uh huh

I was jsut a fuckinf kid god fuckinf dammit fuck you and you were too so I don’t blame you. I am just a distant hazy memory to you.

I’ll always look for you in everything everyone I see everyone I meet everyone I’ll ever encounter a part of my heart and soul got stuck with you.

I don’t Care how young I was. I was in love. I loved with all my Heart I know maybe most people don’t know or realize how much someone can love with their all in 5th grade but I still dream about you even if you don’t dream about me. You had a Kid with someone else and it wasn’t me. I wonder how life would’ve been if I never lost you.

I’m so wrapped around their finger they literally don’t even know how much Influneve and control they have over me. This isn’t fair why am I here I should’ve killed myself in highschool and been one of those tragic stories. I HURT TOO IM HURTING TOO IM STRUGGLING TOO NOTBING THAYS HAPPENS TI YOU NEGATES ANY THING I FEEL I WANT TO DIE INWANT TO DIE I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT IT HERE I SHOUKDVE DIED IN MIDDLE SCHOOL I WANT TONDIE WHY AM I HERE WHY DIDNT I BLEED OUT THEN WHY DID I LIVE WHY CANT I HURT MYSELF LIKE I USE TO WHY CAN I BARELY HOLD A FLAME TO MY SKIN WHEN I USE TO CUT SO DEEP ID SEE THE FAT TISSUE I USE TO SEE THE WHITE WHY WHY WHY WHU WHY WHY AM I HERE I DONT HAVE A FUTURE. WHY AM I HERE WHY AM INSTILL HERE INWANT TK DIE PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME WHAT DONIDO PLEASE SAVE ME KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME PLEASE

Nothings new

Me who has a crush on someone at work but I’m trying to kill it because I’m still with that one person even though I always try breaking it off but they don’t let me and even thought we both know realistically we don’t have a future at all at least not a corresponding one

Like is is not so sad how you know how you’re gonna die one day ( sui*ide*)

Me who gets drunk and immediately unloads how much I actually want to kill my self and I have neve r been okay and honestly from the deepest bottom part of my heart never will be okay or normal :)

Me who thinks about overdosing every single fuckinf day 👁👄👁 like is that a normal person thing how normal is it to have thought abo it killing yourself everyday and fantasying about it and fantasying about how the w people around you would act after you’re dead :)

Me whose trying to be normal and plan my life like a normal person and mentally stable person would but still planning on killing my self somehow someway sometimes 👁👄👁 make it make sense