Rivenantiqnerd

Don’t ever hug a lobster when you see one on the street,

For decorum is essential when a lobster you must greet.

You may comment on the weather, compliment his choice of hat,

But crustaceans like their space if one should stop them for a chat.

Don’t ever hug a lobster when you’re strolling down the coast,

Simply nod and give a greeting, or a handshake at the most,

For a lobster’s first priority is formal social graces,

And one seemes over-familiar if a lobster one embraces.

Don’t ever hug a lobster when you meet one in the sea,

For a lobster’s spines and chitin make it difficult, you see,

And he might become self-conscious if you bring that fact to light,

Some horsecock motherfucker: 

For anyone seeing this post and wondering what kind of unholy heresy is currently having a blacksmithing orgy in front of their eyes, this is called a Lantern Shield.

This came from, YOU GUESSED IT, fucking Italy, home of lunatic steel-weaving mother fuckers who often simply looked at each other, and by each other, I mean their frenzied reflections in their shattered mirrors, and said “WHAT IF WE JUST DO THINGS”, which is, as we all know, Aunt Jemima’s recipe for success.

Lantern Shields were very indicative: They were meant to be bucklers that could carry a lantern, oftentimes for night time duels. Now, you’re wondering, why carry a lantern on a night duel when it could just prove detrimental to your overall movement? Why, to blind the mother fucker, of course! But, see, and this is the funny thing about Italy, when Italian blacksmiths realized that they could just add a hook to a buckler, they noticed they could also just add whatever the thrice condemned shit they wanted to them, so they started forging stakes, spikes, and blades that protruded out of the buckler and gauntlet as additional defense against anyone who, due to the poor visibility of mist shrouded, dark blanketed nights, would just walk right into your handheld barracks.

I mean, nothing better than a bloke closing the distance to you losing an eye or six because they didn’t consider you might just carry a porcupine on your arm, right?

COME ON BARBY LETS GO DUEL

drive-by thank you

Panel 1: The crow whistles to himself as he unlocks the front door of his house A trans flag hangs in the window.

Panel 2: “Excuse me!” calls a pink capybara from a nearby car. The crow jumps, startled.

Panel 3: “Hi!” waves the capybara, “I just wanted to say, I’m the mom of a trans kiddo...”

Panel 4: “And I know it makes them feel good when we drive past the flag in your window,” the capybara continues.

Panel 5: The crow looks at the flags as the capybara concludes, “It lets them know there’s other people like them out there.”

Panel 6: The crow pauses, eyes water and mouth open.

Panel 7: “You’re welcome!” says the crow

Didn't think that I'd have to post this exact comparison again, didn't even think I'd have to post it once, and yet I stand disappointed again.

On the left: a sign in German on a street in Bavaria, reading: "Jews are unwanted here." Photo taken by an American in 1937.

On the right: a message from a hotel in Bavaria, Zum Hirschen, sent to Israelis who tried to book a stay, reading: "Sorry, there are no Jews allowed in our hotel." June 2026.

Again, the incident has been "handled": Booking.com took the hotel off its platform and the hotel itself was contacted by the Israeli consulate in Munich. The hotel at first denied sending the message, but later stated that it was indeed one of its employees that sent it. It is yet unclear if the case will lead to formal proceedings.

Let me point out that one small detail. They didn't said Israelis weren't allowed, they didn't say Zionists weren't allowed. They said Jews. Now Bavarians aren't new at the scene of antisemitism, in fact they are very experienced, but nowadays, we don't say Jews when we're being discriminatory, no, we say something else. You're not supposed to say the quiet part out loud! (For those in my comments who don't understand sarcasm, that was it.)

This joins many concerning cases across Europe and the UK (not to mention the US!) that reenact the nostalgic scenes of the 1930s and 1940s. (Again, sarcasm). I haven't yet made a post about the spa in Spain that refused a Jewish woman on entry on account of her Magen David necklace. And here Europe strikes again, in the very place the Nazi party rose to power. All those woke westerners that are so proud to chant about punching Nazis, and where are you now? Aren't you ashamed? Wouldn't even recognize one if it was saluting in your face.

Im.. Soft 🥺🥺🥺