rem

in which after being ghosted by roman, you threw a party to take your mind off of it, secretly hoping he would come. by the end of the night, you have a strong realization that none of what you and him shared was real.

warnings angst, cheating, smut 18+

not proofread .ᐟ

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you were never really the type to care for relationships. too busy with modeling gigs or work from online school. these things overwhelmed you, and to have a relationship would just be a distraction and make you fall behind.

you lived by yourself in beverly hills, a nice place overlooking the hills proudly paid off by your father - a congressman for the state of california. to say you had it easy was an understatement.

you took advantage of it sometimes. though you had modeling and school to worry about, your bestfriend that you modeled alongside with always found a way to convince you to throw a ‘tiny’ party because your house was the ‘perfect party house’, that always ended up with a three-way happening in your guest bedroom, or people that you didn’t even know passed out on your couch the next morning. beside from being la’s top model, you were now known as la’s best partythrower. you had to admit though, you loved it.

you loved it mostly because that’s how you met roman. one humid saturday night, you danced with your friends in the middle of your spacious living room. you were drunk and it felt like everything was blurred and moving in slow motion. at one point, you looked across the room and saw him.

roman was standing amongst his friends. you’d recognized him because of his friend, hollis, who had recently blown up because of his song ‘jeans.’ but what made it so special was the fact that out of everyone in the room who was obnoxiously loud and yelling in your ear, he was the only one who caught your attention. the only one who wasn’t blurred in a crowded room full of dancing drunk people. it was like it was only you and him in that moment.

that night, you confidently walked up to him. your eyes were low from all the liquor you consumed, and your hips had a certain sway to them that didn’t go unnoticed by all the other guys you passed.

roman saw you and dismissed him friends, who quickly and thankfully read the room when they saw your small figure standing behind them. as they walked away to occupy themselves elsewhere, roman stood up straight and walked closer to you, closing the distance between you two.

that night ended in a passionate kiss, a follow on instagram, and his phone number. and ever since then, you’d been attached.

you didn’t know what it was about him that made him so desirable. different from the rest of the guys who had been left on delivered in your dm’s waiting for a turn. whatever it was, you didn’t mind the distraction that you so long ago didn’t want at all.

in the beginning, you and him spent a lot of time together. he always invited you to hangouts with his friends, pop up shows in la, for a late night drive. but then, he started to change. you wanted to do everything with roman, but he was always ‘busy’. busy at the studio making beats, busy planning a tour, busy making lyrics. he was never too busy to fuck though, which you never took too much into consideration. what you wanted to do the most though, was make things between you two official.

it’d been months since you guys first met each other. six to be exact. and when you expressed your feelings to your bestfriend about it, she explained that 6 months is way too long for a ‘talking stage’. so that same night, you bought it up to roman.

he’d came over hoping to relieve ‘stress’ from all the stuff that had been consuming him. pulling him away from you. and that night, the sex felt different. not different in a good way, that felt way too good to not make you overthink. it was the type of sex that felt like the last time.

he whispered sweet nothings into your ear, ‘your so perfect baby’ ’the best i’ve ever had’, gripped you tight against his chest as you rode him.

‘fuck i love you y/n.’ he panted as you both pulled away from a breathless kiss. it’d honestly caught you off guard so much to the point where you stopped aggressively rolling your hips onto him, trying to chase your high. that was something he never said.

‘wha..’ you started to question quietly, but roman quickly flipped you over and thrusted into you hard and rough before you could even form a sentence. you moaned out loud and arched your back.

‘fuck roman i love you too.’ you said somewhere between a gasp and a moan. you’d been so caught up in the pleasure that you didn’t care what came out of your mouth at that point. he was fucking you way too good to even form a thought.

he leaned down to bury his face in between your neck and you moved your head more to the side to give him more room and leave sloppy, wet kisses. he bit onto your earlobe and panted, ‘you’ll never forget me baby. never forget the way i fucked you just like this, right?’ he said breathlessly.

you just nodded, not taking his words into thought and your mouth fell agape when you felt roman’s hand slide down to rub your clit.

‘fuck roman just like that’ you moaned out and gripped his long, black locks, making him let out a hiss and fuck you harder.

‘cum for me y/n’ he said it so possessively and it drove you over the edge. that night, he made you come harder than he ever did before.

he kissed you and moaned into your mouth as he came shortly after, then rolling over afterwards, reaching for your nightstand and grabbing the blunt he’d rolled before, lighting it. he took a long drag of it before inhaling and blowing the smoke out into the atmosphere of your room.

you guys had been tangled in your sheets for awhile, passing the blunt back and forth between you two before you finally gained the courage to bring up a ‘relationship’.

‘roman?’ you said his name with a sort of fear laced in your voice.

he hummed, meaning he was waiting for a response.

‘why haven’t you asked me to be your girlfriend?’ you looked at him dead in his face now and you swore you saw dread wash over his face. he just shrugged before leaning over to put out the blunt with your nightstand and sitting up.

‘i mean i thought what we had now was pretty solid. wouldn’t wanna ruin it..’ he started.

now you were fidgeting with your soft sheets, looking down and avoiding all types of eye contact with him. this is exactly what you didn’t wanna hear, and it was disappointing.

