ncfvriousâ:
âthis is your sweater.â
    âI wouldâve thought that suggests itâs intended to look good on me. Either way, if youâre going to be stealing my clothes, you better start paying my DRY CLEANING bills.âÂ

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@rodolphuslestrangesq
ncfvriousâ:
âthis is your sweater.â
    âI wouldâve thought that suggests itâs intended to look good on me. Either way, if youâre going to be stealing my clothes, you better start paying my DRY CLEANING bills.âÂ

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ncfvriousâ:
bellatrix let out a growl as the younger student ran away. âthat bellend spilled it which is why their bloody phone is in a thousand pieces,â she gestured to a phone lying in a pool of coffee a few staircases below them. âi was about to make them get me another one but then you had to show up and let them go,â she hit him in the chest to emphasize each of the last three words.
     âHow did you let them near it, anyway?â He asked mostly just to ask, scrolling through the feed on his screen. The hand that came dangerously close to wrinkling the front of his burgundy shirt was intercepted JUST in time, if only because anyone who met this girl more than once knew to expect such things. Fingers around her wrist, Rodolphus guided the hand away from himself, thank you very much. And if the angle was a tad unnatural, he did not mind.
   âSweetcheeks, did Druella NEVER TELL YOU one shouldnât touch what doesnât belong to them?â
rookwooodâ:
casting his eyes downward to inspect what heâd decided to throw on that morning, augustus pouted, then looked up at rodolphus with a wounded frown.Â
â ââ my nan knitted this. â
  "My point PRECISELY, although I suppose the good grandson act and the whole,â Rodolphus waved a vague hand, âpuppy dog eyes thing youâve got going on might just counteract it. Either way, youâre planning to stand there forever or will you sit down so I can get yesterdayâs DADA notes? Your fault for not waking me up in time, you know.â
pundorahâ:
âUgh,â Pandora took off her sweater immediately, giving Rodolphus a frown even though she knew he was right. âIâm THINKING this purple blazer might be nice for the next Hogsmeade trip,â she commented, grabbing it from the clothing rack in front of her. âIâll just keep that sweater for when we binge Westworld. Youâll just have to deal with it then.â
  âI still canât believe you bought a good purple blazer when it matches with none of my shit. When are you shopping for me? Youâre the only one I can trust with this, anyway.âÂ
  Emerging â EMERGING from the billows of smoke around the armchair he was sitting in ( not like it was set up this way and definitely not like heâs been suffocating for good two minutes just for the aesthetic ), Rodolphus reached over Pandora, chin lazily resting on her shoulder, and ruffled through an impressively wide array of clothing with a cigarette kept carefully at an armâs length from any and all fabric. âGreat, because forty minutes of envious longing after being an AI isnât enough of a torture,â he fished out what mustâve been the only other reprehensible piece of clothing in that wardrobe â courtesy of cousin Janet and the bi-annual gifting spree, no doubt â and mounted it atop Pandoraâs head with feigned festivity. âThis can be salvaged as halloween attire, by the way. Iâll go as Clementine if you go as Maeve.âÂ
YALL ik iâm really MIA & iâm really!! sorry!! i asked for a semi-hiatus for a week bc iâm like in between apartments for a hot sec and itâs generally WILD but!! iâm sorry for all the IMs & threads i havenât answered yet and i canât wait to get back to all of you beautiful people as soon as i get a sec <3

