𝙰𝙽𝙰𝚂𝚃𝙰𝚂𝙸𝚂𝚃.

supposedly, he can work with this explanation; the doctor might not be born here, but they both find themselves stuck here, so perhaps this really is a sign. maybe, this is the universe’s way of offering him a companion that he has never ( and would only reluctantly ) asked for. ever since his death that wasn’t one, dmitry has found himself traveling through europe in the only manner he knew, sticking to himself and close to the shadows of the city’s he visited; he only showed his face when it was absolutely needed, he didn’t have to take jobs to make money, he knew how to steal and barter for a meal, and he is a skilled locksmith, another skill born more out of necessity than anything else but is those kind of things you learn on the streets. as long as you have a roof over your head, chances are higher you will live to see the next day. or you simply live to see every day now, dmitry thinks gruffly.            ❛ well, what do you wonder about? I, for myself, hope that I will stop waking up to the sensation of being choked to death now. ❜   his features harden to steel once again, watching the frankenstein. does he always wear suits? impractical fashion for a war, but sufficient for a doctor, he theorizes. life has still yet to make a gentleman out of dmitry, who is more used to being a shadow or a soldier than to ever put on that charade again. memories of ballets and paris threaten to overcome him, and he pushes them away. that was then and this is now; no more dreams of princesses. only the dreams of dying men to keep him company at night. sometimes, he misses the freezing winters of saint petersburg     ——      they were never gentle but they were home nonetheless. it never gets quite as cold further west. 

that this would not be an easy road has been clear from the beginning   ,    ever since the doctor began to dream about a man dying in clammy coldness   ,    dying in such a brutal and forceful way that may not have travelled with the news of the rest of the war but that frederick could make out as the same event nonetheless   (    what else would it have been   ,    what with the glimpses of the location and the circumstances of death   )    and ever since then his dreams have been running himself ragged not with the make-belief images of his brother on the battlefield but an entirely other man taking up those rare hours like a film reel stuck on the same scene    ,    over and over again the depths of war-torn memories and agony .  it is by far not the nicest thing to dream about    ,     per se   ,   and yet he took it in stride   ,    took the change of scenery of his nightmares as progress    ,    especially when he began to figure out what it means     -    it could never hurt to go searching    ,    the scholar that he is thriving under such a task .  death has come and gone by his own hand more often than it hasn’t   ,   and yet this meeting is the first thing that seems to be a breakthrough .   “   i have wondered about the dreams of course    -    first the same man and the same location .  then the same man and other’s location   ,    as if watching a life .  of course   ,   i could put two things together  :   that i somehow couldn’t die anymore and that you were a constant in my dreams .   ”   watching the other man   ,    the soldier   ,    he can sense that the situation makes him a similar shade of uneasy that he can detect in himself    ,    which is no surprise at all .   how would somebody go at meeting someone else who can‘t seem to die?   it is ironic that frederick’s supposed counterpart is a soldier   ,    out of all things .   a soldier   ,    the one thing he could and would never want to be  ,  but he also couldn’t find much more than curious ambivalence for the other man   ,   and maybe an odd sensation at having found him at all .   “  well   ,    we don’t know what happens when we meet   ,    do we?  though i could also do with less   ...   hectic dreams .   chocked to death   ,    you say?  so you never dreamed about anything else    -    or anyone else?   ” 

