I feel like I can’t tell anyone. I don’t wanna be a bother. Maybe I am.

But don’t worry, nothing will happen. I have myself.

Even though it’s very tiring and hurts so much, I will get through it. Like I always do. Though it feels more lonely this time maybe because I have more people around and I still feel lonely. So fucking lonely.

I literally have her lying next to me snoring, I went to the rooftop cried my heart out, all the sadness in the fucking cold. Contemplated life, obviously I want gonna do it but damn that it felt like an option for a second. Came back to more snoring. Let’s talk about fucking loneliness.

I could easily kill myself and she wouldn’t find out about it til next morning because I couldn’t wake her up to help me when I felt so desperate.