Vince's Journal

AHHH (opening thought, no context available)

OMG Cash’s mom and Absolute. 

OMG The deadman’s switch for the exploding ship

“Level 1 harm” “Yeah, free, I’ll take it.” MOOD. 

“As someone who has a fairly serious sprain.” I WAS thinkinga bt that but I wasn’t sure when the timeline of it was

“A home without two grenade launchers is just a house.” GOD

A ONE AND A SIX, DYLAN!

OH NO A DESPARATE THREE

“I wanna curl into a ball and die” oh buddy

“I was sitting here trying to figure out how I could finish this arc alone” LMAO ROMAN

OH A HELL OF A DEVIL’S BARGAIN

GOO PEOPLE GOO SOLDIERS GOO PEOPLE GOO SOLDIERS

“What do you put a weird space god in?” “A sippy cup?” 😂I love you, Christine

GOD AND ANIMUM. CHRISTINE. CHRISTINE THAT’S SO FUCKIN GOOD. 

God what a cool fucking scene

“God forbid you save my life on purpose, Cash Black” GOD

“Now I don’t know which of your eyes was scarier” OOOOOOOOOOOH GODDAMN I said “OOOH” out LOUD

wow that’s very specific

flashback. Why would he... was he just not READY to tell him about Lorelai? I guess it was a bad venue... anyway, I don’t get why they’re controlling Luke. Hmm... That one guy said he put some kind of puppet seal on Van, which means they ARE interested in control but why? Actually judging by Symphonia it’s something I can’t guess at.

okay.................seems needlessly evil to me, what’s the angle

huh

HMM

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

HMMMM

LUKE YOU NEED FRIENDS MATE THIS IS CLASSIC AHHH

AHHHHHHH

I gotta respect that they made this guy look like Mr. Miyagi. The hair is like exact except for how it sticks out.

She’s an archer? That’s fun! wow I CANNOT believe how much of a sucker I am. Someone puts on a quiver and I’m like: 😍😍

Ohhhh ho ho MORE CLEMENTINE KESH VIBES FOR VINCE!!

A N I S E!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh my fucking GOD I 

Jade you’re such a messy bitch oh my god 😂ily mate

I LOVE HER

This pose omg

WHAT

WHAT

Hmmm what do you know, Jade?

AH

you blazed like torches/

Oh sick

OH??????????

😔😔hate when the symbol looks like a curse slot

OH. 

...is Guy resistant because he already lives with a curse slot? But who wields it???

Oh RUDE tumblr ate a lot of my post!!! WELL!!! SHUCKS

The gist is: WOW NATALIA IS DOING A LOT OF GOOD HERE WOW LOTS OF THEORY NOW I’M HERE 

It didn’t even occur to me that her name was abbreviated. ALSO FOOLISH REPLICA LUKE! RUDE!

Ahhhhhhh I didn’t expect. I figured they’d both be replicas? Why would he be the leftover ashes if he’s the original?

I had figured that yeah

Okay I’m leaving it here for tonight because it’s nearly 6am 

WHOA Full character portraits?? that’s new!

JADE!

she’s so THOUGHTFUL

I’VE BEEN REACHED

EXCUSE ME????

THATTABOY!

Well this is manipulative

lov her

TEAR: By the way, Colonel, why did you just stand by and watch while she did that? JADE: Oh no, you got me. I just thought it would be amusing.

Wow this is pretty. Cannot believe how nice this set piece from ages ago looks even now.

ah Lorelai is circular, sick

SHE CHANGED HER BEHAVIOR AFTER HER APOLOGY!!!! SHE! IS SO GOOD! I didn’t even think she needed to apologize!!!!

👀👀WAIT IS LUKE CREATING A HYPERRESONANCE WITH LORELAI????????????????? (Don’t answer this pls, but it is my going theory)

weird cameo but ok

Oh. I had a theory that that one of the god generals Guy unmasked was Natalie, but it doesn’t look like the case.