beauty next to age   ——   oh   ,   how the comment makes the ex - thief’s heart sing. he was doing all that he could not to draw too much attention than they already were   ,   always forever concerned about frederick’s well being   &   not wanting these judgmental pricks to further disturb him. to have him want to walk beside him rather than walk ahead of him   ——   newt knows how monumental that is   ,   perhaps the biggest gesture of love the doctor could ever bestow besides saying it out loud. charming confidence wanes for a moment as he locks eyes with well known grays   ,   the ever flowing words finally dying in his throat   ,   forcing him to remain silent. the moment is only a few seconds but it feels longer as they stand in the doorway   ,   finally able to break the smallest of smiles   ,   nodding as he waits until they can both exit the winery together   ,   his hand still lightly pressed against his arm. he truly meant it when he said he enjoyed it when frederick spoke   ,   but he especially loved just spending time with him   ,   something he had almost forgotten during those years he spent apart. god   ,   why did i ever leave him again   ?   nowhere felt quite as much as home as it did when in the doctor’s presence  ,   a realization that only makes that smile of his grow even more   ,   his heart bursting inside his chest   ,   the sudden desire to kiss him now apparent in glassy emeralds. of course   ,   newt wound’t dare cross that barrier just yet   ,   especially after having just dealt with so much stress in that damn winery. it was always better to let the doctor lead   ,   (   as if love   &   romance was like a long   ,   drawn out tango   ;   constantly encircling each other as they moved as one   )   as it allowed him the opportunity to get comfortable in his own way without accidentally harming him. the ex - thief has done many bad things throughout his life   ,   but he refuses to harm the doctor anymore than he already has in the past. thankfully   ,   the heat he feels in his cheeks cools down as the brisk air hits them   ,   now completely out of sight of all of frederick colleagues. it makes newt feel more at ease at the realization   ,   releasing his hold on the doctor’s arm   &   stuffing his hands into his own jacket pockets.   ❝   i’m glad you do … you know   ,   like to indulge me i guess. pretty sure it’s obvious you know i like to indulge you too. your happiness is kind of my happiness. always has been   ,   &   definitely always will be.   ❞  it’s not quite a profession of love   ,   but it’s definitely damn close to one   ,   letting his energy ramp up a bit as he bounces on the balls of his heels a bit before walking forward   ,   though careful to stay at the doctor’s side. if he wants to walk alongside him   ,   then who is he not to oblige   ?   ❝   &   hey   ,   italian sounds damn good   &   kind of appropriate after all that shitty wine. maybe we can get something that’ll get that dry flavor out of our mouths   ,   plus i could go for some veal   ,   or even a nice   ,   simple risotto.   ❞   with a sigh   ,   newt looks up at the slowly setting sky   ,   the orange   &   pink glow a gorgeous shade against the blue sky   ——   a promising view for a much more promising evening. turning to look at frederick again   (   a favorite pastime to be certain   )   ,   he reaches out once more   ,   hand gently tugging at the sleeve of his coat with a soft tenderness. the gesture could easily be seen as him simply adjusting his clothes   ,   but his gaze says another story   ,   one he hopes frederick will read   &   kindly bestow   ,   but he knows well not to hope too much. all good things comes to those who wait.   ❝   hey.   ❞   he starts off slow   ,   letting silence fall for a bit before continuing.   ❝   i hope you won’t let those guys get to you. they’re all a bunch of judgmental crackpots who probably have done waaaay worse shit than call off an engagement. hell   ,   i wouldn’t be surprised if they’re all in terrible marriages that they didn’t want to be apart of. you were just smart enough to actually not go through with yours. if anything   ,   maybe they’re a little jealous.   ❞   eyes remain on the doctor’s features   ,   hoping he can find some comfort in his words. it’s all he wants   ——   to alleviate some of his stress   ,   to be a source of happiness   ,   a light in his life.   ❝   but whatever it is that’s going on in their noggins   ,   just don’t take it seriously. you’re better than all of them   ——   the best damn doctor   &   surgeon ever. you might say it’s my bias for you talking   ,   but i’m totally serious. you are   &   that’s a fact   &   no matter what   ,   you will always be better.   ❞   a pause.   ❝   you’re a good man   ,   frederick. i know you say you’re not   ,   but you are to me   &   i think that matters for something   ,   right   ?   ❞

