saoir

because you were the sole figure that fuelled his night fantasy—it was you, existing in his mind that made him a restless mess. the thought of your eyes on his, the tone of your voice, your movements and your habits—it was you who made his dick ache as it pulsed relentlessly against the fabric of his pants.

there was a recurring hope in his mind that he could simply ignore his hard-on, and wake up to the tent in his pants gone, but he knew he'd be lying to himself.

lee was frustrated, but above all, he was clueless. he didn't want to face the coldness of a shower right now, and he didn't want to feel the warmth of his palm jacking himself off either. he wanted you—needed you, but how could he satiate that craving if you were nowhere within his reach?

he sits up on his back, pushing himself up to lean against the headboard of his bed. in doing so, his palm collides into his pillow. he notices the spongy softness of it. the texture of it makes him think of you for a second. when he transfers the silk-lined pillow from behind him to his lap, there's a gentle gust of air that lands on his nostrils. the air still carries your scent from the last time you were here.

the last time, you spent the whole day training with lee until it got dark. it became a routine of yours to go home with lee and sleep over, since his place was closer to the training grounds than yours. by the time you reached his house, you were so exhausted that you could barely help yourself from falling asleep on his bed right there and then, wrapped around his pillow.

lee removed himself from that daydream of a recent memory, and found himself staring at the pillow.

he swallowed.

his desire was persuading his mind to go down a place he didn't want to go, and yet, he still was curious.

lee sighed, his thumbs tentatively slipping underneath the waistband of his boxers. he pulled them down, they pooled at his ankles, and he kicked them off.

he was curious to know what you could feel like.

his dick slapped against his abs, just beneath his bellybutton. he turned over so his stomach could remain parallel to the mattress, the pillow now beneath him, and he bit his lip as he sank his hardened length into the pillow, testing the plushness of it.

he squeezed his eyes shut at how surprisingly pleasant it felt. slowly, he chases the sensation, repeating the pistoning motions of his hips into the pillow.

"y/n..." lee's voice is a shaky whisper in the air. his eyebrows furrow together with each and every stroke he makes. he hears your sweet voice circulating around his head, and a helpless whimper escapes his lips. he wishes it was you beneath him. he could give you so much.

he rutted his hips against the pillow with more ardour. warm heat crept up his body before settling on his cheeks, leaving them pink. droplets of precum leaked from his flushed tip, and left a dark patch on the pillow.

"oh... oh my..." lee huffed, feeling his abs tense at the insurmountable pleasure. he puts a thumb over the base of his cock, applying pressure onto it as he relentlessly thrusted into the pillow. he grinded his teeth, pretending it was your pussy he was pounding into instead. "y/n, y/n, y/n... please..." he moaned out.

he was getting drunk on the feeling, and he couldn't stop his whining to save his life. if fucking his pillow felt this good, he couldn't imagine what being with you would feel like. his thrusts started to become less controlled and more erratic. beads of sweat rolled down his face, and he could sense the familiar feeling of release knocking. he was close, and desperate to let go.

"a-ahh!"

his thighs clenched, his calves locked, his balls spasmed, and his jaw grew slack. total bliss encapsulated his body as spurts of warm cum shot out of his pulsating cock, drenching the pillow.

lee stayed motionless, his head thrown back in a blissful haze, before he ran a hand through his hair and opened his eyes to look at the aftermath of his indulgence. he didn't know he was capable of producing that much cum, and it made his face go red. all because of you in his head.

"goodness..." he removed the wet lining of his pillow. "if y/n knew about this...." he thought to himself, finding a clean pillowcase. "i wouldn't hear the end of it."

the next day, lee would have to see you in the flesh, and fight. not just you during practise spars, but also, fight his emotions. fight with his composure. fight to stay sane around you. but at least he was seeing you instead of imagining you, right?

a week has passed since that night.

that torturous night where lee fucked his pillow, wanting it to be you. the days that followed were relatively ordinary, and to his surprise, he did a good job at maintaining his composure.

there were occasional moments where he was quicker to blush than usual. he'd overthink when you had to spot him during training, and place your hands on his body to correct his form. he'd also overthink whenever you'd laugh at something he said, and let your hands playfully linger over his bicep.

