"If he doesn’t go too far or stays with us, I don’t see what the big problem is? I mean, we’re probably not supposed to be battling with ‘em either, and look what we did a few weeks ago!"

"...Fine, but what does he eat? If he's going to keep following me around we can't let him starve."

"Why d’you want him gone? He’s not causing you any trouble, is he?"

"OW! .... There is that, too."

"Wiiiiiiiiiiiith?"

Dark Pit holds up a very tiny hamster-like pokémon that looks like it should be plugged into a wall somewhere. "Make it stop."

"Eh, no Light in front of it. He’s just Pit. Look like me but… in white. And —— you know, you’re the first person to ever ask that?"

"Ooooh, okay." Blink, blink. "Wait, I am?! You’d think everyone would! What’s with the people in your world?! How rude!”

"They're more interested in coming up with stupid nicknames."

"You didn’t, did you? I’m Dark Pit."

"Hee, Dark Pit? That’s a cool name! Is there a Light Pit running around out there somewhere out there? Oh, do you prefer Dark or the full thing if that’s the case?"

"Eh, no Light in front of it. He's just Pit. Look like me but... in white. And ---- you know, you're the first person to ever ask that?"

"…I never actually did get your name, did I? Oops! I’m sorry!"

"You didn't, did you? I'm Dark Pit."

"Not that I can say much better about my world, I guess. There’s no one persistent bad guy or anything but the gods get angry at each other and fight all the time, and the rest of us get caught up in their messes. Which… since they’re gods? Those messes are pretty big. And deadly.”

“Aww, it’s not that bad. You could say any world’s a deathtrap if you really tried! Though… I sure wouldn’t like to get caught up in a god’s power struggles… That sounds pretty rough to deal with. Isn’t there a way they can all just get along?”

"It all sounds weird, I know, but it’s not a deathtrap! As long as Sonic is around, everything’ll be okay! Eggman’s kinda a joke, even if his plans are really awful. Sonic beats him all the time, and it’s not gonna change anytime soon! My world’s actually really beautiful, too… You should visit Apotos someday! There’s this really nice ice cream vendor who makes the best chocolate chip sundae supremes ever, and the scenery is so pretty! All the houses are white, and it’s an island, right? So seeing all that off the water… Ahh, it’s so romantic!"

"Not that I can say much better about my world, I guess. There's no one persistent bad guy or anything but the gods get angry at each other and fight all the time, and the rest of us get caught up in their messes. Which... since they're gods? Those messes are pretty big. And deadly."

"Yep! That happened once. See, apparently it’s a natural occurrence happening like… millions of years apart? There’re these two planetary spirits, right? Dark Gaia and Light Gaia. When Dark Gaia wakes up, he splits the planet into pieces. Then Light Gaia fixes it and beats him and go they back to sleep. Eggman went n’ woke Dark Gaia up early some time back, and tried to control him to take over the world and stuff… Light Gaia ended up with Sonic, and Sonic helped put the world back together and save the day! Then Light Gaia went back to sleep… It’s kinda sad. I liked him. We called him Chip! But man, Dark Gaia exerting his influence over people was scary! He possessed all these people and made them act really weird— Even Professor Pickle’s assistant!"

Here he'd thought his home was weird, but this was a whole new level of strange. "Not even unusual for you? What kinda deathtrap do you and Sonic come from, anyway?"

"Can do! After all, I’ve got this should something get weird! I know I’m cute, but no one’s gonna get the drop on me!”

Forget the hammer Amy, his attention is all on that concept.

"But yeah… I can see why they’re so big on stranger danger in school these days now…"

"Yeah I'd... watch your step around that one." And he's really, really glad he brought his bow. Just in case.

               ❝ …is there a mackerel god?❞     or maybe that was just wishful thinking.

"…at least I think that’s old for a human. They don’t live very long, right?”

“Well, he looks way older than I am, at least! I thought he was just being friendly… But now I’m a little creeped out, yeah.”

“Y… You don’t?”

"...at least I think that's old for a human. They don't live very long, right?"