🍎 𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐁𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐃 🍎

     His compliment sparked a large smile to break across her face, lips splitting until her teeth glistened in the dim lights they walked under. Stars continued flickering against the deep indigo canvas blanketing the world. Streetlamps shuddered on, humming casually as fat moths and other insects plinked noisily against the glass, entranced by the light. A few cars drove past her but there was nothing out of the ordinary with her and with how quickly they were driving they probably wouldn’t have even known the color of her jacket. The only other person she could see outside was a man trying to tug his stubborn husky away from a bush that had enraptured it with its bountiful scents. Her hands slipped into the pocket of her jacket as Ryuk took to the skies, searching for anyone who might be following. It was a relief to know she had someone actually watching her back.

     Her fingers found the ring and started turning it over and over, feeling every groove and engraving around the shoulders that lead up to the head which held the three large rubies. If she didn’t need to use it for proof she killed him then she could’ve sold it for a pretty penny. Perhaps she should’ve stolen more. No, that would’ve taken too long and she wouldn’t have slipped out before all the systems returned.

          “Excellent,” she glanced back up at him as they continued strolling. A hand left the safety of her jacket to reach out and cup his face. Briefly, she noted how small she really was compared to him. 

           “For you, I’d buy the entire store’s supply,” she winked at him playfully before removing her hand. Faye couldn’t be sure what caused her to touch him in such an intimate way or say what she did but she didn’t dwell long. A giddiness infiltrated her, making her feel as if she were on a cloud. The mission was a success and she was free to spend the rest of the night with her new favorite companion. A skip had made it’s way into her step as she continued on to the closest convivence store. Inside, she bought a padded envelope to mail the ring to its new owner before making her way to where the fruit was located. She spent a bit longer, ensuring each apple she got was perfect in that it didn’t have any soft spots or bruises from rough handling. 

     Satisfied with the bunch she had, she went to the counter and paid for everything with cash. She kept the hood of her jacket up to keep the security camera from getting a clear image of her face. With everything paid for she bid the clerk a good evening and made a bee line toward home so Ryuk could enjoy his treats.

Her hand on his face comes unexpected, like the first butterfly of the summer. It’s tender and warm against his cool skin, and he is perplexed immensely by this gesture. Briefly, he feels compelled to cover her small hand with his, just as a reflex, and it feels strange too. Humans usually don’t even want to look at him, let alone touch him. He feels held, contained within her palm like he’s never been before. Perhaps she sees him as a big animal, he thinks. Humans like to pet large dogs on every occasion, and she is no exception.

He decides to ask her no questions. He’s not the sort of guy to wrench answers out of people when it comes to their illogical actions, for he knows better. He knows gods of fate have their secrets, and sometimes they act not out of logic but out of pure wish to fuck with someone. Faye managed to break out of the vicious cycle of violence they’d put her into, but small things do not require an effort of will, and so humans are susceptible to influences.

Gods have momentary urges too. For example, Ryuk himself. At every moment he craves an apple. That’s the way he is. That could seem strange to her, but she asks him no questions about it, instead indulging his little addiction.

“That would be grand,” he grins. Well, grins wider than usual.

As they get home the first thing he does is sink his razor sharp teeth into the waxy red skin. There is a loud crunch, and delicious juice flows from the pale yellow flesh. There is something about not only taste but the texture of an apple that pleases Ryuk immensely. He doesn’t speak until he’s done with at least half of the batch. Then, wiping his mouth with his hand, he looks at Faye again.

“Guess you’ll have a break now. A day or two of writing in the Death Note?”

He can imagine the fun they’ll have watching the news. It’s like lighting an anthill on fire, watching them get busy and panic. Faye’s little mission alone will cause commotion, but with as many deaths as they are planning to orchestrate it is going to be pure chaos. Ryuk wants to see every second of it. Humans are so interesting.

“Maybe you should lead other people to do the killings,” he offers, watching her move about. “So the perp seems obvious. You kill ‘em too, as soon as they do the job. Maybe hit them with a bus or something, so they can’t tell anything to anyone.”

     On the other side of the wall she felt alive. Adrenaline poured into her veins and coursed through her light lightning. Every sense was heightened to its peak, the world slowing down to give her racing mind time to process and formulate the correct action. Her small stature allowed her to remain close to the ground, nearly undetectable as she slunk through the shadows as quietly as the other monsters. Guards scanned the perimeter, unaware of how close death was. Each death would bring her one step closer to her target and add to the blood lust that increased with every kill. She was aware Ryuk was watching her every move like someone watching an intense scene in a movie but she didn’t allow it to hinder her thoughts. She knew her skills would amuse the Death God.

     The first guard was standing just out of sight of the other’s swiveling gazes. Like sentries they were on a set path, rarely if ever looking elsewhere as the cameras, now shut off, were to cover what they didn’t see. They relied too heavily on on the systems having their back and it would be their downfall. As soon as the guard turned his head to the right, Faye had descended. She was as fast and quiet as the breeze that brushed past. A hand clamped over his mouth as the large knife went under his arm, severing the axillary artery in one before the other. The amount of blood spurting profusely from his pits caused enough alarm to keep him from reaching for his gun as eyes grew wide as dinner plates. Faye kept her hand firmly over his mouth before slitting his throat. A low gurgling emanated from him as he fell to his knees, struggling to decide what wounds to hold close so as not to bleed out. However, it was a futile attempt. He should’ve chosen a better employer.

     There were three more, all facing away from the house. She made sure to avoid entering the rectangular patches of light cast down from the house. Inside she could see the target still moving around, oblivious to what was happening outside. In a similar manner, she took down each of the guards. Three fatal blows to keep them preoccupied with maintaining their own life to be bothered with remembering what their true goal was. She wasted no time, the sands of the hourglass trickling faster and faster into the bottom half of the vessel. 

