Certified They Kisser

i remember july like it was yesterday

[Getting so angry it makes my brain disease worse] people sre supposed to be nice..

this girl was showing all the signs of being a secret mermaid so i pushed her into the pool and she turned into a forty foot long mosasaurus which is tbh way cooler

not really sure how to get her out though

for those of you asking why i pushed her into the pool in the first place: i work for a duplicitous small town aquarium and i'm trying to kidnap mermaids to jump through hoops and shit to entertain tourists and make money. fucking obviously. now that i know she's actually a mosasaurus though i Have fallen in pure-hearted love with her

A big part of being a quadruped is being able to just lie down anytime. Waiting? Loaf time. Talking to someone shorter than you? Loaf time. Falling asleep in the sun? Loaf time. Bored? Loaf it up till something interesting happens. Leg hurt? Loaf time.

Imagine the surreal insanity of being Irina Petrova and just hanging out having a hobby that you're very intense about and then you notice something weird and then all at once your name is one of the most uttered in history, by total accident. In the movie universe they describe her as a "radio telescope enthusiast" she does not even do this professionally. And suddenly everything is Petrova line, Petrova frequency, Petrova wavelength, Petrovascope, Petrova Task Force, Petrova problem. And you're like man. I have a day job.