꒰ঌ love me till hell freezes over ໒꒱

trying to interact with people who already have a close circle is literally just this

stop using ai to add simple ass colorful stars to your images and do it your fucking self

i always get so h♡rny on my period and it pisses me off so badly bcos i can’t even do anything abt it

living day by day being called the wrong name. looking in the mirror and seeing the wrong body. talking to people and getting called delusional for literally just being you, and having your spirit. seeing people who are fans of you in a past life, yet won't even treat you like you are now, wanting to get onto your knees and cry with agony, just begging them, begging them to acknowledge the fact that you are you, just to be hit with another empty compliment, as if they're talking to someone entirely different. not being able to figure out why you were so liked in the past, yet now, everyone treats you like a different person. not being able to figure out why the people from your past life aren't here anymore, not being able to figure out why your body is the wrong one for you, or why everybody seeks to call you delusional at every turn. not being able to figure out why everyone thinks that you're dead.

i'm not dead.

i'm right here.

莫承威 — THE PSYCHIATRIST’S ASK GAME

8 questions • 8 statements — iryoukawa’s 100 follower special

abulia ; how strong is your will when it comes to getting things you want? are you aggressive about your wants and desires, or are you open to negotiation and guidance?

comorbidity ; would u prefer your darling predictable or unpredictable? do you feel as if your love must follow a script?

fixations ; do you have a strong set of internal rules or morals? why do you follow them? do you tend to be hypocritical with your beliefs?

extracampine ; would you rather hide your vulnerable and shameful parts from your darling, or do you demand that your darling accept them? do you acknowledge your darling’s flaws, if any?

amygdala ; are you the type to fight, flee, freeze, or fawn in the face of a problem? in your experience, does it ever help the situation, or does it worsen it?

catatonia ; do material possessions matter to you? what kind of gifts do you appreciate the most? what gift would you like to recieve from your darling?

metonymy ; do you value other people’s perception of you? do you ever feel as if you are playing a persona, whether in real life or on here? if so, why do you think you keep it up?

anosognosia ; what does your devotion to your darling truly stem from? what do you think you are in search for, when you think about pursuing your darling?

apparition ; i want to examine every inch of you. (/r or /p)

phantom ; i’d let you open me up on a surgical table. (/r or /p)

spirit ; i want to harm those who harm you.

seven days ; i’d wait an eternity just for you to notice me.

funeral service ; i want to swallow you whole and keep you to myself. (/r or /p)

xiehouyu ; i want to bring you down with me. (/r or /p)

yanyu ; i’m afraid that you dislike me.

mister mushroom ; i want to interact with you more, but i’m too shy.

i try to be kind, but in reality i am so.. selfish.. i don’t know what to call these feelings..

my friends, the people i love.. i want to be the only one in their lives.. i want them to depend on me like i depend on them.. i want them to need me, to ugly cry when i’m not around, to always have me in their head, just like i do..

i want them all to myself.. they don’t need other friends, lovers, families—they don’t need anyone but me.. anything that takes away their attention from me should be squashed like a bug.. i wouldn’t care how much it would hurt in the moment, as long as they care and love me, that’s all that matters.. all of their thoughts and happiness should be because of me.. i should be the only thing making them happy, no one else matters.. leave everyone and everything for me, i’d eliminate anything if it got in your way of being happy.. i don’t care who’s feelings i hurt, as long as you’re only breathing and thinking for my existence, that’s okay..

i think my only limitation on acting on these thoughts is morality.. these things aren’t normal.. so i’ll keep quiet, but this is how i feel about those i truly care about.. i think something is wrong with me, but i don’t know what to call it..

i hope this doesn’t scare anyone away from me..

i have gotten five ask that have accused me of being a narcissist based on that post i made admitting my overly obsessive tendencies.. all of these asks are also calling me a monster whilst calling me a narcissist.. why are we associating narcissism with being monsters..? you all are ableist..

plus, i’m not a narcissist, i know that much.. so your research and leave narcissists alone.. their existence is not your insult..