and he'd overthink once more when you were walking home with him again after training.

the walk to lee's place was marked by a comfortable silence and the chatter of cicadas. you were both happy with your efforts today, but the two of you were slightly too drained to communicate that to each other right now. occasionally, your knuckles would brush against his, and in your shared wordlessness, neither of you would address it. but your thumping hearts would fill the silence.

lee opened the front door to his house. you thank him briefly when he lets you in before himself, and you hear the door shut from behind him. it smells like sandalwood and faint incense inside. a sigh escapes you as you remove your sandals and feel the cold wood against your bare feet. lee does the same, turning to face you.

"y/n, i am going to shower!"

"lee, could i use your shower?"

your voices synchronise, eliciting a soft laugh from you, and a dimpled grin from lee.

"y/n, you can go before me. i do not mind at all!"

"yeah, but," your voice floats. "i take a bit longer than you, i don't wanna keep you waiting, y'know?"

"then i will wait! as long as you want me t-"

you can already sense that this back-and-forth will last indefinitely, so without thinking, you just throw whatever words come to mind to end it.

"let's just shower together."

you want to look away, but you don't. lee can feel the back of his neck and his ears getting warm. his eyes slightly widen at you.

"...if you want to?" you rubbed the back of your neck, sheepish in your attempt to put out the flames you created.

a long pause follows. you wonder if that was really the right thing to say, until...

"no, no, y/n, i want to!"

lee nods frantically, wearing a façade of confidence to disguise the trembling of his heart. his fists clench around nothing, overwhelmed by the request. "i can not back out of this. i will shower with you!"

you can't help but laugh over how enthusiastic he is about.. a shower. thankfully, your laughter makes lee's shoulders relax and his fists release.

"but..." his voice is quieter. "only if you are comfortable, y/n."

you tilt your head, lips together retaining a small grin. "well, i can't back down from this either. i'm the one who brought it up."

he walked to the bathroom and you trailed behind him. you both pause once he's at the door.

you take a small step closer to him and nudge him lightly. "you'll keep your word too, won't you?"

he feels his confidence wavering when you touch him. "definitely, y/n. i will prove myself for you."

you giggle, and the bathroom door shuts behind you.

lee's bathroom had enough space to keep all of the personal products you had stashed away at his place whenever you'd come over: your lotions, your body butters, all of your serums and oils, but yet, it still felt small. the wisps of steam obscuring your surroundings in a slight fog made the bathroom feel even smaller. the sound of running water was too loud. and you both felt too conscious.

something as simple as undressing yourself should be straightforward. showering shouldn't ever be such a big deal, but the situation you're in with lee exists in a liminal space between 'normal,' and something else you can't exactly define. he's on the opposite end of the bathroom, a distance that seems too far to just be incidental. you can feel his eyes flickering on you from time to time while he rests against the sink, slowly unravelling the bandages on his wrist.

you couldn't tell if he was buying time for the two of you, trying to gauge your reaction, or both. in response, you hesitantly reach for the hem of your shirt and lift it slowly, revealing your navel.

every motion began to feel like a silent conversation. you pause at your navel, and he pauses at his bandages. lee's round eyes find yours for a moment, and his gaze flickers to the red band on his hip before meeting your eyes again, almost as if he was seeking your permission to remove it. so you remove your headband in affirmation. and so does he.

your shirt comes off. so does the top half of his jumpsuit.

your skirt comes off. so does the remaining bottom half of his jumpsuit.

lee was grateful for the hot steam right now, because it meant he could blame the blush on his face on that, instead of the fact that you, his night fantasy, were in front of him—practically naked, save for your underwear.

"i'm going to turn around..." your voice comes out softer than you want it to.

"i understand, y/n."

when lee turns around, you do the same to unclasp your bra and slip off your panties. from lee's side of the bathroom, you can hear the sound of his boxers dropping to the floor.

"lee?"

"yes, y/n?"

your feet are facing him. you note how toned his back is, and you bite your lip quickly.

"you can turn around now."

"are you sure?"