‘you know i’ve been busy y/n. i can’t sit here and commit to a relationship right now.’ you just nodded along with his words, and he looked at you waiting for a response.

he reached over to move a piece of your hair away from your face and grab you by your chin to make you look at him. ‘what’s wrong?’ he questioned. but you didn’t know what else to say at that point. you didn’t want to say anything else that’ll drive him away. little did you know.

so for now, you just gave a soft smile and shook your head. ‘nothing ro. forget i asked.’ and he smiled back at you, pulling you in for another kiss, and fucking you one last time until the night was over.

when you woke up the next morning, roman was gone. all of his stuff was gone, his phone, clothes. and he’d been gracious enough to clean the ash from his blunt last night off of your nightstand. it was weird though, because usually roman texted and said he’d left so you’d see it in the morning. but you woke up to nothing. you didn’t think much of it, until texts started piling on top of eachother.

it’d been a week. no access to roman, no one around you talked about him. it was killing you. you knew he saw your texts too, because despite blocking and unfollowing you on instagram, your messages were still being delivered.

so you had an idea. an idea to throw the biggest party yet. invite celebrities, top influencers, your modeling friends, anyone in the la area. you had your best friend make a flyer, and she was suspicious of your sudden moves to throw this party. it was always her idea to throw the parties. but she did it anyway, of course asking if everything was okay first.

roman was obviously gonna see this flyer. everyone was posting it, it had been printed and put all around the poles of hollywood blvd. it wasn’t easy to miss.

that night, everyone showed up and the crowd piled quickly. you knew you would get in trouble with your father, but in the moment all that mattered was him. roman. seeing him once again, at a party, not as big as this one, but just how you had met.

you wanted to catch his eyes on yours across the room again, feel the same feeling of confidence when you strolled over to him and started your story. you got super drunk that night, your bestfriend even told you to slow down.

but you ignored her pleas, tugging your arm away from hers when she tried to stop you from taking your almost hundredth shot of the night. ‘god leave me alone.’ you huffed and almost tripped over your heels when you walked away from her, and she did leave you alone, but for the rest of the night, she watched you unfold.

she watched as you’d been disappointed everytime someone walked through the door, she didn’t know who you were waiting for. she’d watch when you looked up at a guy snaking his arm around your waist, a sparkle of hope in your eye that quickly turned into disgust when you realized it wasn’t him. it was all because of him.

he didn’t come to your party. he always came to them after you guys met, and this one, your biggest one yet, he didn’t come through.

you opened your phone as you sat by the pool that night, wishing to escape from your thoughts, only to be met with something you wished you never came across.

liked by username, username1, and 2,352 others…

dailyboylifeupdates these photos were just posted by rommulas on his story 3 minutes ago. is this a girlfriend? thoughts?

view 347 comments …

your phone shook in your hands as you swiped back and forth between the two attached photos. you scrolled through the comments hoping to find the mystery woman, and when you found her, fuck was she beautiful.

so this is why he blocked you, this is why he didn’t come, you thought. tears began to fill your eyes and you felt your throat begin to tighten as you viewed her page. she had a few posts up of roman dating all the way back to 4 months ago. that was after you guys met. in the photos, roman had a bright smile on his face, or his hand around her waist.

just when you thought you’d saw enough, there was another post of them, but it dated back to a year ago. how could you have been so fucking stupid? how did you not see the signs? so this whole time they were together?

the thoughts filled your mind uncontrollably and your heart squeezed in your chest as you finally swiped out of instagram and closed your phone. you felt a tear finally slip out of your eye.

at this point, you weren’t even sad anymore. just angry. you got up quickly and stormed back inside, met with your best friend who was looking for you for the past ten minutes. you stormed past her and knocked her in her shoulders, making her look at you with a shocked expression before catching up to you.

you grabbed the nearest drink on your kitchen counter and downed it, almost choking. it was all too much. you needed to forget.

your friend grabbed your shoulder and turned you around, seeing your now smudged makeup from your tears, your mascara trailing down your cheeks. she decided then the party was over.

that night you cried uncontrollably to her. you sobbed into her shoulders as you whimpered out, ‘he said he loved me’ numerous times. all she could do was console you at this point.

she rubbed your back as you threw up in your toilet, whispering ‘it’ll be okay y/n’ and shushing you when you continued on your rant about roman.

when you woke up, you were obviously faced with the consequences. a throbbing headache and a painful hangover. numerous voicemails from your father about this ‘unacceptable party’ and how he was going to take the house away if you didn’t fix the damage now. about how he’d stop the cops from arriving at your house and shutting it down before it got out of hand. but then you remembered.

remembered why you did it all last night. you threw the party for him. for roman. he never showed up, instead he gave another girl everything you asked him for.

he kept you a secret from everybody, from her. surprisingly no one ever found out about you two. only roman’s friends knew, based on what happened at the party you guys met at for the first time, and your best friend, who you expressed your feelings to multiple times when you felt roman becoming distant. you could expose everything if you wanted to, but you couldn’t. it wasn’t in your power anymore. you felt weak.

he ruined you. you didn’t realize the damage he’d caused when you logged into your school account and realized all the work you’d missed from the past couple of months. your professor messaged you multiple times expressing that if you didn’t turn in your past assignments, you could fail his class. you slowly started to remember from before you came into the relationship with roman. how you were the one that didn’t want the relationship because it was a distraction and somehow roman had managed to flip it completely.

even modeling became messed up for you because of him. everything around you crumbled. from then on, you dreaded any type of parties, declining your best friends offers when she invited you out. you needed to become yourself again.

no more parties.

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