they have become a little milder after amsterdam    ,     after antwerp   ,    the terror and stress of those few days    (    as well as the general catalyst for too many emotions for his likings   )    having smoothed out in the months afterwards and having found something of a middle ground when they decided to settle down in new york again      -     coming back together more than falling apart again     ,    now that newt has been back in his life frederick was sensible not to give him up again .   it might be the only sensible decision he ever made   ,    although he prides himself of being the most sensible of men .  living a life basically running   ,    looking over one’s shoulder at every turn   ,    in a constant state of permafrost and guilt will do that to one’s disposition after several years like locked away and into this    ,     will turn one into a more twisted person than one might think    -    or maybe not    ,    maybe he turned exactly into the person one would turn into in such special circumstances    -   but nonetheless it is why he found some pride in it   ,    as quiet and somber as it is when it comes to him .   progression    ,    change    ,    have always been the very few words    ,     the one thing   ,    that his life has seemed to be sure of   ,    may it be devastating changes or professional progression or something lying in the middle    ,    but the glacier-paced one he is going through now at the hands of the thief is one he has found he needed to become accustomed to but one he wanted more than anything else    ,    one he even welcomed into his life .  he wanted to better his life    ,     wanted to find a reason for his to continue   ,    and it has been the events in amsterdam that have truly inspired him to try       -      and to only try with newt at his side .   it may seem illogical   ,    unreasonable    ,     but he could only say that he has never been of sounder mind than when he made the decision in antwerp    ,     and he has not regretted it ever since .   the other man has been nothing but supportive   ,    attentive    ,   and careful and caring towards him    ,    which is something frederick does feel adamant gratitude for and he hopes he can bring across sometimes    ,     and he knows he could never pay it back in kind    ,    not how they settled their old score with the painting’s journey and its retrieval   ,    their coming and goings in and out of the other’s live mended through it too .   two waves under different moons    ,     and yet they always found to manage the same sky .   he has long given up to only think of it as a coincidence   ,    or lucky chance .    as lucky as he may be with newt    ,    he knows very well it was not by chance .    letting the shorter man settle into step next to him is taken with the most neutral reaction his body could ever have for these moments   (   he thinks   ,    he is still working on it    ,    probably works on it for the rest of his life    )    ,     but it has always been easier with newt   ,    easier to let him in and stay in that space    ,    easier to keep him .      “   i love indulging you    ,     i do   ,   ”   he reassures the other man once more   ,    emphasising his words again    ,   looking over in a short glance .   and it is true   ,    there is nothing he loves more than giving something of himself to newt   ,   or sharing something with him   ,    or letting himself be lead by him .   it is the only connection he knows he could ever want with someone   ,    and he has found it   ,    has it right here .    “   italian it is .   for some better wine alone .   do you think we will find something in the next few blocks or should we go to one of the places we know?   ”    he asks then    ,     nearly absent-minded   ,    his mind already ahead on its course with what the thief has said   ,    and when newton touches the sleeve of his coat he stops in his tracks   ,    stopping the other man in turn    ,   something shockingly fierce and bright beginning to flow in his chest    ,   melting the ice there to water   ,    water   ,   water .   cold gray meets brightest   ,    warmest green   ,    and he can feel himself softening some more all over again .   it is a continuous spring .    “    you      -      you do make me happy .    i know i don’t say it often enough to assume you already know it    ,    but you do .   you make me happier than anything in my life has ever made me .    the fact that you make me happy at all is a miracle in itself .  and i know for a fact i might not be a good man    ,     and it’s something that stopped bothering me a long time ago    ,    but it does matter what you think of me    -   to me   ,   i mean .   more than anybody else’s opinion .  i don’t care what these people think of me    ,    i never have    ,    i only care about the things they’d say about you    ,    because they are wrong .   ”   averting his gaze for a moment   ,     he takes a deep breath before he lets the palm of his hand slide over the back of newt’s for a moment   ,     the seconds feeling endless as he does so .    “    you are lovely and kind and good   ,     you have a good heart   ,    newton   ,  and you have kept me sane inside there .  and the only thing that matters to me is that .  i just wanted to say that   ,    i wanted you to hear it from me .   ”    and with that   ,    he carefully loosens the touch on newt’s hand and turns away   ,    knowing that what he’d actually want to do next might not be possible yet .

