Rolex Bound

Those are the best dapples I’ve ever seen

Morocco Royal Tour CSI3*, El Jadida

Jumpers- gotta go so fast

Hunters- based on how much money you have

Equitation- whichever rider is the skinniest wins

Ponies- spoiled little girls with crazy midget horses

Dressage- where people fork out thousands for dancing horses

Eventing- a triathlon for the insane where equitation doesn’t matter

Barrel racing- a competition to see who can do the best splits midair

Reining- the art of spinning really fast

Trail riding- a test to see how bombproof a horse really is

Western pleasure- drugs and glitter

$300,000 Hampton Classic Grand Prix

Hampton Classic Horse Show in Bridgehampton, NY

Plot Blue

Pau 2016 | CCI 4* - cross country | © Libby Law

Pau 2016 | CCI 4* - cross country | © Libby Law

Historically, it was the practice of commanding officers in battle to always have a second horse ready and waiting should your first horse tire, and it seems Michael Jung has made a careful study of the art of war. While he and overnight leader fischerTakinou had a beautiful four-star debut for the gelding over the soft footing at Pau, it added 8.8 time faults to their score to drop them to fifth going into show jumping.

But no matter. He’d already put in a nearly flawless performance on the smart and elegant fischerRocana to maintain his lead in France’s four-star event. They added just .4 time faults in one of the fastest rounds of the day to lead the crowd on a score of 44.2.

I’m gonna let yall caption this