"yeah."

lee turns in your direction. you're met with the sight of him: his muscular chest faintly shifting as he breathes in and out. your gaze lingers on his sharp collarbones, and you notice the broadness of his combat-scarred shoulders. they're tense, almost as if he doesn't know what to do with himself. your eyes dip to trace the outline of his abs, and it makes your core pulse.

when you look back up at his face, he's already watching you. you feel exposed, but there's a part of you that enjoys his lingering eyes on your body. he's watching your soft breasts and the way they slope. your tummy and the way it tightens under his watch. he's looking at the birthmarks, stretch marks, and beauty marks that decorate your skin in various places. you're better than any image he could conjure in his mind.

"lee..." you call out through the sound of running water, gesturing your head towards the shower.

his back straightens at the sound of your voice, like he remembers where he is.

"forgive me, y/n. we should not wait any longer." his heart is speeding dangerously. "after you."

warm water sends you both to a realm of relaxation, distant from earlier's harsh training, and far from the recent tension outside of the shower.

you don't feel all that nervous around him right now. the shower's soothing—so soothing, that you forget to create distance between yourself and lee, who seems too intent on giving you space. your shoulder brushes against his skin in the water, and he locks up immediately.

"lee?"

you place a hand on his shoulder, getting him to face you. in doing so, he keeps his gaze averted, treating the ordeal as if it's a training exercise where looking could mean death. it doesn't last long, though. he drops it, and looks at you.

his adam's apple bobs. "yes...?"

"i was a little nervous too."

you reach for the shower gel, making your movements deliberate and careful. the gel trickles onto the washcloth and you lather, the sweet scent of jasmine blossoming as bubbles form.

"letting someone see you completely, with nothing to hide behind..."

you take the soap-covered cloth and make slow circles on your chest in a way that's almost exhibitionistic. the way your skin glistened with each circle was hypnotic to lee. the bubbles demanded him to observe the valley of your breasts and your hardening nipples.

"...it's a lot, isn't it?" you purr.

lee clears his throat. "it can be, y/n. i agree..."

he thought this situation could be worked around—that he would be able to resist his temptation, resist you. but he couldn't help it right now. he couldn't resist the familiar warm feeling that swept across his thighs. the same feeling he felt a week ago, during that night when he thought of you. the same feeling that stirred a pulse in his dick. he could feel himself getting hard, all because of you.

"but i trust you, lee."

you trace the silhouette of your stomach, following the slight hollow of your waist, and the dips of your hips. some of the suds drip slowly onto your thighs, like treacle. your words make him even harder.

"that.. that makes me pleased, y/n." his voice is soft, like misting rain.

you step closer to him and lock eyes. his lips are slightly agape. his wet, dark locks hang over his forehead. you can feel him exhaling on your lips. you're both so close, but yet, apart.

"lee. do you trust me?"

"i do, y/n. i trust you entirely."

at this point, getting clean isn't even at the forefront of your mind, so you forget about the washcloth and drop it. you just want to feel him underneath your fingertips. you gather more gel in the palm of your hands, lather it, and start with his shoulders, tracing his scars gently as you trail down the musculature of his arms.

"you're so strong, aren't you?" you hum. "you always work so hard, lee."

"y-yes... i do..." he responds breathily, feeling flustered by your saccharine words.

your soapy hands continue their ministrations as you leave bubbles on his firm chest. your fingers brush past his nipples briefly, earning a gasp from him.

lee's resolve deteriorates even further when you sink onto your knees and follow it up with your palms going south. they chase along the taut definition of his abs, follow his v-line, and stop there abruptly. he can feel his heart pounding. maybe it's the excitement of his fantasies turning real, or maybe it's the simmering heat he feels when he notices that your hands are dangerously close to his throbbing cock. either way, it makes him call out your name in desperation.

