My Core

Do you only appear in my mind

In the melodramatic ache of my loneliness?

Why

Do I remember the butterflies, born from your grace and my infatuatiob, that had long escaped from my core

Why

Is it when I have no one to lie on that

You haunt me in my darkest moments, and I am unable to prevent your nightshade memories from slipping down my throat.

No matter how many layers I shed you are still there

Apart of me

Surrounding me

You block my senses, fill my nose with your sultry and nauseous essence

You make me wish to have never gone close to the fire, the beautiful colors, the intoxicating warmth you radiate

I scrub my skin, spray fragrance, but the last bit of you still persists

You are gone! Burnt away! No fire will ever be lit with your ash!

How did you get in?

Are you here to eat my clothes? Ruin my sheets? Smack at the window and ruin my sleep?

Little moth on my wall

With your brown and tan colors and powdery wings, you do not blend into this scene

I go to capture you, with nothing but my hands, struggling to not crush your fragile self

You escape in a flurry away

Little moth on my wall

Will you die if I leave you to the wintery cold? Freeze and drop and decompose

Shall I leave you inside? To fly and be warm and die by old life?

Little moth on my wall

I am the bee

We do our dance every spring

I tell you I love you

And you say the same

Please

We haven’t seen it all

There are games we still need to play

The sun has yet to reach its highest in the clear blue sky, so

Don’t go

Please

We haven’t eaten for hours, I know you’re hungry too

The wind is soft and warm, its too nice to not take a walk after

We haven’t finished talking of our lives, so

Please

Don’t go

It’s starting to rain, and I forgot my umbrella, my house is the closest

Our clothes are soaked, so wait here while they dry, wouldn’t want you miserable

It’s already near dinner and it would be a shame for you to miss my new recipe, so

Please

Don’t go

It’s raining cats and dogs out there, lets see if we can wait it out

There’s this new movie I know you’ll love, we can make some hot chocolate too

It’s dark now, and you’d have to drive a long way, so why not spend the night?

Stay

Please

I know you have to go

I know you can’t be here forever

You have your life to get back to, your friends, your job, but

Please

And fall

I fall from the cliff edge

Down into an abyss of everything and nothing

My hands reach towards your soft sillouete

I fall farther

And grow closer

By heavens does your beauty have no bounds

A ravishing plethora of stars and sunsets

Embracing my eyes

Calling for my heart

I reach, shivering at the slightest touch

And I fall

Falls upon ruddy cheeks

A Fixation

A heady drug

That turns my blood to white fire

You are

A sensation

That travels from the tip of my toes

To the roll of my eyes

Someone save me from this elation

Of your touch, voice, grin

You are my enemy

But i can’t help get on my knees

And beg, breathlessly

To be your eventuality

I will overdose on your essence

For

Your blazoned hair

Your rosy lips

Your blue-fire eyes

I can not love you

Your witty heart

Your steady crown

Your passionate soul

I could never love you

The beat of my heart could never match your’s

The will of my soul couldn’t bear your weight

The tar of my mind would blacken your youth

I can not love you, but

My lips dry and bleeding

I go through the day

A ghost, there but not alive

I do not have friends

I do not have plans

I sit in my room all day, glued to the computer

More of a zombie than I have ever been

I am alone

Shaggy carpet, bare feet

Sitting against the bed, snacks abandoned

Barely a whisper between shoulders

As we play a game

Truth or dare?

Do you like me more than a friend?

I dare you to kiss me.

The stars are out, light glows from the lamp

Fresh nail polish, smeared makeup

Soft pajamas, quiet house

Blankets out of reach, drinks on the dresser

Shy, careful touches,

A breath shared

Morning wakes, the house sleeps in

Large comforter haphazardly thrown

The room shivers, two are intertwined

Eyes meet, warmth sparks

And look away, with a gut full of sharp flames

Is the moment you know

My heart cannot handle this pain

You are divine

You make my soul sing loud

I wish to dance

And if a chance

To hold you close a while

I look to you

And see its true

I have fallen even more

But I’ll be concise

And pay my price

As my love may be less than known

My heart turns

And certainly yearns

For -

You strike me a-lone

As I stand here by the shore

I hold my breath

And take a-step