Ry@n

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over the past fifteen years, you have worked hard to make a name for yourself. you built your image from the ground up, something that paid off after you graduated from college. you had a following, sponsorships, a long-term boyfriend—you had it all. 

you and your boyfriend had been together for about seven years. you met at a bar in manhattan. he was handsome and a smooth talker. you two complimented each other so well. 

he was a rookie athlete when you met him. you were with him through his slumps and through his mvp seasons. the cameras loved to find you at his events.

it’s how you gained your status of the people’s princess within the world you both operated in. 

you were certain he was going to propose soon. especially because he had just signed an extension with a hefty bonus. the tabloids thought so too. they predicted that you two would be the next big couple to get engaged. 

so when you walked in on said boyfriend in bed with another girl, you tossed his shit from the balcony of your high rise apartment in brooklyn. you kicked them both out, tears spilling from your eyes. 

of course, word got around.

gossip pages spread rumors and shared pictures—your phone was always buzzing with something new. your comments and messages were blowing up. 

you needed to escape the noise. 

as if the universe heard you, you received a letter in the mail. it was an invitation. north high school was holding their annual reunion, and it was your graduating class’ turn. 

you bought a ticket for the first plane back. this was your chance to forget about everything that was happening in your life. you called your parents, and they happily agreed to pick you up at the airport when your plane landed. 

being back in town brought back feelings you had buried long ago. you watched the neighborhood you once called home pass you by from the passenger seat of your dad’s car. 

“we missed you so much,” he said, referring to himself and your mom. you rolled your eyes but a smile made its way to your face. 

“dad,” you laughed. “you just saw me months ago.”

it was true. it wasn’t like you never saw your parents, you flew them to new york often. you just never came back home. 

partially, you didn’t want anyone to know about the small town you hailed from. you didn’t want anyone to harass your parents, old friends, neighbors, or your ex. 

speaking of your ex, you also didn’t want to face him. that was the main reason why you never came back. 

you would never admit it, not even to yourself, but you were still in love with reese wilkerson. you never truly moved on. 

you had your entire future planned with him. you were supposed to get married, start a family, grow old and die together.

when you both graduated, however, he refused to come with you. you had enrolled in a university in new york, finally getting away from the small town. you tearfully begged for reese to come with you. but he couldn’t handle the change.

he didn’t want to grow up. 

so he called it quits. you haven’t heard from him since. 

you always thought about him, even if you didn’t realize it. 

you always noticed that your (now ex) boyfriend never kissed you with the same love, he never reached those same spots inside of you, he never cared about you in the same way—the list could go on forever. 

you didn’t know if it was because reese was your first love—your first everything for that matter—or if he just set the bar extremely high. either way, you subconsciously missed him and the way he treated you. 

you almost didn’t recognize the wilkerson’s house when you passed by it. it looked peaceful. 

“do they still live there?” you asked softly, swallowing the lump that formed in your throat. 

“yup,” your dad confirmed. “most of the kids moved out, only kelly lives there now.”

you turned your head towards your dad with your brows furrowed. 

“kelly?” you asked. 

“oh, you didn’t hear?” your dad said. “lois had another kid. the name’s kelly. i think they’re binary or something.”

you laughed at your dad’s attempt at explaining kelly’s gender preference. you knew he meant well. 

“non-binary,” you corrected. 

“lois tried explaining it to me one day, but i wasn’t really paying too much attention. your boyfriend was on the tv. it was an exciting game,” he explained. your heart sank at his words. 

right, you had to tell your parents that you were now single. your parents loved him. 

the distance between the wilkerson house and your parents house was short, and you were home within minutes. inside, your mom gave you a tight hug, holding you close to her. she kissed your head.

“how are you,” she said, her smile taking up half of her face. 

“i’m good,” you said, placing your bags by your feet. you looked between her and your dad. they were both so happy to have you back home. 

“i need to tell you guys something,” you admitted. you recounted the past couple of weeks to your parents. you even told them about how you threw his things off of the balcony and into the street. 

once you were finished, you studied your parents’ blank stares. 

