Sapphose on AO3

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine

Winn Adami who spent so much of her life imprisoned under fascist regime with the threat of genocide looming over her. Who never partook in the resistance but instead turned to prayer and faith in a jail cell, relied on it to get her through those dark, dark years. Who behaved like the perfect faithful servant, who dedicated her life to her faith, who did everything she was supposed to do. She was non-violent and peaceful. She was dutiful and good. She did everything she was asked to do, everything she could have done. And none of it was ever enough

Can you imagine that? Dedicating your life to something, doing everything you’re supposed to do in line with your faith, everything that those that came before you did to hear their voices, and it isn’t enough? You were good. You never raised a hand to anyone. You taught what you were supposed to teach. And they never speak to you. They could, but they don’t. Instead, this human comes along, and they speak to him. They make him their emissary. They say nothing to you, day in and day out, they’re silent. You become the leader of your faith and still they’re silent. How do you become anything else than what she becomes? How do you become anything less than angry? Bitter? Resentful?

Kai Winn is frequently treated like she hasn’t suffered the same as so many other Bajorans, she’s talked down to about her faith and her people, she’s treated like she’s on par with those who oppressed her. And I’m not saying she’s in the right- but man, can you blame her for ending up the way she does? She endured a lifetime of trauma by clinging to faith and the idea that if she was good enough, if she listened to the Prophets and did their bidding, taught their teachings, then everything would work out. She would be rewarded. And she never is. Her entire life is a battle that she never wins. No wonder she’s angry. No wonder she’s bitter. No wonder she’s resentful and petty and condescending