there’s a pang of guilt that hits newt deep for a moment as he watches the doctor’s movements   ,   well aware that he bears no fault for the result of this evening   ,   but he can’t help but still feel somewhat responsible. how many countless times as he thought about what if   ?   what life might have been like had he not left frederick when he did   ,   if he actually stayed   &   weathered the remainder of the storm that the young man was going through   ,   how much of a different person he could have been if he had just been there to support him   ,   hold his hand   ?   it does him no good to think about things he cannot change   ,   but newt was always thinking of all the possibilities   ,   the scientist in him still present even after all this time   ,   wishing he could have laid out all the variables   &   chosen the one that would have left him less hurt. guilt will forever be a constant companion in newt’s life   ——   his penance for not staying when he should have   ,   but at least he was here now   ,   able to make up his wrongdoings   &   have the skull painting returned back into rightful hands   ,   allowing the doctor a chance to breathe   ,   to live. now reunited   ,   they could make up for lost time in however way they pleased   ,   &   truth be told   ,   the last place he wanted to do that was here. frederick may look the part of a stuffy shirt doctor   (   a good looking one at least   ,   though that’s newt’s own opinion   )   ,   but he certainly didn’t belong with this lot   ,   something newt would forever argue if anyone were to contradict him. smile grows just a touch as the doctor teases him for his use of words   ,   noting the brief rise of his lips   ,   though he’s confident that it would have shined through had they not been here. time to make like a banana   &   get the fuck out of here.   ❝   well   ,   i can be a poet whenever the mood strikes   &   it’s probably my bias for you talkin’   ,   but you kinda put me in a good mood all the time   ,   ❞   newt teases back   ,   shoulder gently nudging into frederick’s   ,   a gesture so innocent   ,   so familiar   ——   it’s like they’re back in vegas all over again. even though the guilt from that time of their lives will never leave   ,   he had to admit   ,   some of his happiest memories happened back in that strange   ,   sinful city   ,   all of them with frederick   &   him only. no one managed to make him feel so at home   ,   so loved as he does   ——   he may not say his feelings often   ,   but the way he shows it in small ways is enough for newt to be happy   ,   content to live on only this for the rest of his days if that’s all he’s meant to get.   ❝   aw   ,   c’mon frederick   ,   i don’t wanna do that. besides   ,   i feel like you indulge in german cuisine with me more than you actually want to. you’re the one having a rough time   ,   so i want you to choose the place. it’s still pretty early   ,   so i could prooooobably call up a restaurant   &   book something for a little bit later. might mean we’ll need to walk around town a little bit   ,   but i don’t mind. you know me   ,   i like to hoof it every now   &   then   ——   that’s when you think up the best thoughts   ,   or remember the best memories.   ❞   newt’s smiles shines through once again   ,   wide   &   inviting   ,   perhaps the only vibrant   ,   positive thing in the whole damn room. yeesh   ,   tough crowd. this place really is just awful   ,   huh   ?   if i had to deal with these stiffs   ,   i think i’d be miserable too. yeah   ,   definitely time to get frederick out of here for his sanity’s sake   ,   the ex - thief now determined to turn his mood around. with a soft pat to his arm   ,   newt motions frederick to follow him as he crosses the room toward the exit   ,   already noting the whispers   &   stares they were getting   ,   but newt could care less. if anything   ,   their gossiping only made newt stare back   ,   not at all afraid by this so called   ‘   high class   ‘   crowd who probably think they’re better than him. tch   ,   not to toot my own horn   ,   but i’ve probably made more money than most of them ever have in a few months. true   ,   his money was earned from doing   ‘   this   &   that   ,   ‘   but that’s beside the point. with his hand on the doorknob   ,   he waits for frederick to approach closer before he lets the door swing open   ,   holding it for him with a cheeky grin   ,   other free hand motioning like some sort of fancy apartment doorman.   ❝   come on   ,   frederick   ,   ❞   he whispers in a low tone   ,   not wanting to draw too much attention. normally he wouldn’t care   ,   but for frederick’s he’d be subtle for once. only for him.   ❝   the night is young   &   we are so not wasting it here. you first   ——   age before beauty.  ❞   he winks.