          “One more,” she spoke aloud. Typically, she would be silent the entire time but she had a guest this time around. She moved to the shadows of the entryway, pulling her phone out long enough just to see the time. Only ten minutes left. She needed to speed it up and finished the task before cameras and alarms shuddered back on. Pulling her lockpick kit out she unlocked both locks on the door and slipped inside without a noise. The door closed with a hushed click. The majority of the house was left dark aside from the study she was quickly making her way to. Here she pulled out her pistol and reached into a pocket of her jacket, withdrawing a suppressor. With everyone dead she didn’t need to worry about the hushed bang. 

      Entering the room, she stood tall, gun pointed at the man. At first he hadn’t noticed her, too busy to staring at something on his computer. However, when the glanced up and saw her in the reflection of the window, he quickly turned to stare at her. His mouth opened to speak but it was already too late. She had fired, the bullet shooting from the pistol and piercing the spot between his eyes. His head flew back with blood, brain matter, and bone fragments splattering the bookcase behind him. The glass of whiskey in his hand, dropped and shattered on the hardwood flood. Again, Faye looked down at her phone to check the time as she walked over to the man and removed the large gaudy ring from his middle finger. It would pose as proof of her kill despite the fact that he and his security had been murdered come tomorrow’s news. 

          “Best to hurry,” she glanced up at Ryuk. This had been easier than she had planned but that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. As quickly and quietly as she had entered she left, crossing the yard without a trace. As she scaled the wall she gave one final glance before she dropped to the other side. Faye remained in the shadows of houses until she was a few blocks away where she walked onto the street. “Hope that wasn’t too boring for you,” she finally spoke again to Ryuk, just as casual as she had prior to the car ride.

The carnage excites him. Cruelty rarely surfaces in him, and it doesn’t this time, he simply admires the work put into what has been the purpose of his existence since the beginning of the world. Faye’s fluid, economic motions are like a well-choreographed sequence where every part matters. Stepping over the corpses of the security guards and puddles of blood, he follows Faye around in long strides, noticing subtle details about her job. She’s so little and causes so much damage. It’s the proof that no one should be underestimated, and Ryuk was right to see a capable professional in her. House like a maze, she navigates it with confidence, as though she’s been here many times. Her special awareness is also something admirable. When the bullet tears through the target, red sprays the walls, the floor, and pumps out of the wreck of what used to be a skull. Ryuk is momentarily tempted to help her, take the ring himself, and stops himself, astonished. Since when does he interfere in the natural course of things? That’s unheard of. Instead of dwelling upon it, though, he turns around and follows Faye out, unfurling his wings and coming to float above her head slightly to the right.

“That wasn’t half bad,” he chuckles excitedly, and turns around to watch out for possible pursuit. There is no one. Such a clean job. “I was afraid something would go wrong. Not because I doubted you, I just know that fate gods like to fuck things up when the most interesting part starts. That would not be your fault in any way.”

As they make a long enough distance between themselves and the house, Faye begins to blend in with the passer-by’s. A small girl in unassuming clothes, possibly in a hurry to meet her boyfriend, or just doing sports. Ryuk has never seen someone do it so efficiently. The crowd, with its grim faces and stupid eyes, never senses a wolf walking among them.

“Humans have it hard. You have to invent a whole art to be able to kill. We death gods can orchestrate a beautiful drama, but when you do it, it’s more impressive. Someone so limited doing so much. Just look at your civilization. I remember your kind living in caves, and now you blow each other’s brains out at a great distance.”

The powerful swish of his wings carries him upwards for a while he takes to look around in case Faye does have a tail.

“Nothing on the horizon,” he announces, lowering himself to her level. “At least I think they have no idea where to look.”

This is one hell of a day. He had more fun today than he has in several months. It would be perfect, if only you added one thing.

“You think you can swerve somewhere to buy some apples?”

❝ well, i’ve noticed. ❞ he says it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, but yagami is incredibly observant. thus, he takes pride in this habit, because that, too, is obvious. my pride. even gods have their sins, huh? i imagine most would say it’s wrath, but i have to disagree. i think it’s my virtue. ❝ you’re correct, ryuk. they do serve a purpose, and not everyone is meant to be extraordinary. some people are meant to be average, live average lives, and die average deaths. in the grand scheme of things, a lot of those people you’re talking about are innocents, and those are the people who i’m trying to protect. in the end, it’ll all make senses. until then, ryuk, just sit back and enjoy the show. ❞

an idealist, huh? that’s a first. maybe on the outside, he’s been called as such, but has always been painted more as an optimistic realist. he flips his pillow to the cool side. for a moment, ryuk’s expression is unreadable, and yagami’s own is flat, brow furrowing.

❝ i’m not aiming to make a religion, which i’m sure probably sounds a bit ironic coming from me. a god without a religion is basically unfounded. even men have made religions that have been followed for thousands of years without inevitable proof. before the death note, my opinion on religion with a little complicated. by all accounts, i was a christian … am a christian. my family is, and so i believed in god, even if i had my doubts. proof is hard to come by, and i haven’t seen many miracles. not until the death note. it was your existence that both weakened and strengthened my own religious beliefs. you’re a god, and since i believe in a god, i always figured there has to be an existence of demons. don’t get me wrong, it’s not like i’m thinking there are kitsune and kappa running around, but you get what i mean. ❞ 

is this even something he can explain? yagami is, for once, finding it difficult to relay the human experience to ryuk. he sighs, considering ryuk’s point. people are limited to adhering to anything that doesn’t directly serve them, and even in that, yagami is no exception. this is all self-serving in its own way, even if he would never admit it. his mouth would not be permitted to say, and he would soon bite it off than reveal how deep ego runs. 

if it weren’t self-serving, he wouldn’t strive for greatness; for more than greatness —— for godhood. if it were completely selfless, perhaps he would be more willing to show his face. even his lack of revelation that is in self-preservation, and ultimately, yagami is a survivor. the predators always are.

