Vampire Trash

#if you wanna be my lover #you gotta let me protect (inject) you

And Caroline is worried Stefan will hate her. And he says he doesn't but "that doesn't mean I don't hate the way you handled things" and ... I don't know.

I hope you don't mind me highlighting your tags but I thought this was a really interesting and astute post and wanted to jump in!

Yeah, this whole plot line is incredibly sad when you think about it. I really enjoy the no-humanity arc, I think it's entertaining and meaningful and exciting and great character exploration, but it's also tragic, which is kind of the point.

It's a recurring theme in their relationship: they are both control freaks and perfectionists and they apply that to their relationship, but they never get what they want. This is the most egregious example but it happens again and again. Stefan "want[ed] it to be perfect" [6x19] if he was going to start a relationship with Caroline, but it didn't happen the way he wanted. In 7x05 and 7x11 they try and go on this super fancy perfect romantic date and neither time does it work out. He writes "I wish things were different" in his letter in 7x18. In 8x03, 8x15 and the deleted scene in 8x16 he talks about current events not being "how [he] wanted to spend" the first day of their engagement / the first day of being re-engaged / their wedding night. Ultimately they never really got any time together at all - Bonnie and Enzo at least got "three glorious years of love" [7x21] before his death.

The lines you mention are heartbreaking: I find myself particularly affected by his "please stop" in 6x19, and the fact that she immediately realises what's up and teases him for not "want[ing] to take advantage of [her]" [6x19]. Even the way he responds when she kisses him in 7x01 is really gentle and hesitant. That seems to have gone out of the window by 7x04 though lol.

I also think you're right that Stefan would struggle to understand himself in the 'victim' role (he was always on the verge of getting it re: Katherine). He'd be focussed on beating himself up for letting it happen (and from what we saw in 6x17, even other than the NH circumstances, I imagine it probably happened in a... way that's not what he would have wanted) and would have struggled to process its impact on him. It would have been interesting to see that explored.

He doesn't really have friends. Yes, he IS part of the friend group, but other characters aren't exactly friendly nor enjoying his company

Like, if he was to leave bcs no humanity elena is poking emotional sticks into him, no one would miss him

The scene at the graduation, when he's being pulled into a hug is nice, but it does feel out of place. He's not close to the whole group

And this is the man who went to protests, who drove an ambulance during the war, who weny to HS 17 times. Who DOES THAT?!

S5 has no one miss him, has him freshly traumatised out of the coffin, and we get like... idk, one or two mentions of worry? He gets kidnapped by Tessa and people don't seem all that bothered, outside Elena, who's reaction is chalked up to jealousy

From then, he proceeds to be tortured MULTIPLE TIMES, and only has Caroline to comfort him. Not Damon or Elena, who supposed care about him, and none of the other cast whose lives he saved multiple times. Hell, we he saver Matt directly like 3 times, ( and technically screwed his relationships because of that) and Matt seems to only care when Stefan is in his line of sight. If at all. Both S4 and S5 i was there like " just LEAVE, mate, no one will notice "

S6 is its own brand of fucked up, because people are actively hounding Stefan for trying to move on. Yes, no one got over and handled bonnie and damon dying properly, but thdy were at least dysfunctional together. Stefan was on " hell saving duty" all alone, on the road, and when he dared take a break Caroline and Enzo stormed his house like a home invasion with " How could you abandon our friends?"

Enzo kills his gf, Alaric blamed him for giving up and Caroline is pissed he's holding a grudge.

Yes, he was an asshole to fake the apology, but i feel like it was a a justified bit of dick behavior.

For all his brooding, he is not antisocial. He does very well in social settings, he charmed bonnie and her grandma back before everything started

The only close tie he has is Caroline, which is great, but also, not enough

And like.... his drowning comfort hallucinations are only of Damon and Elena. Not caroline - who jas objectively been a better friend

Even when Caroline is mad at him and not inviting him ti thanksgiving, she has Elena and Stefan has Damon and Alaric make fun of him and insisting he get together w Caroline to stop the in group drama, not because he cares. Damon gets an " she makes you a better person" and Stefan gets the " caroline is annoying, can you just date her and make her less annoying?"