bad news guys :(
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bad news guys :(

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Not all venom fans are monster fuckers 😞 some of us are just aroace disasters who like the idea of a platonic soulmate who likes to murder annoying people for you, is that so bad?
Guys I’m part of the club 🥺
monsterqueerplatonic
Aces are welcomed and are valued members in the monsterfucker community.
Whoever does the little popups on Dungeon Masters, please know I love and appreciate you dearly.
(First is campaign 1, episode 8, the others are all campaign 2, episodes two, four, four again, and six.)
Tim Downie saying, "It's wizard time motherfucker, Fireball."
i'm actually curious, what trinkets do you guys have on your keychains? 🗝️

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very important for elf characters to freak the fuck out about the aging difference thing and pre-grieve like crazy and scream themself hoarse with denial when they can’t stop death itself and they still look the same as when they met the frail aged body that’s going cold beneath their touch and eventually settle into a numbness that they’ll call acceptance but they never really let anyone get as close as they did in the first century of their life unless they know they’re going to stick around as long as they will
“why are elves so snobby and exclusive and cut-off from everyone else” befriending you means they’ll end up burying you and your children and your grandchildren and they’ll still be young. exactly how many times do you think you could choose to do that. if you live through enough centuries, eventually you run out of days in the year to visit each grave.
I see your argument, but I raise you humans who keep dogs/ferrets, and even worse, rats. To be mortal is to love and lose. The elves ARE being snobby if this is their reasoning.
Are they?
Can you tell me, in truth and in honesty, that every single one of those beloved rats, every single fleeting caring clever wonderful bond you had with them...
Is as deeply traumatic to you as losing a parent, a child, a best friend?
Can you look me in the eyes and say, honestly, that those beautiful, brief lives that altered yours for 5 wonderful years means as much to you as the people who kept you alive for the decades necessary to even begin caretaking your pets?
Maybe you can! That's wonderful!
Now can you do it again. And again. Hundreds of times. Can you hold that 5 years in your conscious mind 40 years later with the same depth and detail as the living people around you who have continued changing with you since?
Maybe yes! Spectacular!
How long until you confuse one dead rat for another that looked and acted so similarly?
How long until each dead rat is a blurry smear interchangeable with the hundreds of others?
How long until you confuse a live rat with a dead one?
How long until your human companion realizes you think of them as a FUCKING PET and rightfully slits your throat?
Yeah this isn't losing a fucking pet. This is the friend you knew from birth who died senselessly at 22 and you didn't. Which you knew he would, because he's been sick since you were kids -- hell, he came to terms with it eight whole years before he died he'd been living with it so long.
Practically a third of his entire life he was at peace with it while you sit here 15 years later, 15 years older, sobbing because you are only now experiencing a media that came out a decade after he died, but that you know you would have enjoyed with him had still been alive because he wouldn't have left you any choice. And it makes you sick that he's gone instead.
But it's not one friend who got sick. It's not anything to do with sickness or chance. It's an inevitability for the entire species that each and every one of them will only ever be given just enough time to experience the joy of Growing and be denied a fraction of the chance you have to enjoy it.
An elf teaching at any human institution eventually has to ask themself, "how many more entire classes of my children do I want bury?" Or else they need to stop seeing their students as full and equal people and just think of them like pets.
nasa is using a 3D world graphic for the solar eclipse thingy today where germany is still devided in east and west adjfglkafdhgadfg. buddies, it's been almost 40 years.
So I showed this to a physicist and they were like "Oh! Yes! It's a figure from Fred Espenak's very old paper where he did a bunch of eclipse graphics! I've been looking at these my entire internet life, basically, for every solar eclipse! They called him Mr. Eclipse. He just passed away recently 🥺"
Anyway apparently Mr. Eclipse made 5000 years' worth of solar eclipse graphics, which you can find the simpler versions of here
So now instead of laughing at NASA for their outdated graphics I'm emotional about Mr. Eclipse and his hard work
TIL that the back of the fridge gets cold enough to freeze cans of delicious Gummy Snake-flavoured energy drinks! …TIL that cans of delicious Gummy Snake-flavoured energy drinks rupture when frozen. Pensive emoji.
Edit: ...Oh that cooling vent.
