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my teeth were perfectly designed to tear abd rend the soft white flesh of the gentle beast known as the mozzarella

i like how all cats regardless of species can either look rlly badass and cool or just incredibly silly stupid

me in my brain me in my selfies

having a headache while hydrated is so unfair. you were supposed to protect me.

Waking up from a nap and still having a headache is so unfair. You were supposed to save me.

still thinking about "I'll return to Ketterdam and to you. No mourners." "Wait for you by the window, always. No funerals." a full week later btw. in case you all were wondering how I'm doing

another heavy handed symbolism moment: my mom has a potted sunflower in the kitchen. because it is a sunflower, it keeps turning towards the light from the window. my mother keeps rotating it so it faces inward because she wants "to see its beautiful petals and have it really brighten up the space!" . the sunflower is visibly wilting .

are you going to tell her or

her masters degree is in biology

The other day my wife told me about this influencer who said she needed to go on ozempic so she could go from 130 lbs down to 115 and I really cannot stress the degree to which we have so COMPLETELY lost the plot with this glp1 shit. Like not only are people are going on this shit for purely cosmetic purposes, the cosmetic purposes are delusional. This is the kind of mindset that gives people eating disorders but now because you can get a prescription instead of having to starve yourself or enduce vomiting a big swath of the general public seems eager to go along with it. Body Positivity did not go fucking far enough because I am being so real when I say that fatphobia is more of a public health crisis than obesity has ever been

Body positivity was doomed to be coopted. We need fat liberation.

the thing about being nonbinary is that you really do start to forget that other people have such strict walls around what is and isn’t allowed for genders. i thought we all agreed that we made that up. could you climb out of the cave real quick and feel the sunshine for a minute.

Rocky and Grace had a lot of arguments at some point because Eridian scientists asked to dissect Grace once he dies to see if any parts of his body could advance medicine or teach them about biology and Grace is all for it but Rocky’s like “NO??? NO ONE ALLOWED DEFACE GRACE BODY AFTER DIE??? WILL HAVE TO GO THROUGH ME???”

it is a truth universally acknowledged that having fun isn't hard when you've got a library card