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the plot chickens

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catgirl-kaiju

so this knight came to my wizard's tower one day and asked me to cast a spell that would allow him to take his beloved princess' hand in marriage. pretty typical this kind of wish, and i had just the spell. a combo of "turn person into a royal" and "transform appearance to match romantic ideal", easy. he paid handsomely for it too, so how can i says no?

turns out his princess is a lesbian and nobody knew, so when i cast the spell it made him into a beautiful princess. she asked for a refund right away and begged me (cryin', held me at swordpoint) to turn her back, but i says to her, i says, "The die has already been cast, and your fate is now sealed!" which is my way of sayin' "no refunds".

turns out, bein' a princess weren't so bad for her and she was able to take her sweet and beloved princess' hand in marriage. seems like everything worked out.

but then, surprise of my life, they both show up to my tower and my spell was undone. some dark sorcerer shithead (some kinda sketchy royal adviser who wanted to usurp the throne, a million like 'im) had removed my enchantments and turned our princess back into a knight. but she didn't want to be a man no more and asked me to redo the spell. gladly i changed her back in exchange for fuckin' up this sorcerer shmuck, (could be a threat to my business, you see) gave 'er an enchanted sword an everything. to my shock, the other princess takes the sword and vows to get this guy for me.

now i got all this guy's magic shit and good graces for life with the queens of the land, plus the best advertisement money can't buy. "yes, i am in fact That wizard from the story of the princess knight!" classic.

anyway, all that to say, no i ain't changin' yous back. you'll be mommy's pretty little maid and you'll like it.

#the subtle implication of a philly accent is really good #this wizard lives in a city with a long history of labor organizing

setulose

Trace amounts of Monica in my life

setulose

A statistically insignificant level of Monica in my life

setulose

My life manufactured in a facility that also processes Monica

#a homeopathic dosage of Monica in my life

stateownedslut

Marxists understand that the way to abolish class is not by ignoring it; rather, the goal is to render everybody a proletarian, a class that has in its interests only the final abolition of class; or, to paraphrase cinema's most correct villain, 'When everybody is a prole, nobody will be!' Similarly, family abolitionists must understand that the only way forward is not to restrict the family; we can abolish it only by putting everybody in such a position that it is in their interests to do so; or, in other words, the goal of socialism is to turn everybody into a daughter.

ispyspookymansion

i like a trans headcanon as much as the next guy but sometimes it really boils down to “that character has not had enough agency and/or introspective freedom in their life to have transitioned by the time we meet them in their story”

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cookiethebirddoll

oh yeah rice cooker get that hot steam aaaaaalll over those wooden cabinets oh yeah my little steam slut

princessdraconic

Are dragons innately yandere?

2. - Oh god, that's bad. Surely I can think of something better.

bokkombap

I miss you

audioexorcisms

Lets dissect uncle to find his wish gland

theirisianprincess

#half heartedly going for a walk #not because you want to #but because you know it’ll be good for you #asumi-chan is interested in lesbian brothels

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loreleywrites

im always saying this

ggcrono

tamamita

Mahiro is like a friend that shows up on dash every now and then

doctor-nu

avi--arts

6.29.26

please tell me this is as funny as i think it is for a print

empress-em-kaldwin

maid who reads theory on her breaks finds out about the "dustbin of history" and gets ever-so-slightly obsessed

empress-em-kaldwin

heaven help me my household staff are vanguardists

t00thpasteface

nothing online is ever truly deleted. except that one fucking thing you're looking for

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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melodies-stereo

sometimes merely existing in the world as a trans woman with principles makes me feel like i'm going insane. what do you mean people think prisons are a good thing. what do you mean diverting from monogamy is considered ludicrous. what do you mean people think one's nature is unchangeable. what is considered 'normal' by the overwhelming majority of people is fucking topsy-turvy land to me. i dont understand it at all

#some people out there support private ownership of the means of production

badwitchmarisa

having a crush is so embarrassing like. you got me pregnant. with feelings. just by hanging out. Are you going to take responsibility for our child.

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