I used to really like the ✨ emoji but now she's best friends with AI and I feel like I can't trust her anymore
✨✨they✨✨can't ✨✨have✨✨her✨✨
CAN'T STOP WON'T STOP. Sapphira rounds out the campaign 2 quartet, our bestie/worstie Lividity doesn't have a matching graphic (also, hilariously, is Wesley's twin sister), and Lavender is *Communism Bugs Bunny voice* OUR daughter.
Yeah Eloin and Zora are coming next. Depending on how I feel about her by the end of the season, maybe Rabia too XD;;

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The worst characters are the ones were you only get like three pieces of lore about them but the lore is so fascinating and hits your brain at just the right angle to have you behaving like a feral dog in front of your conspiracy theory cork board
Who would win
Miss Piggy
Angel from Buffy
It seems like we're just feeding characters to Miss Piggy at this point
The X-Files + Scully’s Darkness Falls Jacket
(source)
Still my favorite X-Files post on this whole damn site.
I got an e-mail from my son's school saying they have "become aware of a proposed student walkout on Thursday 13 August associated with the “Students Say No to Hanson” event, protesting Pauline Hanson and One Nation" and that "the proposed walkout is not supported or endorsed by me (the principal) or by school staff." They also recommended that "families discuss... with their children before Thursday" so I texted my kid about it, he didn't know it was happening and wasn't fully aware of who Pauline Hanson was, but now he knows, and is mad as hell, and is absolutely talking part in the walkout tomorrow lol Can't even rely on schools to do the woke indoctrination anymore, I have to do it all myself smh
Liveblogging Dungeon Masters campaign 2, episode 6 - Duke of the Dunes!
Having so much preshow fun in the chat. I love the live chat.
Oh my god sickly baby spirit dragon wyrmling from Evermeet. Cadmus, you're now a father. They're from places like Myth Drannor and Netheril, too.
Misfit the spirit dragon wyrmling! Sailor: "Look at that little misfit…" Cadmus "That's its name. Misfit."
Uncle Sailor!!
Cadmus: "Hi Mom, nearly died, Misfits saved me, found a dragon, I understand you more than ever. Love you guys. Sailor says hi." Cadmus' Mum: "Like attracts like. I raised a dragon."
@wingsy-keeper-of-songs has the amazing suggestion that maybe she's being literal, and Cadmus is actually a Draconic Sorcerer? He does have a lot of Fire-based spells, and the very first spell we see him cast? Alter Self.
Li'l P and Sailor are so fun together <3
Cadmus: "How do you guys know each other?" Rabia: "We've lain with each other, if you must know." Neil: "As I'm taking some water, I just *SPITTAKE*"
Sailor is not having this lover's tiff between Sapphira and Rabia.
Rabia is infodumping. The Phaerimm made the Anauroch, attracted by the giant catastrophic magic nuclear accident that was the Fall of Netheril. The barrier is there to stop them from eating all of Faerun.
Sapphira was abandoned as a baby by her parents. I'm her parents now.
Jasmine/Rabia: "She takes all of your money, counts it out slowly, puts it in her bag. 'You know, if you do end up saving the world, and you don't die in the process, you can't be mad if I come looking for you. You'd be a very easy target to rob, I think.'" Sapphira: "I would be disappointed if you didn't." Jasmine/Rabia: "And it's almost as if it hurts her to say it: 'Hope you don't die out there.'" Mayanna: *smiles* Rabia: "…But also if you do it'll be your own fault because you're completely incompetent and an idiot."
Sailor: "You know, I don't know what's going on between y'all, but that lady is too big for her britches and then some." Sapphira: "She's a survivor, and I think that does something to you out here." Sailor: "Maybe. You might wanna cast one of them spells over your heart for a while."
Thank you, Joseph, your understanding of the situation is… very interesting :')
Joseph. Are you still naked.
Li'l P: "I actually can't read." Jasmine: *LOUD SILENCE* Sailor: "…All this time you've been pretending you can read." Li'l P: "I haven't been pretending :)"
Reduced Li'l P in Joseph's lap :')
Joseph: "THE FLUMPH!" Li'l P: "…The what?" Joseph: "Your future!" Li'l P: "…blank face." Joseph: "…The blank mind is a pure canvas :')" Sapphira: "I'm sure they say that in your order :')"
Li'l P to Joseph: "- and you seem like a powerful……….. wizard?"
Cadmus: "You came back and helped me, we're friends." Joseph: "…Oh. I don't think I've ever had one of those." Li'l P: "I'd like to climb on your back and give you a hug." Mayanna: "The way she hugs is so stressful."
