Is it the way I talk? Am I too squeaky? Am I annoying?? Do I talk to much?? Do I smell weird? (Actually, maybe don't answer that...) Well, have fun with my boyfriend. I'm glad y'all can have fun together. It's honestly my favorite thing to hear you all laughing while I'm sitting in my car waiting for him to come back so I can have a friend...

I want to be a good person with good morals that gives off good vibes. Someone that's trustworthy and kind to everyone. An open book with a certain something that make me a mystery. I want to fully be me and only me. I want to have my own opinions and my own thoughts. My own likes and dislikes. I want to be free from the cage of society and unbound from the ropes of those who are pulling me ever downward into the darkness. I want to be a light. A reflection of hope for those who are lost and weary and have longed for a true smile to cross their lips. I want to prove everyone wrong; that I can be someone. That I can do whatever I put my mind to. I WILL move mountains. I WILL change the worlD! With my hopes, my dreams, my ideas, and my actions, I will be one who made their life count. There is no ONE plan that is our own. There are the paths we are given and we decide the paths we take. We make our life what it is. So pick yourself up when your down. Look in the mirror and say "You have a Purpose. You are unique. You are the hope that someone has needed." I may not always live my life like this, but someday I hope I become this person. And I'll look back and be proud of the changes I made.

Honestly? It's going to be a long journey, and I don't know if either of us are ready for it....

All my friends are getting engaged and it's super depressing.

I've been awake for 55 hours. I think I'm dying. I've been surviving on aderall and weed since Wednesday morning. I sorta just wanna quit school right now and work and get money and then go back. Nah.