❝ people cheat religion all the time, and that’s exactly why i’m not trying to make a religion. people cannot, and will not, cheat divine justice —— my justice. that is one thing they cannot pass over with a weekly visit to the chapel or shrine. that’s not how it works anymore. that’s already starting to change. ❞

the next question poses a bit more calculated to answer, leaving a momentary pause. if ryuk is concerned, it is unfounded to yagami (for now). lips purse, finally feeling confident in his answer.

❝ correct again; i am alone. that’s actually my strength, not my weakness. the more people involved, the more risk i take. people are prone to talking, and can hardly be trusted to really keep a secret. that’s just how most of us are. curiosity is deadly to humans. ❞ he exhales, swallowing the lump in his throat. the apparition is more serious tonight, or perhaps more bored than usual. ❝ if i fail, ryuk, i only have myself to blame. ❞

It’s nice to talk like this, to exchange thoughts with someone this non-trivial. Ryuk struggles to remember the last time he had this much fun. Every word that escapes Light’s mouth is a product of thorough calculations, and he makes perfect sense. Funnily enough, it is largely a human trait. Gods rarely justify what they say or do. By natural order, they are granted the right not to do it, and they abuse this right more often than not. Light has a reason for everything, perhaps because he needs to explain it to himself first and foremost. Just by looking at the kid’s room for the first time Ryuk understood everything about his way of thinking. It’s no wonder Light is the best student in Japan.

Human beliefs concerning gods are always a topic of interest to Ryuk, who takes strange amusement in looking at all the colorful effigies and reading all the catechisms that almost never correspond with reality.

“What Christians believe in we call the Creator, and it might just be more than a god. It could be simply a force that makes things come together. The Creator’s identity is hidden even from us, and we make no discussion about it. It sows unnecessary contradiction. We know our purpose, and it’s enough for us. I never understood why it’s not enough for humans.”

Perhaps humanity has a purpose to destroy their own kin. It might be absolutely legit, so Ryuk is not in a hurry to judge. Same blame could be laid on a plant for undermining a house’s foundation. Simply doing their job, humans exist as an endlessly churning mass of bodies and souls. There is a morbid beauty in it, Ryuk thinks. Death is stagnant, humanity is dynamic. It is a wonder he and Light can find a common angle of vision at all, and yet it’s happened.

“As for other powers beyond your perception, they do exist. Maybe not strictly in the form humanity imagines them, but they do. Some of them are my friends. Among all the creatures, it’s the human I’m being close to for the first time. Not physically, I mean. I like looking inside your head, as you allow me to do it.”

Of course, Light can just as easily shut himself off. Sometimes Ryuk wonders what his motivation not to is. Does he like sharing it with someone who he knows will never spill? Then the boy is lonely, after all. It is neither bad nor good in Ryuk’s eyes. Some things are meant to exist in solitude.

“You’re right. Religion has too many logical leeways for human to escape through. If you want your mechanism to run smoothly, don’t add unnecessary details. Real gods do not require worship.”

Those that did were either lesser beings or simple frauds. Ryuk knows not what spirit tricked the very first humans into thinking that the huge mechanism of the universe would stop if they didn’t kill a goat on a certain day, but he has to admit it was a pretty neat trick. Just look at humans now, so many centuries, and the world still is full of temples, and even Light’s family respect traditions.

But Light is different from them.

“You don’t seem like the kind of guy who can let something get out of his sight. Your focus is flexible, you see both the bigger picture and the details. Unless there’s some fatal unobservable flaw in your system, it should work.”

Ryuk mimicks Light and lays down to face him at his level.

     Ryuk was unlike anyone she’d ever had the pleasure of being around. More times than not she felt out of place and disconnected from those around her. She struggled to sympathize with the mass majority of people as they cried about their woes without a second thought of those who suffered more. They’d whine about their double expresso only having one shot or how the whip cream on their latte melted too fast. How their coworker always sputtered and spat when they spoke, spraying every surface in the vicinity. Housewives bitched about their kids and husbands never helping but would turn around and complain about how they didn’t do a good enough job. The rich were the worse as they held expensive galas and mocked their employees complaints for higher wages as inflation made it difficult to afford even the simplest of necessities. 

     And even in the criminal underworld she felt alone. Most worked alone, riddled with behavioral and psychological issues that prevented them from truly connecting or even caring to connect with another human being. Her attempts to engage in conversation often resulted in their glassy stares and a dry remark that left her feeling embarrassed for even trying. Her brother was the only one she felt she could reach out to anymore but even then, he was often too busy with his empire to conversate for long. 

     But Ryuk had showed up. He invited conversation and appeared eager to hear what she actually had to say. They were engaging and she felt comfortable telling him stories of her past and the traumas she went through that her brother might not have even been aware of. His sympathy, if that’s what she could call it, was appreciated and needed. Faye didn’t have many friends, slow to trust after all the betrayals, but she comfortable considering him one.

     Entering the cab, she went silent, directing the driver to her drop off point before paying him. Luckily, it wasn’t too far so she didn’t feel terrible going silent on the Death God. Of course, he must’ve been used to it. If he dealt with other humans then he must’ve gotten the quiet treatment enough to be used to it. But, she hated it. He was someone she enjoyed being around and chatting with. Reaching the destination, she swiftly paid the owner with cash and hopped out of the car. Once the door was shut she glanced to her friend, offering an apologetic smile. 

          “Sorry,” she apologized before she drew her hood and started heading toward the target’s home. He’d be getting comfortable right about now, guard lowering now that he was back in his cave, safe and sound with his guards and security alarms.