"mmm, i know, i know..." your voice is like butter. "do you want me to touch you?" your eyes shift to his hard dick and back up to his eyes.

he swallows. "i would want nothing more right now, y/n." his breath quakes under your touch. "i do not care. just touch me to your liking. please."

both of you know you've crossed a profound boundary simply by being here. but the minute your soft lips wrap around the flushed tip of his cock, you both know you can't return. his breath hitches as he feels your warm tongue drag against the underside of his length. he can feel you mapping out his veins with your tongue. the obscene breaths he's letting out are like music to your ears

"h-hah..." he looks down at you with half-lidded eyes, and you look up at him through your eyelashes. you think he's so hot when he's helpless against you.

your less dominant hand finds purchase on lee's thigh, while your other hand firmly wraps around the shaft of his dick. your hot mouth takes him in slowly inch by torturous inch, until your nose is flush against the faint dark hairs at his base. you hold for a moment, just long enough to make him whimper, and as you retreat, a "pop!" sound arises from the suction on his tip being released.

you stroke him steadily, compensating for the warmth of your mouth. "did you like that?" your voice gently parts through the sound of running water.

"v-very much," he hisses through clenched teeth. "please... could you allow me to have more of you, y/n?"

that's all you need to hear. his desire is all you need to see. you tease briefly, swirling your tongue around his pink tip and savouring the taste of his flesh as you trail kisses along the sides. you took him back into your mouth and bobbed your head up and down his length with hollowed cheeks as your hands worked to cover what your mouth couldn't reach.

lee bit back a whine as you hummed around him, sending vibrations down his body that made him shudder. the moans started to spill endlessly from his mouth now. he couldn't restrain himself, and you loved it. you loved the power you had over him. you loved that you could make him feel this way, with nothing but your mouth, even if your jaw was beginning to ache with how big he was.

the very sight of him: his head tilted back against the tiles with water cascading down his muscles, his once orderly bowl cut—now dishevelled—his parted lips, and his heaving chest—it turned you on.

your hand replaced your mouth, stroking him faster. "i love how you feel in my mouth, lee." you breathe against his skin.

"y-you do?" he's quick to speak back, but his dick is even quicker to answer when it twitches and leaks precum at the sound of your flattery.

"yeah," you answer breathily. "you taste so good..."

he whines, and you chuckle softly when his dick throbs at your words.

you lick his sweet precum, taking him back into your mouth and repeating your movements with greater fervency. you wanted him to cum. every single moan, every call of your name, and every breath was a sweet melody that you couldn't get enough of. you felt your arousal pooling beneath you as you got lost in the act of pleasuring him.

his moaning grew louder and more frequent. his voice bounced off the bathroom walls and teased your ears. he was going to surrender soon, and you could feel it.

"y/n..." he panted breathlessly "i am- i'm going to... oh- i'm so close... i'm getting so, so close..."

lee's hands were gentle when they found the back of your head, pushing it further onto his dick. he's losing his discipline. he wants to let you do all the work, but you feel too good. you're undoubtedly better than his pillow. you're better than his wet dreams. how could you blame him for thrusting his hips into your mouth?

you suck your cheeks in harder. your tongue swirls firmer circles on his tip. and with a final twist of your hands, you can feel all the muscles in lee's body go taut with his climax. his abs tensed, his thighs trembled, and the final moan escaped him along with a tear from his eye. his dick pumped a flood of warm cum that spilled into your mouth, and you savoured every last droplet. it tasted like water. your lips are glossy when you remove his dick from them. you open your mouth to reveal to lee that you had, in fact, swallowed his essence. the act makes his dick jump, and you both laugh softly over it.

you got off your knees and stood back on your feet, making your eye contact with lee more level now. he snakes his arms around your waist and pulls you closer so that your chest is pressed flush against his. your hearts beat in synchrony underneath the warm shower, and the feeling skin-to-skin brings you both back down to earth from the heights of your erotic daze. for a while, everything is still. you brush his bangs upwards to reveal his forehead, and plant a kiss on it that makes him blush faintly.

"y/n?" lee's voice is a near-whisper.

"yeah?"

he peeks at the long-forgotten, and now-remembered washcloth you dropped behind you earlier. "shall we finish our shower?"

the irony of it all makes you laugh. you showered together, and the one thing you both did was get each other dirty.