Li'l P has a +3 to INT and she is refusing to use it. Love that for her.
Sailor and Li'l P specifically asked for Sapphira to be reassigned to a different team?? Sapphira is distraught, Li'l P is lying badly and obviously, but gets sincere and says she maybe thought Sapphira wasn't a good match but she really likes her now! She's really powerful! Also it was Sailor's decision!
Given that Sailor has been in Ninth Quill for so long, and fairly prominently given how friendly he is with Cadmus' mother, I wonder if Sailor knew Sapphira's reputation and faltering magic, and wanted to keep her out of the Anauroch to protect her? He knows how dangerous it is out there, more than any of the others, and he doesn't want to lose anyone else.
Sailor's Windskiff is completely destroyed ;_; It's been his since he was a kid.
Full scene because Neil and his teary eyes ripped my heart out again:
Cadmus: "Who's this belong to?" Sailor: "S'one of my siblings. But, uh… well, she and me used to kick up the dust somethin' rotten across the sand dunes. And you kinda remind me a li'l bit of her, so, uh - I thought, y'know, you've been away from your Mom and that, well, just thought it might bring you some luck, y'know?" Gnarly: "…I don't feel like that was yours to give away." Cadmus: *wordlessly offers the wristband to Gnarly* Jasmine/Gnarly: "She takes it from you. 'I think she's kinda tired about with everyone talkin' about her like she's dead.'" Sailor: "You know I'm kinda tired about not being able to make amends for what - what I've done. You don't think I've tried? You know how long I've been out here?" Gnarly: "That's not how you make amends. You don't make amends by runnin'. You make amends by staying and looking at what you've done. Hell, you're still runnin'!" Sailor: "I like to think of it as exile. Right? The black sheep of the family? Well, that's me!" Gnarly: "You know I never felt that way about you." Sailor: "Didn't you? 'Cause, you know… just got to feelin' after that that maybe… maybe it's safer for people not to be around me so much." Jasmine/Gnarly: "Gnarly looks at the shattered remains, picks the sail from it, the only salvageable part, and as you walk away, she just said, 'So I'm just supposed to stick around and fix your mess again? Is that my job now?'" Neil: "Sailor kicks a rock and almost stumbles a little bit, stops, and just carries on walking." Gnarly/Jasmine: "'Some things that are broken - well, maybe they should just stay broken.' And she angrily takes the sail and flies up."
Betsy is back in working order. Gnarly and the Windskiff are gone.
Me in chat: "Can we crowdfund to give Sailor a hug?" Cadmus, like twenty seconds later: *gives Sailor a hug*
Cadmus: "When we're done, if we survive all this… can I spend some time out here with you, learning how to surf the sand?" Sailor: "Hell yeah." Cadmus: "I'd love to… weave the wind?" Sailor, softening: "Weave upon the wind."
<3
Hey, that 1 HP from Mending might just help!
Cadmus, handing a bottle to Li'l P: "This is really good rum - *whispers* I stole it from my Dad."
LADS LADS LADS.
Rabia left a gift for Sapphira - a magic dagger that compels the target to name itself. Jasmine, rolling for side effects: "Oh… wow, that's kinky." For every hit, it gives her a harmless flash of pain, and now she's thinking more like Rabia / hearing her thoughts. Wow :')
Cadmus made a flag!! "MISFITS - and Young Joseph." Young Joseph has a sad. "Young Joseph is not cool, is not hip…"
Sailor is being a consent king, and Joseph is now a Misfit <3
Off into a fallen city of Netheril aboard the repaired Betsy!
Four-day journey onboard a smallish ship together, huh?
Man I hate it when gravity randomly reverses.
Dang, Sailor and Li'l P take thirty points of Psychic damage from a magic storm. On the other hand, they now all have telepathy?
Pink sparkle moss! Li'l P and Sapphira take Radiant damage and are blinded. Glitter moss!
Cadmus: "I shoot out a Fireball to dissipate it." Neil: "Firebolt or ball?" Christian, laughing: "Firebolt." Neil: "Just so we're all clear!" Christian: "I shoot a Fireball and we all die."
Oh god figure cloaked in red who's been following them the whole time… and episode end!

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Solid life advice from Sue the T. Rex.
CR4E11 : Make Merry