me: *emerges from the shower, red bc i like to boil in the shower*
someone: holy shit what happened??
me: lobster kin

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@ruimtetijd
me: *emerges from the shower, red bc i like to boil in the shower*
someone: holy shit what happened??
me: lobster kin

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being an executioner used to be an inherited job. imagine dealing with teen angst and also job shadowing your dad the town’s torturer
googling things isnt punk. poser
You can leave an apology in the replies whenever you're ready, idiot.
u/differentlifer

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we need to start legally protecting these like make this kind of bathroom part of the national park system
i am about to bestow upon you the secret butter technique. i am sorry, but it is french. i am sorry again, this only works with cow butter. i am certain plant based butters wouldn’t work, and alternative animal butters may or may not work
has this ever been you: you have a nicely steamed vegetable, or maybe you want to make the best butter noodles, but you know that if you put butter on those it’ll just melt and you end with kind of greasy noodles or vegetables? don’t you wish it was instead a luscious buttery glaze?
introducing: beurre monté
you will take a small sauce pan, and begin heating it with 1-2 tablespoons of water (use very little water) and bring it to a hard simmer or boil
turn the heat down slightly, and add Butter. how much? however much you dare. (start with 3-4 tablespoons and go from there)
you are going to either whisk Aggressively or you can pick up the saucepan, still holding it over the heat, and swirl aggressively so the butter is skating around the sides of the pan
done correctly, you will have liquid butter that is still emulsified. you have made Butter Sauce. season it with a little salt, and toss whatever you want in it.
if you’re butter splits, i’m sorry. you didn’t agitate it enough to maintain the emulsion, and now you have melted butter.
you can use this knowledge to make other sauces by swapping out the water for another liquid. white wine becomes beurre blanc. red wine is beurre rogue.
you want to CUM? sweat minced shallot in a tiny bit of butter, add white wine and cook it out until it’s reduced by about half. then whisk butter in hard. a few flecks of minced thyme or fennel frond stirred thru, and you eat that with a nice seared fish? or scallop? or even shrimp? wow. you will Nut
your boxed mac and cheese game can also be elevated by cooking your pasta and making a beurre monté first, tossing your pasta in that and adding the cheese packet. wow. hey; you’ll cum
go forth now with this butter secret
five notes?? this is why i don’t tell you all anything
Saw some older articles about Soldier F getting acquitted on pretty damn spurious grounds a few months back and feel it's important to remember his name is David Cleary.
the most annoying thing about asserting on this website that Ghosts Literally Aren't Real is that you get people in your notes arguing that really, if you were truly Scientifically Minded, you wouldn't reject the idea out of pocket just because of minor details like "there has literally never been recorded non-anecdotal evidence of one in over 6000 years of human history that wasn't obviously faked". after all, there are (unspecified) Things Science Still Can't Explain and (unspecified) Things Science Has Been Wrong About In The Past That Unscientific Bullshit Was Actually Right About (don't press me for examples on either of these categories), so really, the Scientific thing to do here would be to accept that actually you're even stupider than people who think their dead grandma is hiding their shit until she gets a Pepsi, and you have to take those people seriously or you are guilty of Hubris.
i can sit here and make snide quips at this strawman of a Rational Ghost Agnostic i whipped together in my garage ("nobody knows if ghosts are real or not :)"), but the root of the matter is: if you can't say "ghosts aren't real" with your entire chest without qualifiers or riders, then you can't assert literally anything about reality.
talking about ghosts and "spiritual experiences" in general is kind of tricky, because on the one hand, there's a lot of strictly anecdotal evidence for their existence, and if they aren't real, that would imply that literally every single piece of anecdotal evidence like that throughout recorded human history is actually evidence of people outright rejecting reality, the laws of physics and causality, and their own memories/experiences to fit a literally impossible narrative just because they want to believe it's true, which in turn would have extremely troubling implications for all theories and personal anecdotes in general. and on the other hand ghosts aren't fucking real and all those implications are true
like the central issue here is that you can say "ghosts aren't real" and someone will say "okay well my grandma's house has unexplained cold spots and people have heard voices there for decades after someone was murdered, are you saying that's just coincidence?". and responding with "yes + your grandma should check for gas leaks" is considered a more embarrassing thing to say than the thing it's responding to
never mind actually ghosts are real but only for this person's grandma

