Running My Life

“A Star Is Born” Movie Review

A Star Is Born is the now third remake of the classic tale of musicianship, relationship, fame, and what it means to be true to yourself and others. Bradley Cooper stars as Jackson Maine, a famous country (?) musician who loves a good drink and occasionally a little something extra. While on the road, he walks into a drag bar where he hears the voice of Ally (Lady Gaga) bursting into a soul-melting rendition of “La Vie En Rose.” Believing that she really has the stuff to make into the music industry, he invites her out for a drink to tell her as much. The two bond over the course of the night, and that night becomes the starting point for their falling in love and making music together. Directed by Bradley Cooper and also starring Sam Elliot, Andrew Dice Clay, and (very briefly) Dave Chapelle, A Star Is Born is here to introduce us to 2018’s Oscar season. And when all is said and done, it’s bound to be in that nominations list itself.

We all saw the trailer for this movie when it first came out, and there wasn’t a single person I talked to who wasn’t just blown away by the staggering editing and musical poise that both Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga introduced us to, but luckily enough, Cooper also co-wrote and directed an entire movie past the points the trailer shows to put in theaters for us to see. This movie is a masterwork of character, music, and raw emotional drama. When I first heard about it, I wasn’t sure. I’m not the biggest fan of country music, and that seemed to be the vibe going in. But what’s truly refreshing about this remake of the classic tale is that it’s not necessarily about a country musician (though Cooper’s apparently immaculate voice does lend itself well to the genre), but rather that at its center, this is a film about addiction and the truths that we hide from. Frequently in this film, Cooper’s character talks about having something to say with music, and that it doesn’t matter how long you get to say it for or by what method you deliver your message, it only matters that you say what you have to say. Not only is this refreshing to hear this theme throughout the movie, Cooper weaves it into the narrative with such subtlety you’d barely know that on a metaphorical level, he’s referring to it not mattering that he’s remaking A Star Is Born, because he has something to say about fame and addiction, and how one often feeds into or leads into the other, or vice versa.

Bradley Cooper’s direction makes it seem like not only has he been involved in the movie industry for decades, he’s been directing motion pictures with Clint Eastwood levels of confidence for years, making the fact that this is his directorial debut all the more impressive. His direction is assured as he takes us through the struggles of both Jackson and Ally. We feel for both of these characters right away, and even in their worst moments, we never feel as if they’re bad people, just struggling people. That in itself is difficult to do with characters like Cooper’s who frequently turn to the bottle when they’re down or having problems. His relationship with Ally never suddenly turns abusive or negative; it’s only the bottle he abuses, but never her. In addition to this, Ally’s struggle with welcoming the fame that comes with being a pop musician in this day and age is nuanced and heartfelt, never devolving into a “pop isn’t real music” realization or anything of the sort. It truly is an astounding feat for Bradley Cooper to pull off, and might likely land him a Best Director nod at this year’s Oscars.

Of course for there to be sympathetic characters, a movie needs great performances, and boy, does this movie have those in spades. We knew Bradley Cooper was a great actor already from such things as Silver Linings Playbook, but this seems like a new level of performance even for him. Much of the reason that Jackson is a sympathetic character at all is due to Cooper’s natural ability to make whatever character he plays likable in some form, shape, or fashion. You feel for him when you’re meant to, and you cheer for him when you want to, and his chemistry with Lady Gaga is impeccable and unmistakable. And speaking of Oscar hopefuls, you better believe that both of them might end up there with their performances, because this might be one of the more impressive musician-turned-actress runs I’ve personally seen coming from Lady Gaga. The care that she brings to Ally, the confidence in her shyness, and the breakout moments all come from a place deep within herself that I didn’t know she could pull from, and she nearly steals the show when herself and Cooper share the screen together. Whether supporting or lead, Gaga makes the absolute most of what she’s given, as does every performer. Even Sam Elliot, Dave Chapelle, and Andrew Dice Clay (especially Clay) manage to make impressive turns when they don’t have to.

The music is also top-notch stuff. Aside from the instantly iconic “Shallow,” which both Cooper and Gaga perform as a duet, this movie boasts some of the best movie music since Sing Street. Every song is either toe-tapping, insanely fun, or packed with heart, and often all these aspect converge on each other during the truly show-stopping moments, of which, yes, “Shallow,” is one. I may not be a fan of country music, but I’m definitely a fan of whatever is in this fabulous picture.