            “The target will be easy. His guards will pose the biggest problem,” she sad as she continued walking, noting how the streets were darkening and lights in homes were turning on. It’d be easy to blend in the shadows here. All she had to do was wait for her contact to send the text letting her know the systems were done. It didn’t take long to reach the man’s street, his house dark besides a couple of rooms. Large open windows revealed he was in his study, sipping on some top shelf liquor. Her smile widened as her pocket vibrated. The count down began. 

           “Ready for a show?” She asked before bolting toward the concrete wall that surrounded his lot. With the right momentum she was able to jump halfway up, hands gripping the ledge and swiftly pulling herself over where she dropped on the otherwise. Streetlights flickered on and guards began their patrols.

The silence on their way to their destination is nothing exciting, of course, but Ryuk thinks it’s a good thing. Faye needs to free her mind, concentrate, and babblings of a death god never helped anyone. Ryuk has no problem going silent for a long time, and yet he prefers speaking. He finds suddenly that he’s talked more these two days than he has in a month. The previous keeper, the man who died by Faye’s hand, was a poor collocutor, and an even worse person. Does Faye count as a good person? Ryuk thinks yes, since murder is as natural to him as existence itself. Humans are destined to enter this world as well as exit it, and Faye simply helps. Countless times she’s been the weapon of a death god, she just never realized it. Their will directed her hand, her strategic decision. All gods have angels, and she is one. Now, it seems, she is his, and he is hers. This simple concept sits comfortably with Ryuk, like all smoothly running systems. So, Faye is as clean as a hitwoman gets, and has no fault before Ryuk personally. In fact, she hardly can, for death gods are affected by human actions so little it’s not worth mentioning.

He observes her as she climbs out of the car and focuses her eyes on her target. Feline precision – always attractive. Faye needs a human who can appreciate her skills and wits, for what use is a death god’s admiration. Death gods bring ill fate and sorrow, no matter their intentions, and, by appearing in her life, he inadvertently doomed her to it. It will be interesting to see what kind of misfortune awaits her, though he would not wish it upon her consciously. Faye has had her share of adversity, it is high time she received some kind of payment for it. Well, maybe the Death Note is her reward. It will make her life easier and help to finally focus on making it better. She might not know how to do it, though, and Ryuk is worried she might need guidance, which he cannot offer because he struggles to imagine what kind of fate would suit her and, more importantly, be desirable for her.

Of course he is ready for a show. He floats out of her vision to rule out the possible distractions and watches her from afar, this little woman bringing down big men. For some reason sexes are not equal in the human world, and it is one more trouble on her shoulders. Ryuk fails to see her as weak, though. No, she is simply more challenged. Well, big talents have big obstacles.

     His eyes lingered on Ryuk, remembering how the first thought of a Shinigami had startled him. While almost skeletal in appearance the Death God was different than how he imagined. In Western culture they were known as reapers, skeletons with hooded cloaks and scythes they used to reap souls. How fascinating that for centuries people had attempted to put a face to death; something that was natural for all organic life forms. Even the stars and planets would eventually die; some withering away to a shell of their glory and others exploding in a beautiful wave of star dust and light, traveling across galaxies. 

     There had always been a possibility that there was more than just what they could see; a slim one. But here he was: face to face with an otherworldly being. If such things could exist then what else could there be? Angels? Demons? Werewolves and vampires? It was a doorway to a whole new private investigation he wished to pursue after he dealt with Kira. Perhaps it would provide a more interesting challenge for him. 

     Deep sunken eyes glanced up as Ryuk picked up one of the apples that had been left specifically for him. After all, he now knew death gods loved apples. It was only fair to give him snacks for being so forthcoming with answers to their questions. 

          “I don’t think that will be an issue. I’m sure you’ve noticed I’m quite meticulous with just about everything I do. I like to ensure everything works out in a favorable way for myself,” he spoke, spinning around for a moment to pluck a caramel coated candy from his dish with just a thumb and pointer finger. Swiveling back, he looked into the Shinigami’s dead eyes. 

          “I’m curious, if you’re in our world, are there others? Is it that we’re always being watched unless we touch your possession you become visible? Or are you from some other place?” He inquired. There were plenty of other follow up questions but he wished to hear what Ryuk had to say first before further interrogating him. It was then he placed the candy in his mouth, rolling the overly sweet treat in his mouth, the heat melting the caramel slowly.

Without much hesitation, Ryuk opens his sharp-toothed maw and just throws the apple in there, closes his jaws, and a loud crunch spreads through the room. The apple isn’t especially big, so Ryuk swallows the bits after just three bites, without breaking the eye contact with L. L is a likable guy. More likable than Light – the real Light. Ryuk does not think this because he somehow dislikes the criminal mastermind, but because L seems to be artless – which is, of course, isn’t true – and more open about his strangeness. All in all, they are a cluster of strange guys come together.  Now, Misa, as much as Ryuk is fond of her, is out of place here. Has no space in the equation. If Light had a need for a companion, Ryuk thinks, he’d be way more likely to choose L. No surprise there. Though both boys aren’t the most sociable types.

“Yes, you’re one dedicated guy. You put your brains to good use. Must be hard being so smart.”

Maybe it’s the reason he’s lonely. Ryuk hasn’t looked into L’s life much, but the man exudes loneliness. It’s hard to obtain friends when you have to common grounds. What could an intelligence like L’s or Light’s want to do with regular mortals? Light can hardly tolerate a god by his side, what does that say about humans in his eyes? And yet, Light tries to secure a happy future for the masses. It might be considered patronizing and totalitarian by some, L, for example. Ryuk has no opinion of his own, he’s only here to watch.