freedom comes in the form of earnest green eyes   ,    it has always come this way .   even in hist angriest    ,    even in his coldest and deadest    ,    his most tragic moments it has been newton’s presence that has given him an out to all the suffering he seemingly was supposed to go through in this life .   as penance   ,    he has often thought and especially the few years before he met his only friend again    ,    as a punishment for killing everyone and everything around him   ,    infecting it with the death residing in himself like a spreading plague that was uncontainable .   and only ever to be stopped by newt slipping through all his defences and dismantling the curse   ,    bringing a cure .  the how has never been of much question or thought for frederick   ,   having known that to find an answer for someone or something as futile and rare as newton’s presence in his life at just the right moments he needed it would become the impossible try to solve an impossible equation .   what has always mattered more is the effect it had on him   ,    or newt had on him   (   still does   )    ,    and how apparently he made frederick feel     -    the good and the bad   ,    ecstasy as well as belonging and then so much thinly veiled rage and longing that he could never say exactly what was lying itself like a web into his veins   ,    what that resided under his skin belonged to him and what were long lost parts for newt to pick up shall he ever return .   not that frederick had held out a lot of hope   ,    he has always been more prone to realism    ,    to pessimism   ,    and so he just knew to resign himself to the ever-present lack in himself   ,    another one but that would make him unavailable for any other relationship one could ever expect him to be a part of .   gaze flickering back over at the man who claimed so much of his emotional availability   ,    he replies   ,    “    well    ,    you certainly are the first person who thinks my talk is a benefactor for your mood .   the rest of the world begs to differ .   ”   it is not meant in harshness   ,    or self-deprecating   ,    but just another truth that he already faced back in college    :     people did not respond to his voice or words kindly    ,    and he didn’t need them to   ,    still doesn’t .   of course   ,    the thief is the exception to this as he is to every rule in frederick’s rulebook .  another touch to his arm   ,    and the doctor takes it willingly for once   ,   allowing newt to alert him and then to lead the way out   ,    actively ignoring the people that are very obviously giving him    -    giving them    -    a critical look on his way out .  once they are by the door   ,    he can’t help the return of the ghost of a smile at newt’s little comment in return to the other man’s open grin   ,   more than grateful for the excuse to not only look at him once more but to also leave with him .   never has loneliness felt so unattractive   ,    this change in his demeanour only moved by newt’s return and the extraordinaire impact he always and still has on frederick   ,    the way he softens so much of him like no one else can .   who’d knew there are such sides inside of him   ,    now returned to the surface in such a loving manner he thought he’d never be capable or deserving of?   once they meet the cool night air   ,    he waits for newt to fall into step with him .    “  beauty next to age  ,   if you’d do me the honour  ,   ”  he says then  ,   something finally easing in his chest away from the crowd of people   ,   something locking back into place at only having to be around the one person he wants around   ,    softening him considerably once more .   “   i know you like the food   ,    and i know i love to indulge you    ,     so it is no hardship for me   ,    i have you know .  but would you be up for italian   ,    maybe?   there’s enough of them open to still get a moderately nice table .   if not   ,    we can also take a walk and go home .   ”

a curious noise leaves his throat, deep and low; he can’t quite decide if he should like the stranger from his dreams or if he simply finds him plan rude. which, it takes a lot to appear rude to the russian, short-tempered, impatient and often coming off coolly as well, but he does not like the tone in the doctor’s voice all that much. FREDERICK, well, the name was easy to remember, and he makes a mental note to look up the frankenstein name; he never paid it much attention beyond the novel, never even paid the book attention to begin with       ——      he thought it was fictional, to be entirely honest but apparently that bloodline was not just the product of some genius woman’s imagination; apparently it is a real family, and based on dmitry’s observation their heir must also be ………. immortal. perhaps, if dreams of a hanged man are any indication of that. unconsciously, he taps against the base of his throat, if only to make sure he is still breathing.            ❛ of course russian, ❜  dmitry spits out, hoisting his gun a little higher, tightening his grip; his shoulder holster is digging into the fabric of his sweater. at least he is not covered in grime, small miracles.            ❛ and you are an american doctor. what brings you to europe? ❜  

bad blood can’t lie where no blood flows    ,    it is the simplest and most universal fact that might have swapped over into philosophical territory he liked to stay clear of generally .  but the distaste in the russian man’s demeanour is one obvious even to someone as cooled down   ,    as borderline numb   ,    as frederick .   it is not something he takes personal   ,    has long learned to surpass the minuscule waste of self-importance in that regard to rather put it to good use in other places   ,    and he would not start now out of courtesy for the only other person seemingly stuck in the same timely loophole he has found himself in after his visit to transylvania .  there has been other moments he had let himself sink into darkness   ,    the first of them all willing tries to test the theory   ,    the rest of them merely side effects of his medical work   ,   foregoing the ethical code of not conducting self-research when he only had himself at hand in the sweeping nothingness of romania .   “   it was not meant as an insult   ,   neither as a threat   ,  ”  comes the calm reply  ,   something monotone and slow in the words   -   how to work with a dangerous animal .   then   ,    a the sliver of a shrug follows   ,    the doctor not one to deny explanation after having gotten one in return .  if they really are the only two people like them in the world   ,    then he could be civil .   “   relocated .  my family is european  ,   swiss actually .  a recently deceased relative also left their place behind for me to inherit in transylvania .  call it lucky timing   ,   i suppose .  i haven’t gone back to the states yet . see  ,   i hadn’t dreamed of anything but the same dream for years now  ,  and then all of sudden your face appeared every time .  it has a man wondering  ,  considering the other circumstances .   ”