In the end, I don’t have a lot to say about A Star Is Born other than that this is easily the most confident start to Oscar season in a few years, and Cooper’s directorial debut has set a pretty high bar to clear for the rest of awards season. The music is great, the performances are fantastic, and one leaves the theater immediately wanting even more despite the fairly long runtime. This is easily one of the best films of the year so far and I would highly recommend going out and seeing it as soon as you can. Get ready, Academy; the race has officially begun.

“That Arizona sky

Burnin’ in your eyes

You look at me and babe I wanna catch on fire

It’s buried in my soul

Like California gold

I was maybe 7, I think it was my first sleepover at someone else’s house. I don’t remember the girl’s name. But before I left Mum told me that if I was uncomfortable at any point, for any reason, even if it was in the middle of the night, I could call her.

She was very clear. She said even if her parents have gone to bed I want you to knock on their bedroom door and ask to use the phone. I could call her even if it was late. And if her parents didn’t answer the door to just go find the phone and call her anyway.

She said it doesn’t matter what time it is, you won’t be in trouble and I’ll come get you. 

I think I was being teased about something. It definitely wasn’t just I can’t sleep, there was something social going on. But that’s what I did.

The girl’s mom tried to discourage me. She said it was late, I said my mum didn’t care. She said I could sleep on the couch. I said I wanted to go home. She said I was upsetting her daughter, I said she was mean to me.

I remember holding the phone and my mum answered. I said “hi Mum.” She said “you want me to come get you?” I said “yes please.” She said “ask her Mum to help you pack up your things and get your coat on. I’ll be right there.”

And my mum showed up on her doorstep in pajama pants and a coat. The girl’s mum kept apologizing for me calling, my mum put up a hand and said “don’t apologize for my daughter. I want her to know she’s allowed to leave and I’ll be there for her at any time.”

I remember the little crowd of sleepover girls huddled in the far doorway that led to the bedrooms, watching all of this confused and silent. And I remember that mom apologizing. She didn’t seem to know what to say after my mum asked her to stop.

I had more incidents like that as I grew up. My mum did a lot around boundaries with me. I remember her marching me down the street to another girl’s house to ask for an apology in front of her parents.

I remember her telling 3 friends to sit in the front room with their bags packed while they waited for their parents to come get them, after I had told them all to “get out of my house” for teasing me and bullying me.

I remember her coaching me through a speech on how to resign and leave from a hostile work environment when I was in the middle of nowhere at a camp for the summer, and she offered money to get a cab to pick me and my friends up.

I can’t say I’ve always followed my gut on boundaries and discomfort. I can’t say I’ve never swallowed it in order to make others comfortable. But I can say what she taught me was important. It was and still is radical.

It’s radical to have boundaries. And to exercise them. Three things I think were really really important in what she did: 

1. She always explicitly said “you can leave if you want to.”

2. She never questioned why, or whether I was overreacting.

3. She showed up.

But I think a lot about the girl’s mum apologizing and how… that’s the norm, actually. What my mum taught me was radical, what that girl’s mum was teaching was the norm. “Just deal with it, don’t trouble anyone, go back to sleep, it’ll be over soon, don’t ruin it.”

And I still get that message from a lot of places. But my mum taught me that I’m allowed to leave.

I see what a privilege that is as an adult. For some people, for some situations, there is no way out. But sometimes, also, we don’t leave because we think we’re not allowed.

So, just in case no one ever told you (or you need a reminder): YOU ARE ALLOWED TO LEAVE.

You can leave a date, a party, a job, a meeting, a commitment. You are allowed. If you’re worried about keeping your word remember that your boundaries are also your word, your integrity.

I wanted to tell this story because the message to stay to make others comfortable is so pervasive, that without actively teaching me that I’m allowed to leave, that’s what I would’ve absorbed.

Hell, I absorbed a lot of it anyway. As an adult, at that camp job, I remember her on the phone saying “what do you want to do?” And not knowing, until she said “do you want to leave?” And I said “can I?” She said “You can always leave. What do you need so you can leave?”

So, if you’re a person like me, who was taught that you’re allowed to leave, keep an eye out for those who weren’t. They may need the reminder. They may need to hear that it’s okay. They may need help. And keep telling yourself that you are allowed. You’re allowed to leave.