hi

meredith, how do i open a new tab

im going to cry

look at this fucking baby

i can’t fucking believe this wtf wtf wtf wtf

Hate when ppl call fidgety stuff a "nervous habit" I'm bouncing my leg cause I'm bored not cause I'm a scared little bitch

I’m charging up. Will not say what for

Every single one of Hillary’s deleted emails is me sending her a neopets referral

I just know it was a woman who made the first soup. A man could not have this range

do u ever send smth in a chat thats not even risqué like “i luv salsa” but no one responds so u start overthinking it like…. maybe one of their parents died making salsa…… maybe they were all just talking abt how they hate salsa……. maybe salsa isnt evn real and they have no idea what im talking abt

i”M CRYING

Literally no comedian could plan out something funnier than this