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I’m always saying this 👆🏻💯

tumblr is the website for if you're just someone's weird sister

I don't remember finding fart jokes particularly funny even when I was a child.

Five year old me, watching a movie with fart jokes: "Oh, how gauche. They're pandering to the lowest common denominator."

My cow had a baby IF YOU CARE!!!!

one of those apocalyptic things that we have decided not to talk about is that straight guys do not wash their hands in the bathroom. its fucking crazy pills man.

Why is so much adult oriented 2d animation bastard ugly, do they know they don’t have to do that? The characters don’t have to projectile vomit all the time either, but maybe that’s asking too much

there seems to be a fundamental disagreement between microwave oven manufacturers and the producers of microwave meals over whether the customer should know the wattage of their microwave or if such details should be abstracted away from them

i wish my brain were not full of gludge. i would like to be using it & because of the gludge i cannot do that.

isn't it so crazy that 51 is divisible by 17. because 51 is such an ugly number that based on vibes alone i would 100% think it's prime 😭😭 like who in the world would even WANT to divide that shit? 17 and 3 i fucking guess...... 🤷

well im fucking the cursed amulet. so mind your business

"isnt that an unhealthy power dynamic" no its a sex thing "arent you and the amulet growing codependent" no its a sex thing "isnt the amulet sucking your life force" no its a sex thing. god forbid people have kinks.

who are the toronto maple leafs

white pikmin are my favorite kind of pikmin and it’s all cuz of that one gif