LUKE LINE: well then YOU marry her then! TEAR: Maybe I will LUKE: whatever.

I love his matter-of-fact delivery. It doesn’t at all sound like a come-on

Luke in big, “this is your problem” voice.

Love him

I love her 😂

WHOA THIS CITY IS SICK

HAPPY GNOMEDAY, CHRISTINE

CAN’T HAVE YOU CRYING ON GNOMEDAY

Gnome is sick?? Perhaps /I/ will cry on Gnomeday! (this is a different universe though? I just googled? But that doesn’t mean it’s not the same Gnome!)

Oh okay so the game DOES want me to think this. Now, my thing is: is this truly how it is? Because of the experiments and the way fon mimicry (idr the name) works and Jade saying it’s impossible, Luke MIGHT have been made into an empty vessel to contain Lorelai’s fon resonance? That’s where I am. There’s a lot of implications of this but mostly I’m at:  - Van knows that Luke’s a Seventh Fonon user because he told him not to clash with Tear and has not been at all surprised and he controls the god generals AND when faced with Luke manifesting Lorelai’s power (I assume that’s still Lorelai) he took the time to manipulate him into being pliable  - Do Luke’s parents know?? I don’t think his mom does. His dad might. 

Okay! So! Starting on the Tartarus!

I’m SO suspicious of this, “I lost my memory before I was seven because of this kidnapping” thing I am NOT cool with how many secrets Luke’s house is hiding from him. I am SNIFFING OUT these mysteries!

God I love sick titles!!!

God.

I feel for Luke and like I’m pretty sure he’s purposely kept ignorant, but this IS a sick burn.

GUNS???? I... I mean I know we have cannons in Symphonia I guess but fuckin DUAL PISTOLS!!!

Oh!!!!! This raises many questions!!! suggests many things hidden from luke!! however!!! cool! hello!

Oof Luke’s no-killing getting in the way. I really love this though. Especially from Johnny Yong Bosch’s support role after he played Vash, who also confronts his no-killing thing a lot but like I don’t know how successfully that goes? Whereas I trust tales.

Wow never gonna forgive the joker for stealing Jade’s line

Oh!

This is so thoughtful wow 

TRULY I LOVE COOL FUCCKIN NAAMESS

WAIT THEY’RE VAN’S SUBORDINATES???? I knew he wasn’t on the up and up but what the fuck mate!!

no comment

wait WHAT is it... missable??? 

guy is really good at handling luke. Which is like. I think that’s his literal responsibility judging by the secondhand view on conversations I’ve seen. 

oh....I thought this was going to be a misunderstanding

👀👀👀 forbidden hymnal magic????? (actually I think it’s just quite difficult but S T I L L)

oh my GOD ION 😂no chill roasting your friend in front of her crush, mate

I do not trust this man. 

okay I really like Tear 

I love her expression here 😭

PLOT!! PLOT THICKENING AGENT!!! MEMORY IN THE ROUX MORGUE!

rip. 

this is so fucking funny

RIP to Jade who died in the first Sword Dancer fight 😔it was too hard lmao I was not doing it again. But!!! I finished the Choral Castle!! Wow okay!!! I REALLY want to know what the FUCK was going on there.

Choral Castle is CLEARLY some kind of brain programming place. The way they said, “I used Choral Castle” made it sound like its whole existence is predicated on that machine, whose powers seem based around memory. They talked about “wiping the data” as in Luke has something in him that’s too powerful (i.e. the voice in his head?). Likewise, Guy is missing one (1) memory that made him incredibly averse to women touching him (which is a lot). And finally they talked about Fon seals on Luke? Fon slots? Which sounds like he underwent some horrifically heinous procedures.

NO MOURNERS

Matthias and Nina...? What are we doing here? I mean I missed them don’t get me wrong I’m just confused. We’re not doing this to kill him are we....????

