working on it

In 2018 we’re getting over it

slap that pussy to pieces

this is my last resort

As an atheist, putting my hand on the Bible and saying an oath before testifying to a court is less likely to get me to tell the truth than a pinkey promise

When my parents were fighting for custody, I was old enough to have a say, so they put me under oath to assure I was being honest with my feelings. Using my best serious face, knowing what was coming, when offered the bible to swear on, I requested to swear on the secretary’s hole punch, “because it’s far more honest. It says it’s going to punch a hole, and it does, best God I’ve seen today.” My mom buried her face in her hands, my dad sighed and rubbed his forehead. The judge almost choked on his water before telling the bailiff “find this young lady a hole punch!”

whys everyone on this site a compulsive liar

and all the lawyers clapped

Do “flat earthers” think all the planets are flat or just the Earth?

Fuckin goofball thinks there’s other planets.

I have an idealized version of myself in my mind and she’s really pissed off at my life choices

you’re here, and so am i! it may be just a dream, but at least we’re together

I've never been to WalMart in my life. Sure my physical self has been on a handful of occasions, but spiritually or mentally, I've never been