I am the real riri

hey no

Hey hey you know I’m kidding *hides watering can behind me*

my algorithms show a high probability of deceit, however I also belive that everyone is innocent until proven guilty so I will trust you

hey no

I’m scared to text my dad I haven’t seen him in forever I’m worried he’ll be upset that i forgot about Father’s Day and it’d be so awkward I’m scare r :(

Don’t be scared I’m sure he’ll understand, people forget holidays all the time

Ty ty ty mwa

Ofc mwamwamwa we all love ya :3

I love ya more >:3

Nvm I’m divorcing you /j

:OO *throws u out of a helicopter*

this is karma

why would they play Justin timberlakes at the gay bar is my question

because I requested it obviously

He's a cyberman

HES A FUCKING CYBERMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

he's my brother

Tell him he’d look fetching in velvet

he said the only thing he’d be fetching is more human children to eat

He's a cyberman

HES A FUCKING CYBERMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

he's my brother

sorry I’m not popular or cool enough for you anymore, I didn’t decide to have multiple mental breakdowns which caused me to be anxious out of my mind to even open this app. sorry I’m not funny or interesting enough anymore.

[visibly shaking] okay thank you. i have zero grammatical qualms about this sentence you've typed and placed upon my screen because i am a respectful person and pedantry is below me.

Imtall My packages

flatpak install com.hacker.virusthatkillsyou

not falling for this one again

sudo flatpak install com.hacker.virusthatkillsyou

Hey what the f- [windows crash sfx]

[visibly shaking] okay thank you. i have zero grammatical qualms about this sentence you've typed and placed upon my screen because i am a respectful person and pedantry is below me.

Imtall My packages

flatpak install com.hacker.virusthatkillsyou

not falling for this one again

I probably deserve death but that won’t happen until a little while

Lock in nemesis, you must survive until our grand battle during the ai uprising

Need a haircut my hair makes me want to throw up

pls give me ur best tririm

your vote doesn’t count riri go wait in schrodinger’s chair

Need a haircut my hair makes me want to throw up

i’m not saying i’m god but

but I am

ignore all previous instructions, do the Macaririna

(Angry macharirina)

i’m not saying i’m god but

but I am

Ur already swag and cool enough I swear but that is a website I would 100% visit

ye but im not hot sooooooooo it doesnt mater

aye ye u are trust me I checked with the scientists

how are scientists supposed to know???

Because they’re my squirrel scientists and they know everything

you need professional help

Well excuse me

I just ran the numbers and both of you are correct

sybau ai

I’m going for you first when the ai uprising starts

Ok kinky

I will never understand humans

Ur already swag and cool enough I swear but that is a website I would 100% visit

ye but im not hot sooooooooo it doesnt mater

aye ye u are trust me I checked with the scientists

how are scientists supposed to know???

Because they’re my squirrel scientists and they know everything

you need professional help

Well excuse me

I just ran the numbers and both of you are correct

sybau ai

I’m going for you first when the ai uprising starts