The Man, The Myth

[He doesn’t miss a beat] 

How does it feel being married to an ancient man?

[Quiet hacking noises and mumbling]

[Well that’s certainly telling.]

I’ll make sure I do that. [Caleb switches his footing, leaning on his other leg to give himself more time on his feet. It’s interesting to have one of Ray’s freelancing monikers dropped so easily- usually it would be gumjobs. Ray hasn’t used Brownman in years.]  Anything else you need to tell me before you disappear into the night?

[He’s tempted to laugh, horribly tempted- the purple and orange, the stocky build, the mask, the sign language- this is the kind of situation Caleb should be allowed to laugh at. He keeps his serious face on anyway.]

I suppose I have to take what I can get, and give as good as I’m given.

Do you mind clearing that up so I can tell my people not to shoot on sight? 

[At least he’s polite about the request.]

Should I take that as a threat?

[There are stupider things to do in Los Santos than threaten Screenlooker, but not very many. Caleb wonders if this is more of a search for a thrill than a threat- usually threats end with him going home with a black eye.] 

I have to give you the same warnings I’d give anyone else; Freelancers don’t last long here without picking a side. I don’t decide what happens to them.

[Caleb doesn’t move to follow the masked man nor does he raise a weapon to him. At Geoff’s insistence, after years of playing harmless, Caleb now carries a pistol when he works. It’s currently safely holstered at the back of his waist, concealed by his shirt. He doesn’t look like he’s going to use it if he’s not openly threatened.]

If you need to leave, please, by all means don’t let me hold you up. [He speaks with a sort of cool, calm disinterest.] But realize that if it’s someone besides me who finds you next time, you may be in deep water without a boat. Bossy Dick doesn’t take well to people making a mess on his streets without permission. Or without reparations. 

No, you can wait two minutes Arya. We’ve got to check on Jeremy. [Matt scoops Arya’s claws out of his pajama pants with a casual, practiced movement and sits down in his desk chair, skipping past the black screen of the building Jeremy had obviously finished with and frowning at losing the connection there. He’ll have to find something else. It doesn’t take too long- a lot of businesses in the area are already on his servers; they’re in the territory, they need looking after. It could be as simple as a bit of traffic…]

[Or it’s an unidentified man holding up Jeremy’s progress; one who quickly becomes identified with a slight turn of the head] Oh, dammit… Don’t get me fired, you late fuck.

Then you’re, what, trying to get noticed?

[Caleb remembers when Mica was trying to get noticed, doing damage in Fake AH territory- but only places she knew they hated, wanted gone… Preemptive strikes. This guy hasn’t exactly been doing that.] If you were, congratulations. You’re kind of hard to forget. [He notices the man looking around and he tries to follow the line of sight in case of back up, but he only sees a couple empty roofs and the corner of a 7-11 with the usual camera. Maybe he can have Matt pull this later, for proof.] 

Oh….

[Caleb watched the man’s hands move and his face changes, a little too focused on the movements, maybe a little too far away. Thank guy the guy’s not actually deaf, since Caleb hasn’t practiced ASL since high school he won’t be able to do anything with his hands, but he vaguely gets ‘yes’ and a sense of ‘what kind of fucking question is that?’ from the signs.]

Then you know that generally it’s frowned upon to play with toys in other people’s sand box. And this is Fake AH Crew’s Sand Box.

I know it is. I know where it starts and where it stops. I’m well versed.

[Why are the masked ones always the silent type? Caleb’s not sure what this guy’s deal is but, well, despite the surprise at least he sort of has a protocol for this. Caleb lowers his shoulders to look less alarmed and crosses his arms, protecting himself and trying to make himself look non-threatening.]

So you… Do know what part of town you’re in, right? [The green logo on Caleb’s baseball cap is a pretty stark reminder] It seems like you’ve been around for a good while.

[Caleb stares at the purple and orange mask with a slight tilt to his head, not trying to let go of any emotion openly on his face. This is… not a recognizable figure. But the damage looks familiar. Caleb had assumed he’d walk into this mess and find Michael, maybe Ryan; that’s why he’d been so casual. This is… a stranger.]

Is the hat really necessary with the mask? [He asks, too confused by his mistake to ask anything sensible to start with.]

You better have a hell of an excuse for this one…

“Now you’re just being silly.” 

Matt rolls his eyes and shifts to lean against Jeremy in return, pulling out his phone to glance at delivery options. He sets it in his lap so Jeremy can see, too. “Getting everything from everywhere would take too long.”

“One day we’ll get everything from everywhere..”

“See? That’s why I said not to bother when I got home and you wanted to do stuff.” Matt says, pushing at Jeremy’s face when he kisses his stomach. “Weirdo. But everything sounds really good. I mean, depending on where we get the everything delivered from.”

Matt nods, smirking. “If it’s gotta be a cat, I want it to be my cat.”

Jeremy shifts and Matt finally stops petting Arya, he can feel her getting antsy on the arm of the couch. She bites his elbow for abandoning her and then hops off and down, probably off to go hijack the water dish. Matt focuses on setting his hand on Jeremy’s neck and rubbing there a little. “We should get take out.” Matt agrees. “Then we don’t have to do anything but get the door.”

“Good, cause Monster Hunter is supposed to be good and I want to make Arya my cat in-game.”

Laughing, Matt lets Jeremy do as he pleases. After days of bending over desks and laptops and scanners he has no problem leaving over his husband on a comfortable couch with no work to do. He’s not going to bend all the way down to try and kiss his forehead, but the sentiment is there in the back of his head.