Oh they’re impossibly cute I looove them. Oh they’re so sweet. 

“I will keep you warm” 🥺🥺🥺

“Is there meat in this?” He’s so confusedddd I love him

Ohhhhhhhhh gosh. Oh gosh oh gosh oh gosh. Nina. Oh NINA. NINA MY LOVE. (Wow she’s beautiful she’s so beautiful)

LOOK AT HER

“You’re already at war with Fjerda, heartrender. You want a new one with my country?” Is. Excellent.

Well, I don’t know why we went down that road but I loved it. Is it just so they continue their storyline in a hopeful next season? I do love that.

GOD EVERY TIME KAZ FIGURES SOMEONE OUT. HE HAS LIKE A +4 modifier I LOVE HIM

“If he isn’t with Kirigan’s crew he’s with ours.” YESSSS 

Alina honey it’s weird that you still believed him about it

“They have the advantage.” “Only because I’m not in the game.” I. LOVE. HIM.

Wow, Zoya overcame her racism upon realizing that the man willing to kill hundreds of people was a bigger threat 

YES JESPER YES INEJ MAKE HIM FUCKING BLEED, MY LOVES, MY DARLINGS

Oh he’s doing that bullshit again. 

“It will take more than this.” INEJ, with dozens more knives: Granted.

Hannibal’s back!!! Mads, we need you!!! help us do a murder

Hannibal, entering as a vision: Alina, use the knife ME: 😭😭 OMG IT IS HIM

OH SHE CUT IT OUT OF HIM!!!!!! YOOOOO DOPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BLAST HIS ASS

Oh heartrender. Bullshit. 

“How dare you” MOTHERFUCKER HOW DARE YOU!!! Get your powers off of Jesper!

HAHAHAHA oh my god. Nicely done, Mal.

WOW LOL Truly, why would they care anything for you but hatred, my guy. 

“I’ve never met a saint before.” 😭😭😭omg she said it. It’s one of her saints in the books and she SAId the line that makes sense.

OMG OMG NAME IT SANKTA ALINE YES 

THE DEAL IS THE DEAL THE DEAL IS THE DEAAAAAALLLLLLLLL YESSSS

Also, I love that she managed to get through to him. Kaz wouldn’t have accepted a gift, but a deal? Oh yeah.

Oh we BASICALLY started Crows!!! If there’s three seasons for the 3 Aline books, then the duology fits neatly into those remaining two seasons. wait are there four books....no three, right?

“But she is a saint.” He loves Inej so much. 

“Ghost” means “SURVIVORS”? Ohhhhh oh ho ho ho hhoooooooooooo YES

Oh an ARMY. WOW

Wow that was like nine decapitations? Nice, man. sorry about your friend. Temporary ceasefire because this is backstory just to say that was a solid move.

caring abt the darkling’s backstory call that... ludanarrative dissonance

damn am I about to root for the darkling again. End this backstory it’s affecting me. I love one person standing against impossible odds. 

Interesting. 

OUCH INEJ

omg Jesper. 

I... that’s not how I thought this would go? I don’t understand. I.... why would this be how it goes?...he gets the stag?

I can’t believe they got Kaz Brekker’s, “I just think crows are neat” speech into this show. Wow. I love this show.

“You won’t.” Wow. Way to make those the two most romantic words in the english language, Leigh. 

wow I hate this. Darkling you’re the worst, man. 

“Jes” 🥰

I truly don’t want to watch more of her story unless it’s fixing this I hate that she doesn’t have access to her powers. I hate it a lot.

“I am his soldier.” Wow.

“Alina has strong feelings for you. And I took her power, so... um. Do you want to kiss?”

No she’s right, you look _fine_

BULLET GOAT BULLET GOAT BULLET GOAT 

That’s... that’s no....that didn’t work did it??? OMG?? I TRULY thought he was just going to save it, steal a gun and wait for an opportune “one shot” moment. 