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JAR (Joel Arthur Rosenthal) sheep head hair clip
Pearl, sapphire, aluminum, silver, gold
I was making general TNG/DS9 memes but so many ended up being about Lwaxana that she just had to have her own post. Iconic. Love that for her.
I’m inventing. My Own sport where you have to throw a greased up horse as far as you can wihtout hurting it and the hrose has to consent
Riri why did you reblog this one eighty times
i was having a good day
I'm gonna get so much mileage out of this one
Martina McBride didn't win Country Music Association Song of the Year for a song about how burning your house down with your abusive husband still inside it is good, noble, and an allegory for the American Revolution for people to act like the genre belongs to bootlicking fucks
other things people didn't do for you to act like country music belongs to bootlicking fucks:
Garth Brooks winning video of the year at the ACMs for a song about how none of us are free as long as there's racism and homophobia
Reba McEntire charting with a gothic horror song about an innocent man being executed by an incompetent judge and a corrupt sheriff
Willie Nelson being, well, his entire self tbh
Dolly Parton recording the hating capitalism banger of all time
Kacey Musgraves telling everyone to ignore the haters, smoke weed, and be a bisexual slut
how the hell did I leave Morgan Wade off this list. wrote a song about being depressed, alcoholic, and suicidal and how mental illness stigma sucks, saw how much people connected with it, wrote a Part II of that song about how she's doing better now but you're never totally free of the risk of relapse. fucking icon.
I specifically curated this list so people couldn't be like "ah yes but you see here is my simple binary of good and bad country music which always works", I made sure to add different genders, eras, subgenres, etc and y'all are still pulling that shit in the tags!
listen. Alan Jackson, the archetypal mister big hat man sitting on a tractor singing about a pickup truck, wrote a shockingly normal song about 9/11 that was like "yeah I don't know jack shit about politics but my copy of the bible says we're supposed to love everyone" and then went on the radio and explained how he specifically wanted to write a song about that day that "wasn't vengeful". Miranda Lambert took the southern leftist slogan "y'all means all" and made it the title of a corny ass pop-country song for the Queer Eye soundtrack. Kenny Chesney stole a horse from a cop and Tim McGraw put the cop in a chokehold defending him, and I know that's not about their music but it is, and this is very important, fucking sick as hell
it's fine if you only listen to female country artists or pre-1990 country artists or whatever the fuck you want but stop acting like you've cracked the secret code to dividing a whole genre of art into good pure anti-establishment folk songs vs bad corrupted right-wing sellout pulp
updating this post for 2025:
Luke Combs covering Fast Car and keeping the line "I work in the market as a checkout girl" and doing an interview about how he couldn't change a single word because it's not his story. king shit
Morgan Wallen doing I Had Some Help, literally the first song that spoke to me as a male survivor of domestic abuse. also shoutout to the guy for getting caught saying a racial slur and responding by specifically telling his fans not to defend him and raising a bunch of money for the Black Music Action Coalition. bro had an engraved invitation to the culture war and said "nah I'd rather be normal"
Shaboozey just absolutely obliterating the drunk roadhouse anthem glass ceiling
Maren Morris and Brothers Osborne with a song that okay, released in 2019 but I didn't hear until recently, about how good friends mind their own business and let you love whoever you want and also get high with you when you're broke
Kimberley Perry! If I Die Young Part 2!! "actually I'm glad I lived, bitch" ass song that I bet is gonna mean a LOT to kids fighting depression
Kelsea Ballerini and Noah Kahan with Cowboys Cry Too. okay it's shallow and corny but genuinely a shallow and corny song about how men shouldn't be afraid to have feelings is what a lot of men need
bringing the full version of this post back around because people are pissing me off today

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I’ve made this post like six times but it still fucks me up the China’s mountains just look like that. Like I spent decades thinking it was stylistic but no, they just have different mountains over there.
For reference, here’s what my local mountains look like:
Here’s the general art style Chinese mountains are drawn in:
And here’s how some of them actually look:
What the FUCK
I’m specifically reblogging this here because I know there is a geological reason for this and I know at least one of you has to know it.
thank you
when i lived in england i literally thought i was asexual bc i was so grossed out by everyone
this is so fucking funny. real as hell