"yeah." you smile. "let's finish."

bonus:

ambient quietness filled lee's bedroom, and warm air from outside crept in. the lamp on his bedside counter chased the night shadows and cast everything in a soft, orange glow.

he's shirtless and on his back in bed, staring at the ceiling with arms tucked behind his head. the smell of your cocoa butter lingers on his skin, and it makes him feel warm while he stares at the incense smoke making shapes above him.

meanwhile, you're down on the floor, laid on your side with a hand propping your head up. there's a book beneath you that you're not necessarily reading, but the delicate sounds of pages flicking floats in the room regardless, and you feel peace.

"you know..." lee's voice carefully cuts through the comfortable silence.

you pause in the middle of flicking a page and turn your head towards his voice.

"i thought of you being here, y/n... quite recently."

you raise an eyebrow, a light smirk gracing your lips.

"like, me, here in your room?" you placed the book down to cast your full attention on him. "where are you taking this?" you tease.

"nowhere!" he says that a little too quickly, and a little bit too loud for his own good.

"well, i must be honest... i think about you often, y/n. but this time, it was different."

"how so?" you play with the hem of your shorts, with eyes that blink slowly at him.

he swallows, and he's staring holes into the ceiling, like he wants it to give him answers.

"come onnnn, lee," your voice playfully drags, "you literally came in my mouth," you sit up. he shuts his eyes. "we showered together," you crawl towards his bed. "lee, i rubbed my lotion all over your sk-"

"-and i touched myself thinking about you." he muttered.

"what?"

silence applied pressure on both of you for a few seconds.

his voice is louder than before, but it's still tinged with a hushed hesitancy. "the pillow smelled like you, and... it.. it just happened..."

a quiet laugh falls out of your lips. it makes his face simmer with bashful heat, and his eyes shut even tighter. you crawled to the edge of his bed to rest your arms on the mattress, leaving your face a few inches away from his.

"for real?" your genuine curiosity somehow makes this worse than you mocking him.

"extremely, y/n."

you got up and settled your knees on the mattress, placing your thighs on either side of lee's hips before lowering your backside down onto his lap.

"so, what exactly made you cum? was it my face?my voice? my a-"

"y/n!" his voice bursts out of embarrassment, triggering a fit of laughter from you.

"sorry, sorry!" you raise your hands.

"those questions are beyond reason right now..."

he opens his eyes to look at you through those thick, dark eyelashes before averting his gaze.

"...it was your voice. and your smell... and everything. it was everything... please forgive me, y/n." he admits quietly.

"aw, there's nothing to forgive, lee." you frown sympathetically and give his cheek a light pinch. "just don't fuck your pillow..." the sound of your chuckling rings in his ear. it's tender and free from any mockery.

it makes him relax a little. his eyes meet yours again, and his large hands settle on your hips.

"lee, if there's something you want, you can tell me. i think about you too sometimes... we can help each other..." your thumbs stroke against the back of his hands.

"you would do that?"

"yeah, of course i would."

"you do not have to." he says, slightly more firm in tone. i did not confess to acts with my pillow so i could earn your body, y/n..."

"lee, i know," you groan. "you're not the kind of person who would do something like that. you told me because you felt comfortable enough to. i feel comfortable too, so i want to keep doing this with you."

he can feel his face getting warm.

"it's the same way we were both comfortable enough to shower together, the same way you were comfortable enough to let me suck your d-"

"y/n!!!" he interrupts your profanity.

"fine, fine." you tease, ruffling his bowl cut.

it comforted lee to know that you trusted him so much, that you would offer your body to him. it was also a relief for him to find that you didn't meet his confession with disgust or harsh judgment either. instead, you'd allow him to show you the most intimate and vulnerable parts of himself. you wanted to continue being around him. it made him smile.

"alright, let's go to sleep now, 'kay? it's a long day tomorrow."

"certainly."

you lean forwards, now laid on top of lee with your head resting on his chest. his arm reaches for the lamp on the bedside counter to turn it off, before it finds your waist and cradles it. he could stay like this forever with your full weight on him.

"sleep well, y/n." he kisses the top of your head.

you hum. "good night, lee."

a/n: currently balancing fanfic with finals but this is rlly fun for me! please keep giving me requests guys, and If you have, i haven't forgotten! if you want to be tagged when i drop, lmk