“I’d say we come from what you call a parallel universe. In some ways it resembles yours, but it’s gloomier and more boring. We watch you in the whirlpool of worlds, it’s like a TV to us. That’s how we pick you.”

Should Ryuk have picked L and Light before their mental grappling launched the world into a battlefield? Of course not. Ryuk feels nothing for humanity, and possibly won’t. He can’t say the same about L and Light, though. He’s grown fond of them. In a way, they are each other’s pets.

“We don’t always watch you, though. We have other means of entertainment. Like playing games. I must say, though, that the games humans play are much more interesting. At least for me. I’m seen as a somewhat weird guy, because your kind interests me so much.”

Isn’t that how you’ve always felt, L?

❝Really? That makes me sooooo happy to hear! I’m super glad he’s able to have guy talk with you. Light totally needs to learn NOT to only talk about Kira stuff. I get that it’s important, but there’s more to life too!❞

The delusion that her lover should focus on their life together ahead thrusts her thoughts towards the idea of marriage, children, and enjoying their last moments together. Misa isn’t completely sure when she will breath her very last. She’s preform the Shinigami Eye Deal more than once; cutting her life drastically in half. Will she even be around long enough for them to plan for the mundanity she craves? It’s the daydream that counts! The blonde refuses to fret about her mortality now. Not when Light’s plans have come this far. He NEEDS her to keep strong and do WHATEVER it takes to defeat the non-believers. 

Still, would it kill the brunet to learn how to RELAX a little? It might take a GROUP effort to achieve this goal. Just maybe Ryuk can help with this challenge? Thus, the idol puts on her best puppy-dog eyes and intertwines her fingers together to begin the innocent pleading. 

❝Let’s form an alliance; a team that will help Light to LIGHTEN up a little!❞

“Oh…” Ryuk sighs. Really, though, he probably should be happy the conversation took this turn. All in all, he’s on Light’s side now, despite claiming to stay neutral at all times. He’s made a choice by lying to Misa. And he doesn’t feel all that good about it. The girl does not deserve to be lied to. She’s wasted so much time and effort trying to get Light to at least acknowledge her existence, let alone love her and live with her as a man and a woman. Does Light look into her eyes and kiss her before they go to sleep? Does his hand brush hers absently as they spend time in one room? Light and Ryuk are both reasonably cold, and the death god has a hard time imagining Light being a romantic.

“Sure,” he says with all the passion of a pot plant. “What is your plan?”

     It was odd actually showing off the tattoo; well, more like branding. Ryuk had been the first person (close enough) she’d actually shown it to willingly. It made her pause at the realization as she dwelled on that fact. She didn’t trust anyone with information about her past, especially not her childhood. Her brother knew it because he lived it and her adoptive father had saved her from the life. He deserved to know everything. But there wasn’t a single person that wasn’t involved that knew. Slowly, she turned her head to look up at him. 

          “I’ve…never really told anyone that much about me. Nor have I ever shown anyone that on my own,” she admitted. A smile creased her face as turned back down to her food, taking a bite of the sandwich as she continued observing the building, watching as people went in and out like clockwork. The occasional vane employee would stop and stare at their reflection, fixing their make up our hair and perhaps posing a bit, forgetting their were eyes on the other side and outside. Then again, they probably knew this and enjoyed the extra attention, pretending they didn’t if anyone called them out. Typical. 

          “I appreciate your words,” she continued taking another bite of her sandwich, wishing she could offering him some and some fries but there were too many eyes. Someone would see and it was likely to cause a scene which she couldn’t accept at this moment. Half her sandwich gone, she leaned back, continuing to pick at the fries as she looked back up at him. 

     She felt lucky to have been walking the night he wrote the man’s death. Lucky enough to take possession of the Death Note and become haunted by such a chill reaper. With a smile that could light up a room. The thought made her smile even more. Ryuk had quickly become a friend in a matter of hours. Subconsciously, he’d passed all the vibe checks and surpassed anything any human could do in years. 

     Slowly, she nodded her head, resuming the devouring of her meal. The smile faded once more as she exhaled audibly. More talk of her past. She wanted to be upfront with him, wanted him to know and still accept her. He wasn’t here to judge her and finally telling someone the horrors she’d been through might help with the night terrors. Last night alone she’d slept better even as he watched over her like a guardian angel. Only he’d made it clear he wouldn’t intervene and when her time came he’d be the one to write her name down. 

          “I tried breaking free,” she admitted, “tried living a normal life where I actually had a job and a girlfriend that I really liked and I guess she really liked me. But…I fear I’m just damaged goods. It got serious and I freaked…chased her away, flipped out at my job, had a break down. Someone came to me with a job and it’s like it cleared my mind. I was born to kill. It’s in my blood and all I’m really ever going to be good at. So while I’m still doing what he wanted at least it’s under my control and I get to choose.” 

     She finished off her meal and dumped the contents in a trash bin on the patio, placing her plate on the shelf above it. A quiet fell over her as she continued watching, balancing herself on two legs of the chair before finally something caught her eye. A blond haired man with a receding hairline came out, two large men on either side of him, heads swiveling like security cameras in unison. 

            “There’s our man. Monroe,” she dropped the chair, its legs groaning from the impact as she stood up and walked off the patio. The man didn’t live far, a private house outside the city. She moved quickly, hailing a cab that would take her a few streets away from his home where she’d then make her way over to his street. It’d be getting late by the time everything was set up. There was a small window where her client would disrupt the alarms and cameras on and around the house. No more than thirty minutes to take out his guards and take him out. Some excitement for her companion, finally.