“oh sweetie,” your mom said. “you should’ve done way worse than just throw his stuff out.”

your dad nodded along. 

“at least key his car or something,” he joked. you smiled at them, feeling truly at peace for the first time in weeks. 

you tried to keep a low profile while back in town, praying that no one would recognize you. and thankfully, not many people did. a couple of kids did, knowing you from watching their favorite player on tv, but they were respectful considering the situation. 

while inside the local grocery store however, someone recognized you but in a different way. it was lois wilkerson, your ex boyfriend’s mother. she called out your name excitedly. 

“oh my gosh, it’s been years,” she said, rushing over to give you a hug. you always loved lois, she was one of the sweetest women you knew. “how are you?”

“i’ve been good,” you smiled at her. “how about yourself?”

“kids have kept me busy, but i’m doing well,” she replied with a bright grin. you two carried on a friendly conversation for a few minutes before she excused herself to finish her shopping. 

she was so nice you almost forgot that the reunion was later that night. 

you were sat in front of your old vanity in your childhood bedroom, applying the finishing touches to your makeup.

it felt odd.

when looking in the mirror, you were still the same old girl who was weird in school. the same girl who dreamed of escaping the small town in exchange for the big city, the same girl who was looked down on by the other kids. 

you didn’t really change.

you still had your old pictures on your mirror. there were polaroids of you and your friends at prom, holding each other close with large smiles. those were the girls who you swore would be with you forever, but now you haven’t spoken to them in years.

nothing bad happened, you just got busy.

you also still had all your pictures with reese. you never got rid of any of his stuff. you still had old hoodies, old valentine’s day cards, handpassed notes from class, and plenty more stuff hidden away in your closet. 

you missed him.

for the first time in fifteen years, you were letting yourself admit that you missed reese wilkerson. 

before you could tear up and get too emotional about your old relationships, you decided to check your phone. your comments were flooded—even more so than the last time you checked. 

“he sucks anyway.” “i know a guy if you need a new boyfriend.” “he’s not even worth his mvp from last season :/ it was a fluke.” “will miss seeing you on the broadcast </3 you are my princess diana.”

you laughed to yourself at some of the comments, the positive ones at least. while reading, you noticed that you had to leave soon if you wanted to make it to the reunion on time, so you quickly ran down the stairs. 

you felt like a kid again: eagerly rushing in nice clothes and asking mom and dad to drive you to the high school for a party. 

north high had gone all out for the reunion. there were people arriving who you’ve never even seen before. everyone was so grown, walking in and greeting people like they had just seen them yesterday. 

you already felt incredibly out of place. it was like you never left. 

you nervously walked in, afraid that your heels were clacking too loud or the metal on your bag was making too much noise. you heard someone call your name from where food was being served. 

it was your old friends. they waved you over, huge smiles donning their faces. 

“we missed you so much,” alex said with a hug. 

“sorry we haven’t kept in touch. we’ve been so busy and you’ve been so…out there,” rebecca commented, looking at how much you’ve changed. 

“i should be the one apologizing,” you responded. 

the three of you—with wine glasses in hand—spent the next half an hour or so catching up.

alex broke up with the guy she dated throughout high school, instead marrying a man she met at college. she joked that her kid was waiting for her back at home, that kid being a small dog. 

rebecca on the other hand married her high school boyfriend. she told you that they had three kids, the youngest being born only a few months ago. 

when it came time for you to share, they tiptoed around the topic of a relationship. you instantly noticed it. 

“the whole world knows at this point, but i just recently got out of a long term relationship,” you said, half joking. 

“i would tune in to some of his games, but only to look out for you,” alex admitted. rebecca nodded along.

“he wasn’t very good at his job, all things considered,” rebecca added. while they were chatting about your ex, you spotted him out of the corner of your eye. 

reese wilkerson. 

you almost choked on the wine you were sipping. alex and rebecca looked to where your stare was and exchanged knowing glances with each other. 

