just your friendly neighborhood geek

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In love with this random guy who had a lock slapped on his storage unit for not paying its rental and not only did he ignore management and took his stuff out without paying, but also chose to steal the lock itself and send it to the LockPickingLawyer along with a confession letter

@theoutcastrogue

People always focus on the "lockpicking" part of his name and ignore that the lockpicking lawyer is, indeed, a lawyer, and can tell you exactly which crimes you committed in getting this lock to him

Charcuterie? More like car-rat-erie.

nice mechanical watches are wasted on wealthy men. a billionaire who will wear it once every four years and leave it in a case the rest of the time doesnt deserve a marvel of engineering like that. *i* deserve a watch like that because i get sexually aroused by clockwork

jokes on you, i have a mechanical watch with transparent windows, which means i can see it ticking, and it (the watch) is just as sexy as you think

you really are out of your league here on all counts. look up the vianney halter deep space resonance and understand my suffering

We have to get normal porn back on this hellsite

nice mechanical watches are wasted on wealthy men. a billionaire who will wear it once every four years and leave it in a case the rest of the time doesnt deserve a marvel of engineering like that. *i* deserve a watch like that because i get sexually aroused by clockwork

jokes on you, i have a mechanical watch with transparent windows, which means i can see it ticking, and it (the watch) is just as sexy as you think

you really are out of your league here on all counts. look up the vianney halter deep space resonance and understand my suffering

We have to get normal porn back on this hellsite

close your eyes and imagine freshly roasted root vegetables perfectly seasoned and crispy as far as the eye can see

Sam trying to get Frodo to take one more step

Sam psychologically tormenting Gollum