To Those Whom I Have Hurt
Hello, my name is Ryanti Veansyus.
It has come to my attention that my behavior, actions, and dialogues have brought significant harm to the members of the Final Fantasy XIV community. This is my official response to the previous and current on-going discussions.
Words cannot describe the sheer magnitude of my regrets and remorse for what has happened and what I have done. I was unaware of the impact that my mannerisms had online towards other individuals and I’ve learned to look extremely hard at myself; both inside and out. For it to take this long to have reached this realization, I am extremely apologetic to the community as a whole.
I accept that I have made significant mistakes in my social interactions. Mistakes that have caused long-term damage to other human beings that I never intended to harm. This is not okay and I am writing this to take responsibility and the accountability that came with my actions of the past.
I’m writing this statement to comprehensively apologize to those who I have hurt. Most importantly, I wish to explain my courses of action in order to make the appropriate amends.
Apologies:
Eiai, I thoroughly and deeply apologize for the inappropriate behavior that resulted in making you extremely uncomfortable. I apologize for the pressure I put on you with both my behavior and status in Equinox. I apologize for disregarding both your personal space and your boundaries during our rp sessions together. I apologize for the harm that this has caused you and deeply regret my actions. This was wrong and I am incredibly sorry for not noticing how this affected you.
Raih’ir, I would like to extend my deepest apologies to you for slandering you. I apologize for choosing to label you as clingy and impulsive. I would like to apologize for my piss poor communications after our RP interactions and being dismissive by dropping the ball on you. It was disrespectful and rude. That was wrong and I apologize for choosing to behave the way that I did and in such a way that it has resulted in long term harm to you. I am incredibly sorry for mistreating you. Nox, I want to apologize for forcing you to engage in inappropriate behaviors that left you feeling pressured and uncomfortable. From my status as an RP officer, I did not realize the weight of my actions and how I was making you feel. I apologize for my words and slander that I spread to others. I dehumanized you and I deeply apologize for the pain and torment that I have caused you as a result of the actions I made. It was wrong and I am truly sorry. Lio, I would like to thoroughly and deeply apologize to you for the inappropriate behavior I engaged in towards you, too. This includes being two-faced, engaging in bigotry, and slandering you. I apologize for the way I’ve treated you as a human being. I ended up trampling upon your beliefs and values and betraying your trust. I was ignorant and I apologize for my past insincerity. I was stubborn in being unable to recognize my wrongdoings and mistakes and took you for granted. Sounsyy, please allow me to apologize for making you uncomfortable during the times we interacted. I’m sorry for putting you on a pedestal and glorifying you to such lengths that made you incredibly uncomfortable. I never meant to come across that way and now that I am aware, I’m truly sorry for my inappropriate behavior. Rei, I would like to thoroughly apologize to Rei/Ishra/Zhi for choosing to engage in behavior that caused discomfort. I violated your boundaries and feelings in the conversations that we had. I treated you poorly when you were in a dark place in life and unknowingly attributed even more to that. I apologize for not contacting you in the ICU. I was selfish by trying to distance myself from you in order to prioritize my own mental state during that time. I regret this immensely and I am truly sorry that I wasn’t there for you. I don’t know how to apologize enough for this fuck up. -- I wish to apologize for the instances in which I made derogatory comments towards women. In turn, I came across as demeaning and dismissive. The statements that I made were both heinous and wrong. I deeply apologize to all the women that I offended. The Transgender Community, please accept my apologies for the derogatory comments/statements that I had made about people who identify as transgender in the past. These were harsh, ignorant, and bigoted comments that dehumanized people who were different than me because of my own fundamental bias. That was not okay and I am very, very sorry to all of those who I’ve hurt with my words and beliefs. Equinox, I’m sorry for the inappropriate behavior during my time as a standing officer in the Free Company. I apologize for my actions and behavior that took place that negatively impacted the atmosphere as a whole. I betrayed the trust of everyone and let everyone down. I am very sorry. Gold and Glory, I’m sorry for any of the negative and harmful behavior that I engaged in. I would like to apologize for any of my inappropriate behaviors that may have caused harm to anyone involved. I apologize for my negative impact towards the image and reputation of G&G. I let you all down. I am deeply, deeply sorry for this. The Final Fantasy XIV Community, I thoroughly and deeply apologize for the harm that I have inflicted to the members of the Final Fantasy XIV community through my actions listed above. I apologize for the harmful/inappropriate behavior, the ignorance of my actions, disrespecting of boundaries, and my attitude towards others. I’m sorry. This apology extends to former friends, friends, RP partners, acquaintances, and more. I’m sorry for my actions. However, I know that there needs to be more than just words and apologies. __ I want to address the path I’m taking to move forward and to better myself. Please allow me to explain and show that I’m sincere. I cannot change the past. What happened has happened and cannot be unraveled. But I do have control of my future and what I choose to do now and I’m fully prepared to be held accountable for any actions that I’ll make now and going forward. As of right now, I am taking significant life-changing steps towards correcting myself. In the past, I wallowed in my depression without wanting to push myself forward. As a result, I normalized my negative attitudes to myself and others. I took the support of my friends for granted and treated them terribly. To start, I have already begun to take the steps to both seek and engage in professional help. I previously burdened my friends with the weight of my depression and toxicity without holding myself accountable. But that will change. I will change. I will strive to better myself as a human being and continue growing as a person. And until I can truly show that I am working on myself and improving, I will be stepping away from the community. I am not asking for forgiveness from the community that I have wronged but I hope to explain myself and convey my sincere feelings. My door is always open for those that I have wronged; whether for closure or amends. They don’t have to do so but my door will always be open. Thank you for reading my statement and again, I am truly sorry and wish to make things right.