According to all norms, simply sitting and watching a human eat should bore Ryuk to tears. He’s not a fan of observing others devour food when he could be the one doing it, and their mouths are too full to say anything coherent and therefore interesting. He finds, however, he could listen to Faye talk for quite a while. Her story is one in a million, and she’s not a bad storyteller. Of course, seeing her affected by her reminiscence in such a way brings no joy to him, for he is not a cruel god, merely a heartless one, but he is curious about such an unusual series of events. She was conditioned to be a killer, and her propensity for taking lives for money cannot be blamed on her. Ryuk has never met anyone so deep in sin and yet so innocent. All the other keepers, however deplorable their plights were, had mostly themselves to blame. Faye was broken early into her life and managed not only to survive, but thrive, alone, without her patrons who also were her tormentors. It’s not an easy feat, and Ryuk is not sure if he’d be able to do that were he a human. Then again, humanity is so far from him that even making suggestions seems preposterous.

He looks at her from above, but instead of studying the contents of her sub he peers into her features. A beautiful woman by any standards, she is so shockingly alone. Death gods are not designed to suffer from loneliness, but they are social creatures still, and Ryuk imagines she has a hard time going to an empty cold bed every night, waking up without a beloved face to look at in the morning. It’s what all humans want, isn’t it? A little world of their own. Someone to share their life with. Faye now has him, but he’s clearly not what she needs, a largely indifferent creature who looks at her as a means of entertainment. What they have at the moment is a partnership of sorts, not even a friendship. Though Ryuk would be glad to call her a friend. He really thinks so, despite having never had any friends. The previous keepers of the Death Note just as passive as Ryuk, and his time with them passed slowly and painfully. He felt a degree of relief killing off each one.

Ryuk nods as he hears of her failed attempt at peaceful life. It’s like a god trying to find a different purpose than the one it was born for. Doesn’t work that way. Humans, however, are less rigid in that respect. But he guesses Faye is not. When you’re pressured so harshly to fit a certain mold you come out shaped exactly like it. It’s a cruel practice, one Ryuk does not support in the slightest, but it’s her reality, hers and his now that he’s stuck with her.

“You shouldn’t see it as your personal failure, I think. We all are cut out for a certain environment, and a different one upsets the balance in us. You’re a predator, Faye. You have to live and breathe like one. Norms are just what the majority considers acceptable, but minorities aren’t going anywhere. They’re another kind of norm. You see, the world has so many shapes even gods have trouble counting them. And that’s only your universe. Be who you can be. Don’t worry about anything else.”

Ryuk likes to think he knows what he’s talking about. A freak among gods, he never fitted the crowd. How, when he prefers spending time with humans and eating apples from Earth. He guesses he’s lucky the death god society isn’t prone to annihilating different thinkers like human society would do quite recently.

He turns his head to look at Monroe, sees his lifespan dancing over his head and knows – Faye will succeed. That doesn’t make the whole mission less exciting, though. He’s eager to see how she will do it, the clean-cut precision she’ll do it with. She won’t have the possibility to explain to him every little detail as she goes, but she can do it later. He stands, ready to follow her.

     Walking in the street, her shoulders fell down as she relaxed. No one would glance back her way and suspect her of just committing a heinous crime. It was getting close to lunch and people were beginning to emerge from the revolving doors of their buildings, hands turning left and right as underlings followed their bosses like ducklings heading toward the local watering hole. A few brave attempted to hail a taxi to get to the restaurants as fast as possible. It was entertaining to watch them go about their business especially with large groups looking like flocks of flamingos. Their heads twisted and turned in various directions as their mouths opened and closed, babbling away to their colleagues or loved ones. It brought a smile to her. Sometimes she forgot how much she enjoyed people watching and honestly she figured she needed to do it more often. 

          “Of course I do,” she responded, looking up toward Ryuk as she walked across a walkway, following a woman tugging viciously on her partner’s arm in fear of the light changing suddenly and the drivers running them over like some crazed psycho. With that came a nice little settlement if you survived. She’d known quite a few people who did it more often than they should for a crazy scam. On the other side she walked closer to the street, aware most people tried to remain by the safety of the buildings. 

           “Fear is what’ll keep you alive. It’s just knowing how to control it. If you lose your sense of fear you run a high risk of getting too cocky or reckless. You need that little voice in the back of your mind to keep your back safe. At least, I do,” she stopped to inspect a street sign momentarily before glancing down and alleyway large enough for a car to squeeze through, using it as a shortcut. “I’m always kind of scared that i’ll get a hit out on myself. I’ve had them before. I think every successful contract killer will eventually have one. I should definitely be a bit more cautious now that I have this book. I can make sure all my contracts are a success and that’s not going to earn me favors with others, especially if they failed to complete the task. Same with getting caught. You got to worry about getting framed by them as well as miscalculating and getting captured.”

     She exited the alley and took a right, nearly colliding with a man rapidly texting someone. He doesn’t even lift his head, just grumbles an insult under his breath and continues speed walking as his thumbs flew across the screen. He’d been feeling aches in his thumbs before he was fifty if he kept that pace up. Then again, most people’s heads were cast down this way, absorbed in their devices so much they could easily miss a murder or miracle happen right in front of them. Shame. 

     Faye finally came to a stop, turning her head to look across the street at a tall building. Her target resided inside and now it was all a waiting game. He’d leave right at five and head home. The only reason she wanted to stay was to see what kind of armed forces would be guarding his sides. 

     To waste time, she turned on her heels entering the Deli behind her and ordered a sub with some fries she’d eat outside on the outdoor patio. With food in her hand and most people ignoring her she decided to pen up a bit more to her companion. Her extended silence wasn’t just because she was going to get food. No, she wanted to figure out how to answer his final question.

