i love being a lesbian

this... book? (the format is why i question the name. it's fiction-at-length that may not be finished yet? unclear. it's serialized.)

ANYWAYS it's written by a guy with really fascinating politics like I'm obsessed. what a weird peek into a cishet man's psyche. I'm studying him like a specimen it's such a fascinating tension between his desire to be a "good person" and his desire to be aggressive and brutal and do cool huge mass murders with his magic and be a dangerous sexy man with a sexy happy exotic slave wife and a cranky enslaved magical advisor who learns to love his owner as all do who know him...

if you think I'm conflating the author with a fantasy version of himself, yes. he IS a fantasy version of himself and this is a self indulgent—and i use this with no negative connotation, just to describe the type of enjoyment—masturbatory fantasy. it's so unfiltered and earnest, i think the author fantasizes about being that character as he falls asleep each night.

the earnestness and me having absolutely no expectations of quality have meant im not even pissed off every moment despite all the yknow weird racisms and misogynies and stuff. he is generally fairly uh uninformed about how virtually anything works and he does not care because that's not the fun part.

oh my god I can't tell them any of this because they will hate their fav thing

but holding it in has been killing me there's so MUCH i kind of want to write essays about it but that would be mean.

but holy shit. there's just so much to TALK about!! also i found out today i BADLY underestimated his heterosexual sexual conservatism which in context was hysterically funny and i couldn't yell about it to anyone who would get why it's funny???

like. wow.

but i genuinely am kind of impressed that someone with that extremely obvious whole deal made what was clearly a massive effort to write all of this.