despite what many may think about the former thief   ,   he does have his moments of seriousness whenever the occasion called for it. most of the time he prefers to abide by a more carefree way of living   ,   but seeing his partner so visibly uncomfortable with his surroundings makes him really worry   ,   brows knitting together as his once quirky smile is flipped upside down. it’s always been like this   ,   newt immediately dropping his goofy behavior in favor of  helping frederick feel okay again   ,   remembering all the times he’s somehow managed to get him to a somewhat functioning state back in vegas. it always took a lot of trying   &   patience   ,   but lucky for him   ,   newt was pretty good at being patient   ,   but only for him. seeing him snark back   ,   seeing him smile   ,   even if it was the briefest of smiles was always what made it all worth it in the end. newt’s never told frederick this   ,   but his smile just might be the best thing he’s ever laid eyes on in all his years of living. it’s rare   &   hardly ever seen in public   ,   but when in private   ,   seeing even the tiniest of grins never failed to make the ex - thief’s heart skip a beat   ,   feeling rather proud that he was really the only one who could make him feel this way. he’s the only who makes me feel this way too. fuck   ,   what did he do when i wasn’t around to help him   ?   pushing that suddenly frightening thought aside   ,   newt quickly notices how the doctor shifts closer toward him   ,   the hand he had on his arm loosening its grip in favor of reaching for frederick’s wine glass   ,   setting it down the nearest table   ,   his own soon joining it. if he wasn’t feeling well   ,   maybe drinking very gross   ,   cheap wine wasn’t the best idea   &   the last thing either of them needed was for frederick to get actually sick   &   cause a scene. these yuppie fucks were already giving them nasty glares   &   whispered comments   ——   no need to give them more material to gossip about.   ❝   it’s okay   ,   frederick   ,   you don’t have to explain.   ❞   ex - thief’s words takes on a strange   ,   low   &   weighty tone   ,   his own eyes glaring at the group that had just passed them   ,   as if almost challenging them to say something rather than just cowardly walk off. fucking assholes.   ❝   hey   ,   maybe we should just skedaddle on out of here   ,   huh   ?   head over to some place with real wine   &   real food that isn’t that weird   ,   cheap shit brie they’re trying to feed us.   ❞   newt scoffs   ,   followed by a quiet laugh. just because he doesn’t look like the rest of the group doesn’t mean he has taste. he’s been all over the world in just a few years   ——   he likes to think he has an excellent palate   ,   thank you very much. his hand gently pats the doctor’s arm   ,   the touch brief   &   non - invasive.   ❝   you came   ,   you saw   ,   you conquered. c’mon   ,   an early dinner   &   an early night in is what i think you need. seriously frederick   ,   if you’re not feeling well   ,   you don’t gotta force it. ‘course   ,   i’m with you no matter what you decide.   ❞   now that we found each other again   ,   i am not letting you go.

it is another dire instance of life happening around him and him declining every opportunity to join it    ,     now even more reluctant than he was before but only because he has found a substitute that he did not have all those years before .  he knows he is just like those people he distastes around him   ,   knows the air they breathe naturally is the same one he has become a man in    ,    knows the prestigious classrooms he used to sit in have been foreboding for this type of behaviour   ,    a cesspool    ,    his own confined torture space   ,   for people like him and people he hated to turn out even worse than they already were   ,    to refine everything that is already wrong with them .   it has turned him into static    ,     a flat line where there used to be a pulse    ,    and it has turned his peers into louder   ,    brasher    ,    bolder versions of themselves    -   more dislikable too    ,    owning their pride and their youth all up into their late twenties and early thirties with an air of arrogance that surpasses him in poisonous quantity .   he would not see himself as far better   ,    just a different violent thing   ,    violently quiet    ,    already turned sour before these people could get their metaphorical hands and their literal words on him .  he has only ever allowed one other person besides his brother to move him    ,    to cut away at his bone   ,    and the lesson has felt definite enough to not let anybody else have room to even try .   (    you chose your preferred   ,    personal hell all by yourself   ,   no second input needed .  )   the skull   ,    it seems   ,   has shielded him from this kind of worst behaviour in the same way it threw him into another .   he should be so grateful   ,    at least for the man by his side now   ,   a touch on his arm that does not have him wretch or snarl      -   it is the miracle of life personified .  heaven and hell so very close together .   looking at newton now   ,   eyes flickering over his face for a second before paying him full attention   ,   he finds himself less surprised than he used to be that the german is throwing him the life raft here   ,    and a rope alongside it to boot .  newt has always been his saving grace as much as his achilles heel    ,    so is the history of love known to mankind .   he was young and impressionable enough to fall fool for it too   ,    but it seems to have been meant for him after all .    “   somehow you using the word   ‘   skedaddle  ’  makes me feel better   ,    that is a first   ,   ”   he comments   ,   quirk to the corner of his mouth .   it feels like it has been millennia since he last showed a sign of emotions when it was just a few hours ago when he helped newt with the collar of his shirt    ,    kissed him even before they left their place .   “    yes   ,    leaving sounds like a good idea .   ”    somehow the initiative has been absent in his mind until now   ,    the choke-hold of his past torment through the whole of these events so strong on him until green eyes snapped him out of it .   “   you can even take me to one of those german places you like   ,    anything but this   ,    really .  although i am sure i will not hear the end of it come monday morning .  but i could not    -   please   ,    let us leave .  i insist .  ”