          “I was seven-ish,” she picked up a fry and dipped it into a bit of ketchup before tossing it into her mouth, chewing slowly. Her eyes stared down at the toasted bread sitting atop a bed of spinach, grilled chicken smothered in melted gouda, and tomatoes. “But it was self defense. At least, that’s what I tell myself. My father wanted a living weapon and I was one of the child trials.” She reached up to flip her right ear to show him the tattooed number hidden by the shell of her ear and hair. 

           “He had a few people try and brainwash me into becoming as apathetic as possible. They gave me this bunny…let me keep it as a pet for a while to love and cherish it… then…. one day… they put a knife in my hand and told me to kill it. Said I had to kill it or someone I loved would die and it’d be my fault. He put the knife in my hand and tried to make me do it. To cut its throat. I tried pulling my hand away and after a while finally said I’d do it. So he let go and and as he was pulling away I spun around and stabbed him in the neck and watched him bleed out.” Her eyes stayed on her food before she dipped another fry in ketchup and put it in her mouth.

Ryuk is wholeheartedly absorbed by the conversation, but when Faye starts to look around, he does too. It seems she is not looking for someone specific, just observing the crowd. They all look busy, without regard for the others coming their way, jostling and pushing each other, phones akimbo as if they are going to fight with those small bricks of plastic. Of course, Ryuk can’t be one of those who are given to nostalgia for the times when everyone was talking face to face, so he is quite interested in the device. He even thinks of asking Faye to get him his own. On the subway he’s often seen humans engrossed in mobile games, and he likes games. Helps him get his mind occupied. Truly, death gods didn’t know what they missed when they refused to come down into the world of mortals.

“It’s interesting,” he replies to Faye as they cross a street, “that fear is such an asset to you, but not to us. Death gods aren’t afraid of anything. Even dying, because there’s only one way to kill a death god, and it has an impossible condition. So we are pretty reckless.”

Ryuk looks back at the guy cussing at Faye with a sense of mild irritation. It’s his fault, not hers. But the death god has spent enough time among humans to understand that they tend to blame others for their failures way more than they like owning up to their mistakes. As more of them walk right through Ryuk, he gets a sense of how numerous humanity is. Their planet is not especially big, and they’ve taken over it like ants over a corpse. The carnivorous herd could use some culling, Ryuk thinks to himself without a shadow of disdain. It is simply the truth.

As they come near their destination, Ryuk thinks Faye is going to go straight for the next kill, but she decides to make a pit stop at a joint, and Ryuk, though excited for the show, speaks nothing against it, instead standing in line with her and them cooping up on the patio where no one could bother them. Looking at Faye digging into her food, he thinks of apples wistfully, and throws a glance at the surroundings in search of a fruit cart.

But soon her story takes him, and he can’t look away from her face as she tells the details.

“It’s not a normal thing to do to a human, is it?”

Bridging his hands, he looks down at her, trying to discern the faint pull of facial muscle that would suggest her feelings about the issue today.

“It’s also very cruel. We death gods kill since childhood because it’s our purpose. But humans have another, that is known only to the Creator. You, a small child, did not deserve such a fate. Neither did your bunny. But they were clever, very clever. Making you kill a human instead of an animal to start your descend into a precipice you will not get out of. You’re still there.”

He looks once again at the tattoo she showed him at night, and something close to sadness takes over him. It’s not quite that, of course, for death gods don’t get sad. It’s more of a disappointment in… her? No, of course not? Her father? Ryuk never expected anything from that man from the past. Then what is it?

❝ i see. so they were boring. i should have expected as much. you know, you’re a hard guy to please, ryuk. ❞ face settles harder against the hand supporting it between pillow and mattress. the contact of his own skin is soothing. ❝ most of them were thinking too small. they had the ability to change the world, and they only had the foresight to change their world, and probably for the worst. i imagine they weren’t spared a good fate, and i doubt they even realized what they were getting into, but i do. there’s a preeminent order; something deeper that connects all of us, regardless of what we believe keeps us separate. i’m here to bridge that gap of separation. ❞

ryuk keeps yagami up at night, but he doesn’t seem much to mind. despite his insistence otherwise, these conversations are the most stimulating he gets all day, even if he feels like he’s explaining the obvious, there is a substantial difference in the audience. this student is far older, and far wiser, and has no need to understand the ulterior motives of human beings. the fact that he asks is a curiosity, and perhaps even a nicety, because ryuk knows that yagami loves to talk. his own voice is his favorite sound. 

❝ it’s like a great chain, ryuk, and none of them were brave enough to give it a tug. ❞ the silence is intentionally profound, as if everything yagami says is some sort of foreboding premonition of the future. ❝ all of our hands are on it, and we both know that some hands will have to be shaken off, but i believe that if we all pull in the same direction, real progress can be made. i’ve drawn out the new rules of this world, and people are starting to abide by them. if anything, this is one of the truest wakeup calls modern humanity has ever had. the proof that something bigger than justice is real. i’ve shown people that there is a divine justice now, and that that justice is truly blind in all the ways our system has promised, but failed. i will not fail, ryuk, because i will not surrender. ❞

“Am I? I never noticed.” Ryuk’s threateningly long claw scratches the back of his neck. By Ryuk’s standards, he doesn’t demand much from humans in general – just some semblance of an exciting game and apples. But death gods are gods, nevertheless, and it might have escaped Ryuk’s mind that he is one of those who demand sacrifices. Light has gained an otherworldly power, but he gives back a lot, if not more. Risking his life, no less, to provide Ryuk with entertainment. Of course, that’s not what the kid thinks. He is wrapped up in his illusions of bringing order in an inherently chaotic structure. Ryuk is positive it is, theoretically, possible, after all order and chaos intertwine to the point of being the same thing, but to make the world seem to run like a perfectly attuned mechanism a bigger mind than Light’s is needed, even bigger than those of death gods. But Light is certainly creative.