“i heard reese is single,” alex commented, elbowing you slightly. 

“he did some work on our house,” rebecca said. “still a sweetheart, he and my husband hang out sometimes.”

you were half paying attention to their words, your gaze now fully on reese. he grew up. his face still looked the same, but it was more mature. you doubted his personality was any more mature, but who knew. 

he was taller, his shoulders broader, and he looked more muscular. his hair was still messily styled, and when he laughed at a joke someone made, he still had the same crinkles under his eyes. 

you were in such a trance, you didn’t notice rebecca sneaking off. alex snapped you out of it, asking if you were okay. 

“never been better,” you replied before finishing off the rest of your wine. alex dumped the rest of hers into a plastic plant in the corner without you noticing. 

“look, i’m empty too. i’ll get us refills,” she said, quickly grabbing your glass and rushing off. before you could process what happened, rebecca returned. behind her was reese. he didn’t notice you yet. 

“i think it was over here,” rebecca said, dramatically looking around the floor before looking at you. she gave you a look of mock surprise. 

“oh my god! look who it is,” she exclaimed. she turned to reese, who looked like he just saw a ghost. 

“i’ll let you two catch up. i think alex needs help,” she said, turning back to give you a smile before rushing off. 

you cursed them internally. the last thing you wanted to do was talk to reese. he looked you up and down, taking in your appearance. 

“you look,” he said, clearing his throat. “nice.” 

you nodded awkwardly. 

“yep. thanks, you too,” you said. 

“so,” he avoided looking into your eyes. “did you come here with anyone?”

“absolutely not,” you scoffed, remembering recent events. “you?”

reese shook his head no and laughed. 

“nah, haven’t really clicked with anyone,” he joked. “not since you.”

of course. while you were out building a future with a high paying athlete, reese never moved on. you felt guilty, despite the fact that he ended things with you. 

“so, new york,” reese continued, moving on from the awkward silence that filled the space between you two.

“yeah,” you nodded along. “it’s beautiful. you would’ve loved it.”

you mentally facepalmed at your last words. they came out of your mouth before your brain could even process them. 

but it was true, reese would’ve loved new york. almost every experience you had, you thought of him and how much he would’ve enjoyed it. reese just gave you a soft smile, chuckling lightly at your words. 

“yeah, i think i would’ve,” he responded. he stared into the drink he was holding, deep in thought. when he finally looked up at you again, you almost crumbled under his stare. he still looked at you the same way he did when you two were together.

“sorry about that guy, by the way,” he said. “he was ugly anyway.” 

you couldn’t help but let out a sharp laugh. 

“so you’ve seen. why did you ask if i came here with anyone if you knew?” you asked between laughter. reese smiled at you, his face going slightly pink. 

“was just making small talk,” he explained, taking a sip of his drink. 

“it’s funny,” he started, avoiding your eyes. “people use reaction gifs of him in my comments. i don’t think they know, but it’s a small world i guess.” 

you raised an eyebrow at him. 

“in your comments?” you asked. he nodded. 

“i run a kinda successful youtube channel where i post my dad doing stupid shit,” he explained, laughing to himself at the absurdity of the words leaving his mouth. “when i post an update on instagram, my comments are filled with him. he’s quite emotive. and popular.”

“i guess,” you shrugged. your ex was high profile, arguably the most famous athlete in his sport. you just didn’t realize his memes extended outside of that world. 

“he was very emotive when i kicked him out,” you joked, remembering the look on his face when you forced him outside in nothing but his boxers. reese laughed with you. 

“i saw the pictures,” he replied. 

“i think everyone did,” you sighed. reese noticed your change in attitude, of course he did. he would notice the slightest shift. 

if there was anything reese was good at, it was reading you. 

