crashing out over hiroaki nakamigawa being genuinely the best bpd rep i have ever seen in media. iāve been in this fandom for barely 3 weeks now but heās already come to mean so much to me as a character and iām so so attached to him, like i will never stop being amazed by tetro danganronpa and how honest it is when it comes to underrepresented topics that are an uncomfortable reality for so many people that never really get to feel seen that way.
(impassioned analytical rambling & tons of spoilers ā¬ļø)
so many things that often get glossed over in fiction or get left implied are CONFRONTED in tetro, bluntly and unapologetically, while showing the consequences in a way thatās so raw but still so empathetic. especially things like the less āpalatableā aspects of disabilities, like how dissociation is fucking annoying and severely inhibits your life and makes people see you as helpless when you cant even do anything about it with ojima, and how humiliating it can be to ask for help even when you really REALLY need it with kamimura. especially gendered issues like misogyny in teen girlsā home lives and being forced to grow up too quick with watari, male relationship abuse, its normalization & dismissal, and its effects on self esteem (not to mention when combined with child abuse) with yanagi, and how strong women realistically often have to become strong out of necessity (rather than just being built different girlbosses by nature) with hayashi. tsuno was also an amazing portrayal of ongoing successful recovery while at the same time one of self-imposed pressure and burnout.
then thereās some that become more apparent with outside perception, like isono getting straight up mischaracterized for being A Woman and not having enough screentime to be really understood, and sasaki. oh my god sasaki. sasaki being a victim of SA in school, then vilified for taking on a MUCH needed leadership role in an otherwise unruly group of equally scared teenagers, and fuck, of course she did some awful shit, but she was scared. all of them were. and hiroaki, her most dedicated hater, was the only one to realize that wasnāt who she truly was afterwards and empathize with her.
hiroaki specifically is such painfully and uncomfortably realistic bpd rep, but honestly? itās a needed perspective. definitely for me, at least. a lot of the vile shit both other characters and fans say about him, real people in my life have said to me, and heās not exactly recovery goals by any means but god dammit he is TRYING when all odds are against him and holy shit is that difficult enough as it is. heās trying so fucking hard. i saw myself in him, a version of myself that struggled and felt how he felt, and i was rooting for him the whole time. i cried with him and i cheered when he made progress and i got emotional when someone empathized with him and was patient and forgiving like i wish someone had been with me.
what i love especially about hiroaki is how well-rounded he is in terms of bpd portrayal. he doesnāt just have splitting episodes or obsess over an fp or have super black and white views/opinions, but he also has horrible self-esteem issues that he hides behind an exaggerated ego and lashes out to hide how much he cares and feels crushing, overwhelming self-hatred because of things other people say or think. and even then, we see the less discussed aspects of more acknowledged symptoms with him too. when he splits, he feels immense remorse after. case in point, the sheer horror he felt at the end of [low talk]. he still sometimes tries to make things right where he can even though he canāt stop self-sabotaging. he has moments of kindness with multiple people to varying degrees of closeness.
and despite all this awful shit happening to and around him, he is making a valid fucking effort and god i will always defend him for that. heās emotionally self-aware and he has goals and values and he cares about people in his life even if heās bad at showing it. sure, heās trapped in bad habits and a bad lifestyle, but also⦠heās just a kid. heās 17 years old doing and believing and enduring things no one should have to at that age. heās been on his own since he was even younger too.
people fault him for backsliding in his attempts at Being Better but that is so fucking unfair, because it is never that goddamn simple. ever. you hear ārecovery isnāt linearā just about everywhere, but itās so rare to see that process explored so thoroughly in fiction and when itās just brushed under the rug to make him out to be an irredeemable villain because itās annoying or not entertaining enough, itās⦠so painfully real.
the [stairwell] episode in particular was fucking brutal for me. iāve been him in that situation, except instead of someone like tamba it was someone much closer to me than that. it was such a personal gut punch hearing her scream at him that he just canāt be a better person no matter how hard he tries because thatās just who he is. because he doesnāt want to change bad enough, because heās innately selfish and cruel and evil and doomed to die alone and unloved. and he stands there and takes it while she hits him everywhere it hurts most, and while i will acknowledge tamba is just as scared and flawed as the rest of them, she says some of the most deplorable shit to him a person can say to someone until he just canāt take it anymore and proves her right. and just like that, heās regressed back to square one again.
and tamba is never held accountable for how horribly she treated people, or even truly acknowledges how fucked up what she said to hiroaki was. itās not even clear if she realizes the depth of it. that part is uncomfortably real for me, too. tetro is such peak fiction dude because the only reason i canāt like her is personal beef with her actions related to me and not her.
anyway iām a shameless tetro glazer, hiroaki is my beautiful & beloved bpd princess, and everyone should be nicer to him and should also keep in mind that some of the shit you say about fictional characters you could inadvertently be saying about someone close to you as well. this fangan is doing something extremely rare and extremely valuable, and at the same time creating such a vulnerable space for people, so always be nice & be considerate <3