“You are special.” 🙄

Wow a fortuitous meeting with foreign diplomats call that foreigndipity

“Fine. Make me your villain.” Also an okay line! Alas, in his shitty mouth.

“I thought you looked older.” a man who did not want to be flirted with lmao rude ass

too bad he didn’t have a tack in his shoe he couldn’t Alina polygraph cheat the heartrender

BURN THE LOCK! CLEVER!

I was pretty sure that was Matthais but I didn’t pay close attention to casting

THIS EPISODE IS CALLED THE HEART IS AN ARROW!

Wow this is so harrowing. 

Wow Jessie Mei Li is so pretty

OH this is why Zoya is mad, yeah got it. I mean I also think she’s racist, but.

OH YEAH SHE CAN USE THAT POWER TO ATTACK HUH. 

MAL! OMG???? Wow. Tracked the hell out of her, bud.

Me, blushing: Oh Nina is SO hot

NINA, blushing: oh no he’s hot

me: YEAH BUD

ah, the third man who has been so upset to be near a woman who thinks he’s hot

“Would you stop your wiggling” I love this fic. (I know it’s canon but like...)

they’re both so hot. he’s not technically my type but it’s more of a guideline than a rule

I would write fic but I don’t know if the actors ages are their canonical ages. In my heart they are but I know the books disagree. 

LOVE that the Kaz loves Inej angle is coming out. This accelerated path is REALLY working for me.

“They taught you how to control it?” The stand in for a dozen emotions playing across his face. “Don’t be scared.” More a plea than a comfort.

Oops! I’m in love with them both!

[huge explosion] JESPER: Our alarm

I love them

“That barrel rat killed my brother. I will reduce her to ash.” Is a good line but it’s about my love, so.....Also thanks for saying barrel rat and not a slur

NICE SHOT. WOW THE DOUBLE RICOCHET INTO THE SAME EXACT SPOT

WOW That steam hit was clever. These are some good fights

OH I FORGOT JESPER HAD MAGIC I FORGOT I FORGOT I FORGOT I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. Fabrikator? Is he a fabrikator? Jesper 😭my love

Imagine chasing Kaz Brekker. I would sooner chase a bear. 

...scratch what I said about the slur thing

Inej I’m sorry you had to do that honey, but you were rig- OH MY GOD THAT’S TH EFUCKING DARKLING

KAZ VS DARKLING I DIDN’T THINK THAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN 

DID HE BREAK THE DARKBLADE WITH A FUCKING FLASHBANG? KAZ FUCKING BREKKER, EVERYBODY!!!! 

Wow sucks to suck huh Krigane. Aleksander? I’m not misnaming him on purpose it’s the only one I think I can spell.

WOW THAT WENT FROM THEY’RE SO CUTE TO OH THAT’S A BIG HOLE SO FAST

Is that a version of shadow and bone?

Yeah. I don’t know why I spotted that I just glanced at it and was like: that’s the motif of the cover I’ve seen once in my life and two big words... is it Shadow and Bone in the book’s language?

is...durast a type of power....or was that a racist statement

Love you Kaz

“So you set him on fire” oh my god

I like this fabrikator. I mean I probably shouldn’t this early but I love when people make stuff 😭

WAIT I FORGOT WHY THE CROWS ARE HERE I KNEW THEY WERE AT THE PALACE IT JUST DIDN’T CLICK FOR ME

“No human being should ever be as proud as you are right now.” I love them both I love them both.

“It’s like butter week.” Alina, that’s the most charming thing you’ve ever said I love you now.

AHHHH JESPER IS RIGHT THERE. WOW I PICKED A BAD TIME TO FALL FOR ALINA.

“None, in fact.” NO ALINA TELL HIM ABOUT BUTTER WEEK! ALINA!

YES JESPER. I mean... probably no Jesper, but also yes

“She’s Suli” Zoya do you just enter scenes to be racist, dude?