it is decidedly unsettling to see a man that has been a fixture in your dreams for quite some time now standing in front of you. in his dreams, it is all DEATH, dead, d e a t h, but here he is, living and breathing, sharp and angular; he once read that the people you see in your dreams are faces you have seen before, but he is quite sure that if he would have passed the stranger on a street, he would have definitely remembered. dmitri shifts as if under a heavy weight, and it is true     ——     something unbearably heavy has been resting on his shoulders and wearing him down ever since he died in that god forsaken war in spain for the first time. what is happening to him? he hasn’t figured it out yet. maybe this familiar man knows more than he does; apparently, he is not the only one recognizing the children of the idle dreams he has been having. 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒚, 𝒊 𝒑𝒓𝒂𝒚 𝒚𝒐𝒖.           ❛ i suppose so, ❜ the man’s accent is crisp and clearly american, whereas dmitry’s own lilts and stumbles around foreign words.         ❛ you have been in my dreams. my name is dmitri.  ❜

one would think the chance of meeting pure luck   ,    a row of stars aligning and making the world work in mysterious ways in their favour    ,    and maybe it is like that    (    maybe some people would see it so    )    ,    but frederick has never been a man of leaving things up to chance .   once the dreams started   ,    once the never-dying started    ,     it only took him so long before he began investigating not only the cause of it    ,    but also the whereabouts of the face he saw die over and over again .   the language was a dead giveaway   ,     so was the location   ,    and the most reasonable thing he might have ever done was setting of to geneva again before scoring through europe to find the mysterious soldier    -    who seems to be more soldier in name than in appearance .    “  and you have been in mine   ,   ”   the doctor agrees   ,   looking the man once-over .    “  dmitri .  russian   ,   i figure?  you spoke it most of the time   ,    when i could hear you over the artillery .  frederick  ,   frederick frankenstein .  i am a doctor .   ”

it’s not that he hasn’t been to a winery before   ,   uncle illia made sure he had that experience tucked away   ,   but something about the whole vibe of this particular place just didn’t seem right to him. he definitely felt out of place   ,   &   probably looked it too compared to the other high class   ,   stuffed shirts walking across the room. there’s no way these people were friends of frederick’s   ——   they all seemed far too into themselves   &   their own pursuits to even be remotely close to the doctor aside from just being other fellow doctors he knows in passing   (   hell   ,   does frederick even have friends outside of him   ?   ).   green eyes shift around the room as he takes a hearty sip from his own glass   ,   turning to look at his lover   &   quickly coming to a conclusion he has already assessed rather quickly upon his arrival :   he definitely didn’t belong here   &   frankly   ,   neither did frederick.   ❝   yeesh   ,   tough crowd. i think i got side - eyed for making a comment about the wine being a little dry.   ❞   even still   ,   he takes another sip   ,   concern still fixated on the doctor’s features. a hand comes to rest on his arm   ,   gently tugging at the sleeve of his wool coat.   ❝   hey   ,   you know i’d do anything for you   ,   even weather a sea of tight - lipped prick doctors   ,   no offense.   ❞   he winks.   ❝   but uh   ,   can’t help but realize you look a little … uneasy. you okay   ,   or what   ?   talk to me   ,   babe. let me in on how you’re feelin’.   ❞

                                @revivescos· sent : 🍷 - 𝐆𝐎 𝐓𝐎 𝐀 𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐘