Week 2, Tuesday (?) Journal
I used to keep track of the days. Ever since I got shot out of the sky, I haven't quite been able to piece together if it's the right day. Did I miss a day? I'm not sure. Everything at Mullins was measured, calm, orderly. Abel is the opposite. Abel is a splash of color and chaos where Mullins was...I don't want to say gray, but. I suppose it was. There were all sorts of people there, separated by military and non-military. I would say I was one of the civvies, but that wouldn't really be true. I'm not sure what, or who I am anymore.
No. I am Runner Five. It is comforting, to have that. Despite the fact that I have taken it from Sam Yao's dead love. It seemed like she was, in any case. He gave the number so easily. Perhaps he hoped to forget her. To move on. Runner Seven told me that they could have retired the number, would have if Sam had requested it. But he didn't. He gave it to me, a stranger he hadn't even seen yet. Why?
She Alice died so that I could be Runner Five. I will not let her down. I don't know why I'm here. No one knows me, or why I am here, why I came instead of food. Why I was so important. Why I was shot down. I do not have answers to give them. I will try to find answers.