“look at us,” he said, stretching his arms out. “two losers who managed to make it big on the internet.”

you cracked a genuine smile, and reese truly felt his heart skip a beat. he missed seeing you happy, he missed seeing your smile in real life. 

he missed plenty of things about you. 

he tried to move on from you. every girl he was with was missing something though. they weren’t you. in fact, his last girlfriend broke up with him because he mumbled your name in his sleep. 

alex finally returned with filled wine glasses. 

“oh, reese,” alex exclaimed, handing you your drink with a knowing smile. “i didn’t know you were here.”

“i’ll leave you two alone, i’m sure you have plenty to catch up on,” she said with a wink before walking off to find rebecca again. you knew they had this planned out since they saw reese.

you were thankful for the topped up glass of wine, however. 

you and reese relocated after alex ran off. instead of awkwardly standing in the corner like a couple of weirdos, you two found an empty table to sit at.

your feet were killing you from standing in your heels for hours, you were incredibly grateful for the change of scenery. 

“you alright? you look upset,” reese commented, noticing the way you winced when you finally sat down and the soreness set in. 

“all good. my heels are killing me,” you answered. reese watched on as you leaned down to massage at your ankles, hoping for any sort of comfort. he wanted to reach out, to place a hand on your shoulder, as you tried to navigate through the pain. 

but he didn’t. 

instead, he sipped the whiskey that was in his glass, hoping the alcohol would soothe the burning ache in his heart. 

when you finally sat back up, your phone started going off like crazy. 

“i thought i put this thing on silent,” you muttered to yourself. the screen flashed with your ex-boyfriend’s name. you quickly declined the call before throwing your phone back in your bag. 

out of the corner of your eye, however, you noticed the girl who made your later high school years miserable. your eyes widened as you ducked into reese, burying your face into his shoulder. 

“what are you doing?” he asked, placing his hand awkwardly on your shoulder. the feeling of his skin against your own after all these years sent a jolt down your spine. 

“i just saw carmen,” you whispered. 

“say no more,” reese responded as carmen glanced over in your direction. 

“reese,” she exclaimed, a phony smile on her face. “how are you? who’s this?”

reese gently rubbed his hand along your shoulder blade. his touch was tender, full of love and adoration, it calmed you almost instantly. you wondered in that moment how he could still have this effect on you after fifteen years. 

“she’s my wife,” reese chuckled. “she’s pregnant right now and feeling a little sick.”

although he and carmen couldn't see you, your face had gone bright red at reese’s words. what he was using as an excuse used to be everything you ever wanted. 

“your ex-girlfriend—i don’t remember her name—but have you seen here? i wonder if the fame’s gone to her head,” she hummed. you felt reese’s grip tighten on you as he shrugged. 

“i haven’t seen her.”

“oh well. i hope your wife feels better,” carmen commented before walking away. reese removed his hand, the spot on your shoulder now feeling unusually cold. 

“she’s gone, you can come up now,” he said. you removed yourself from his side despite your heart telling you to stay. 

“you okay? i didn’t think you’d still have feelings that strong after fifteen years,” he asked, and it all came back to you like a flood. 

you slammed your locker door shut, the sound echoing down the halls. it was empty at north high school, save for you and a few other students.

you were waiting for reese, who of course found himself in detention that week. you always waited for him. you kept yourself busy with homework, sitting just outside the classroom he was locked inside. 

as you were scribbling down the answers to your history homework, carmen sat down next to you. you smiled at her, she was someone you saw as a friend. 

“hey. waiting for reese?” she asked. you nodded, finishing up the sentence you were writing. 

“yeah,” you smiled. “after this, we’re getting milkshakes.”

“that’s cute,” she said. she looked like she was deep in thought. 

“what’s wrong?” you asked. you cared about carmen, and you hated to see her upset. she shrugged in response. 

“i don’t know. things have been getting weird between me and george,” carmen sighed. she turned to look at you. “can i ask you something personal?”

“of course,” you nodded. 

“have you and reese ever gotten intimate?” she asked nervously. you looked at her, confusion in your eyes. 