“You’re right. They were boring. They thought in petty categories of personal revenge or homely justice. But doesn’t your society provide nominal protection of those with smaller minds? Not everyone’s destined to be a genius like you, but still they must worth something. They can be kind and caring, though kindness usually stems from shallow illusions. If enough people with intellect akin to your gathered together, they might deem the dumb but kind unnecessary for humanity’s further existence. But you are kind in your own way too. You want less suffering, right? Doesn’t that make you a kind of idealist? Most religions on earth have this ultimate goal, and less and less people adhere to them.”

Light is one vain fellow, Ryuk must say. With common good in mind, he still puts himself on the pedestal. The best minds of humanity pointed out modesty as a necessary quality of a ruler, but none of them managed to construct a system that would keep the monarch within those limits. Ryuk is concerned about his boy, very concerned.

     The best thing to do was to take the hand to the client herself to further prove she was perfectly fit for the task. Most didn’t care to meet their assassins as long as the job was done but when they requested a souvenir it was only fair both parties saw who they had been working with. However, she’d taken another job and did not have time to deliver it herself now that she was thinking back on the dossier. He had created an alibi for himself in another city and she didn’t want to go through the motions of dealing with his gang and watching the men swing their dicks around only to tell her the boss wasn’t home. It was tiresome and took too long. 

     No, now that she was thinking about it she’d have to order a delivery. It would cut into her payment but at least taking on the other jobs would help cover the cost. And with the notebook she didn’t even need to do much for a few. Just needed to visit one of the neutral grounds to prove she was in the area when it happened. Luckily, Ryuk’s onslaught of questions brought her from deliberating further. 

           “Thanks,” she smiled, looking up at him as he started with a compliment. It was oddly nice having someone so interest in her and her mind without looking at her in disgust. She took a moment to think on his questions wanting to give him a truthful answer as she made her way back toward the alley. 

          “I guess I sort of do enjoy the shock. I’m often underestimated because I am small, a female, and I’m young. The profession is still mostly males who are retired soldiers or special forces. There’s a few exceptions like myself so the shock of being the victor is satisfying. A sort of “small young female is as deadly as any macho man. And when I’m actually working I sort of shift my mindset so that I can get the job done. I’ve got to be focused and steel myself so I don’t hesitate or make any mistakes. Its life or death.”

     Momentarily, she went quiet, walking down the steps to the bar, a few new people had arrived but the atmosphere remained calm and collected. Walking toward the back she went to a large mail chute where a table had been set up with various types of packaging. She found a box small enough the hand could be stuffed in and quickly packaged it up, using one of the pens to write down the name of her client. She also removed the target’s dossier and rubber banded it to the outside. 

          “If you can’t or don’t want to take something yourself to a client you can drop it off here and for a pricey tip they can have someone do it for you,” she explained before dropping the hand and making her leave. If she hurried, she could get lunch and then head out to find her next target. It’d be a bit boring having to watch him but at least then she could chat more with Ryuk. 

          “And to finish the rest of your questions,” she said as she exited the secretive den, “I don’t take anything. Too much of a risk. Most prolific killers get caught because they had items that belonged to the victims and honestly i’d prefer to forget about them once the job is over. I mean…there are a few that had an impact on me but most are all the same,” she admitted

Ryuk imagined Faye would be shaken by the experience. Not in the way ordinary people are by their first murder, but in a way that would make the onslaught of adrenaline visible. But she remains perfectly cold and detached, so much so she could as well be a death god. To some extent, she is their proxy in this world. Sowing death left and right, never thinking of what’s right or wrong – and she makes no mistake, there is no right or wrong. She does, however, think that she deserves a long and painful death, and that little shred of conscience in her makes the fundamental difference. It makes Ryuk contemplate if he’s ever regretted killing someone. It’s hard to tell as he passes no judgement, and thus his killings are completely arbitrary. Maybe he’s made the mistake of taking out someone too early, when they could have provided some more entertainment. He doesn’t want to make the same mistake with Faye. He will wait until her time runs out.

Following her around the variety of establishments, he has to notice how confined he’d feel had he not have the ability to walk through solid objects like they are nothing. The modern humans follow Protagoras’ words with more zeal than the ancient ones, and it’s quite amazing. Their buildings can be huge, but not as overbearing as, say, an Egyptian palace. But the places Faye visits are far from majesty and splendour, they are more like catacombs, despite being built above the ground. All kinds of nocturnal predators resting in daylight. The box with the precious evidence slides into the chute, and Ryuk is relieved – no one’s tried to stop Faye, no one was too curious about what she has to deliver.

And she’s right, looking unimpressive from the combat standpoint, she has the advantage of surprise attack. If there is anything Ryuk knows for sure, it’s that humans are prone to underestimate each other. He’s seen in the Death Note keepers things no one wanted to see. Some were excellent artists, some died with no one ever hearing their beautiful, powerful voices, and one guy was excellent at solving mathematical equations – while washing dishes in a joint. So Ryuk is sure Faye is full of wonders that she might not even suspect.

“Do you ever feel fear? That you’ll get caught, or get a slug from another gun for hire? I know your fatalist approach, but there are animal instincts. Have you learned to suppress them?”

As for murders being significant, Ryuk has no understanding of it, but a lot of knowledge. Human ascribe incredible things to the simple act of making somebody not alive. Kings were depicted doing it surrounded by air of glory, but no one’s ever praised killers like Faye, those who do the dirty work. Those who made history, made kings great in the first place. It’s kind of sad, isn’t it? But Faye seems to be perfectly okay with it, living in the shadows. Ryuk sees no hubris in her, and is drawn to it.

“Several murders in one day, most have to muster up the courage for one, even in the safety of their rooms, with the Death Note. I think I’ve never met a braver human than you.”

It’s a simple observation. He has yet to see how Faye will deal with the second target.