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edgarbbonesâ:
âthatâs a bold face lie, mate. what matters is whatâs underneath the sweater. my heart. but youâre probably right. my ex got me this sweater.â
   âThe SHEER AMOUNT OF PATIENCE one would need to rely on their heart for such matters, Edgar.â Rodolphus sighed, eyeing the sweater once more with new information in mind. âAh, well, I see now why you broke up with them. â
luciindcsâ:
        â YOUâRE TALKING OUT OF YOUR ARSE , LESTRANGE . i could be wearing a black bin bag and iâd STILL get laid . â
    âThat some new KINK?â
benjaminflintâ:
Benjamin clenched his jaw as Rodolphus adjusted his robe. People adjusting his clothes and hair were one of his pet peeves and heâd usually smack their hand away or utter a few well chosen (or more impulsively, to be honest) words to make them stop. Sometimes he allowed it, but rarely and by approximately a handful of people. Since he did consider Rodolphus a friend, he let it pass. Though he did readjust it afterwards again, to have a final say.Â
âDonât flatter yourself,â Ben scoffed. âWhat? I can be pleasant. But I donât owe it to them,â he said, nodding accusingly towards the Hufflepuffs. As if Rod had just offended his entire family in one sentence, Ben glared at him. âDeck them with my broom? Are you out of your mind? Itâs for flying, not to whip people with, especially not badgers. Give me a beater bat then we can talk. â Wha-?â Benjamin felt his ears turn bright red and he folded his arms across his chest, scowling at the older Slytherin. âIâm all good. Only in your dreams, Lestrange.â
    Chin tipping upwards just slightly in a mix of almost impressed confusion, Rodolphus half-heartedly rolled his eyes at the readjustment of robes. It would be no delight to annoy if Benjamin could not annoy back; and historically, not many other people managed. It was, if you must, a trait somewhat respectful.
   âMe? Flattering myself? Unheard of,â he drawled, starting to walk towards the nearest bench to study for the project while they were at it. âWell MY BAD for confusing two essentially interchangeable pieces of wood.â Averting his eyes to try and keep a straight face, Rodolphus â by way of familyâs occupation, plenty acquainted with all things wooden â still attempted to spew shit infuriatingly ignorant, if only to see what itâd do to Benjamin. He did love to torment him so, in whatever ways available. Noticing the shade of his friendâs face out of the corner of his eyes, he let his own face convey no more than shamelessly feigned concern. âYou feelinâ hot, buddy?â
(1/?) great screenplays: the social network (2010), aaron sorkin
hesjcnesâ:
              â aw, really ? i thought it was sexy. â
    âTHATâS IT, I give the fuck up on you all.â

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licnhcvrtâ:
turning around lily faces him with her brows knitted together in confusion, âwho says iâm trying to get laid? i would say my sweater is sending a perfect message then so, thank you for your unwanted input.â
  âSAD. But valid, I suppose.â Rodolphus added as an afterthought, looking up with a little more interest. âOne does need a reprieve from time to time. What is it that the lot of you does these days, then, other than thinking up ways to assault peopleâs senses?â
#drunk children
@rodolphuslestranges
rbstnlstrngâ:
 â â If thatâs your tactic into convincing me to give it up, you need a better one. I look great in anything, letâs not kid ourselves. â
  âOH, itâs cute of you to think I need to convince you instead of just taking it. We werenât born with the same size to just waste that. You get your impeccable fashion sense from me, anyway.â
dorcmeadowesâ:
Dorcas frowned whilst glancing down at her chunky knit sweater before turning her eyes back up at the boy before her, âI mean⌠Youâre not wrong however, itâs quite cold outside. I dunno if youâve considered that, but not everyoneâs trying to catch a lay between classes. Some of us are trying not to turn to ice.â
  âOne could argue getting laid is a WONDERFUL way of avoiding such a fate, if done right. But whatever floats your boat, of course.â Suddenly aware that it was quite chilly, he was already starting to regret leaving that jacket upstairs; perhaps even desperately enough to contemplate paying the elves a visit.Â
  âYouâre not on your way to the kitchens, are you? No one should be trusted to go down there alone, you know.â Rodolphus side-eyed Dorcas, spinning his chair to face her and moving away from a stack of papers he wanted to escape from for two solid hours now. âLimitless amounts of food tailored to your every request is too much power even for me. Merlin, FINE. Iâll keep you company.â

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mckiinnvnâ:
â Neither is your face, but itâs a good thing I would never even consider going near the likes of you. Thereâs not enough money in the world to even tempt me.â Marlene spat out as they lazily walked down the steps from their dorms, shooting a glare at him the second his mouth opened. There went their plans to sneak out of the common room for the evening, Marlene thought, desperately hoping to themselves that the male would retire to his room soon.Â
âI feel obliged to note,â Rodolphus dragged, amused by the vitriol, âthat your first associations with GETTING LAID were either money or me. Iâll leave the rest of the insults I could derive from this for you to go and speculate on in your own free time, unless you came down here to act on either one of those impulses. Take a seat, in that case, Iâll offer free therapy.âÂ
regiiserpensâ:
â While I agree, it may be best on us if he doesnât ever reproduce, sweater or not. It looks like some hideous homemade disaster.â Evan glanced over his shoulder to see what had caught Rodolphusâ attention, distaste lacing his features as he gave the student a one over. â Though I do think the sweater is the least of his worries, have a look at those torn up shoes.âÂ
    âItâs a good thing theyâre torn up, Ev. Wasnât there a Quidditch robe in his hand?â Rodolphus swirled the spoon in his cup, lazily eyeing every other passer-by at the lack of anything better to do. Dining in the Great Hall instead of the kitchen was a MISTAKE, and having Evan to keep him company was, really, the only solace. âI wouldâve had a breakdown if I had to watch someone drag proper oxfords through dirt, and then weâd have to embark on a quest for the best liquor this castle can offer to keep me from spiralling. I only allow myself such dramatics not more than once in a week.â