“george and i want to take our relationship to the next level, but i’m scared,” she explained. “he keeps telling me that i have nothing to be worried about, but i want to hear it from a girl.”

you understood where she was coming from. so of course, you answered her honestly. 

“reese and i have sex all the time. it’s not as scary as you think,” you said. she nodded along, looking a little more relieved. 

“just make sure you wear protection. you don’t want to get pregnant,” you advised, elbowing her gently with a soft smile. she smiled back at you. 

“thanks,” carmen said, getting up from beside you. “i’ll see you later?”

you nodded, wishing her luck with her relationship and waving her goodbye. 

the next day, everyone in the halls stared at you like you had a goat’s head. they whispered as you passed, laughed when you looked confused, and some even pointed you out to their friends. 

it was only when you got to your locker did you realize why everyone was acting like that. 

a poster was taped to your locker. your school picture was crudely cut out and glued onto the paper. the words “slutty whore” were written in red under the photo. a caption beneath the label read “reese and i have sex all the time.”

you ripped the poster off of your locker, but the damage had already been done. as if it were a scene out of a movie, you turned around to see carmen laughing at you with her friends. 

you would later find out that she was only nice to you to gain your trust. her and her friends had planned that prank for months. the label followed you until you graduated. 

“i think i need to get some air,” you said, standing up. reese stood quickly, his hand finding its rightful spot on the small of your back.

he guided you outside, making sure to keep you away from carmen or any of her friends. once you felt the cool air hit your skin, you shakily let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. 

you both sat on the curb near the side of the building. you could still hear the sounds of music and chatter coming from inside, but you were far enough away that it wasn’t distracting. it was almost like you were kids again, ditching school parties for making out under the bleachers. 

except this time, there was no school party, the old bleachers were no longer there, and you and reese were no longer together. 

you shivered, the air finally starting to have an effect on you. without saying a word, reese shrugged off his suit jacket and draped it over your shoulders. you rested your head on his shoulder. 

“thank you,” you whispered. 

“for what?” he responded.

“for caring about me, even all these years later.”

reese sighed, his shoulders heaving with his breath. he gnawed on his bottom lip, trying to find the right words to say without ruining the moment. 

“i never stopped caring y’know,” he said. at this point, he didn’t care if he scared you away. he needed to say his piece, or else he would quite literally die. at least it felt that way. 

“for the past fifteen years, all i’ve thought about is you,” reese admitted. you sat up and looked at him. he was focused on the road in front of you two, refusing you meet your stare.

reese always looked handsome in the moonlight. whether that was when the moon reflected off the lake water and into his eyes, or when it shined on him as he stood outside your window in the middle of the night. 

and even in this moment, you couldn’t help but look at him the same way you did years ago. 

“the biggest mistake of my life was not coming with you,” he continued. “i always think about what my life would’ve been like if i just wasn’t so scared.”

he finally turned to meet your gaze, and you realized your faces were awfully close. his eyes flickered down to your lips. 

“i don’t expect you to feel the same, especially with how i ended things. but i still love you, and i always will,” he confessed. 

at that point, your heart moved before your brain did. you leaned in and placed a delicate kiss on reese’s lips. he kissed you back, almost deepening the kiss instantly.

he still kissed with the same fervent love as he did when he was younger. 

his lips still felt the same, but instead of tasting like dollar store soda, he tasted like the cheap whiskey they were serving at the reunion. 

when he pulled away from you, he rested his forehead against yours. 

“i’ve been thinking about that too,” reese joked. you smiled as your heart pounded against your chest. reese’s hand found yours, his thumb gently rubbing the skin. 

“do you maybe wanna come back to my apartment?” he asked. the question was quiet but filled with want.

it was filled with everything that has been unspoken for the last fifteen years. 

so you nodded. reese helped you stand and walked you to his car, his hand not leaving yours once. it was warm and familiar, something you have been searching for since you left town all those years ago. 

that night, you finally admitted to yourself that you still loved reese wilkerson, even all these years later.

and he loved you too. 

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