“Is it my size?” “You have to ask?” Kaz....

Yesss a tailor and a fabrikator, a match made in heaven get it.

HI INEJ YOU LOOK INCREDIBLE IN YOUR UNIFORM

god I was like: come on burst into applause

and instead they crossed themselves, which. is far better honestly 

ALINA: [summons the sun] Me, looking at Inej: she sure did!!!

Awww Jesper I’m glad you had a good time, bud. I know, I know, this is terrible for the mission but look how happy they are!! You deserve it. I hope no one dies.

Love to see someone pick a magical lock :hum:

Oh Mal. 

uhhhh???????? why is this religious advisor here???????????????????????

It’s silly that standing close to each other is an intimidation tactic I can only read it as sexual tension. Me: why do you want to kiss Mal? I mean, he’s cute but that’s weird for yo- ohhh.

“We cannot let him obtain that kind of power.” Yeah I thought it was weird that he dresses like a villain. 

“Listen to me,” she says, as if her next words will include instructions on killing the Batman.

“I don’t want to die with the wrong face on” oh HONEY OH GOODNESS. AH. 

...HEY WAS THAT THE FUCKING CONDUCTOR? DID THAT FUCKIN GUY JUST TRY TO KILL ALINA? No??? that doesn’t make sense???? General Zlakov? you don’t k- OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WHEN HE WAS MEETING WITH HIM AT THE SAMUEL SEABURY MOMENT. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

KAZ BREKKER I LOVE YOU SO MUCH GOD FUCKING DAMN YOU KNEW IN AN INSTANT WHAT A FUN TWIST. OCEAN’S 11 HEIST

oOOOOH good EYE whoever that was across the balcony!!!

.....Kirigan you fuckin suck, man. WAIT IS HE GONNA KILL MAL. OH OH OH WOW WOW WOW INTRIGUE TAKE HIM TO THE LADY YES GOOD YOU DID IT 

Wow, great reactions, Mal. You are real good at surviving, my guy. Hey what kind of Grisha is- OH SHE’S A FABRIKATOR???OH MY GOD HE FUCKIN SMACKED HER WITH THAT BAR. Wow. This shit popping off.

Alina, I love you and I understand this is all very exciting and look I’m not here to harsh your vibe, you saw me congratulating Jesper on his nice time having sex, but buddy please stop kissing this man literally anyone else would be better-....no except the Conductor, also do not kiss him. Your tailor! Mal! Those girls you hang out with! Jespe- wait is Jesper gay or bisexual? he’s gay isn’t he. Anyway, leave this man alone please.

THEY KISSED AGAIN. LOOK BUDDY I am HAPPY you’re having fun but not the time. 

Also can you even attack with your light balls? Like, they’re good! It’s important! I haven’t seen you do one offensive magic. Well... that general is offended by your magic, but. OKAY GOOD YES BHAGRA TELL HER. “Did he want you dependent on him and his fabrikator’s tricky little gloves.” Ohhhhhhhhh that’s devious as HELL WOW CLEVER FUCKIN TRICK. 

“He IS the Black Heretic” WHAT???????

SHE’S HIS FUCKING MOM? SHE’S HIS MOM??????? HE LETS HER LIVE????? HE LETS HER LIVE HIS MOM???? SHE’S RIGHT THERE????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

this is why her hut is so dark huh.

....the volcra were people. I didn’t even think about what they were I haven’t had time. 

honey I’m sorry you kissed that bad man I know he’s hot but I’m sorry

omg Kaz is still being chased by this guy lmao 

“You’re like a wounded spider in my house.” That’s Kaz Brekker, my guy. You’re millimeters away from death.

HAHA KAZ FUCKING BREKKER! Ah damn bad bet.

INEJ my beloved I am so sorry. Immaculate throw. Inej you’re so hot. 

Inej honey I’m so sorry. She left her saint 😦

oh wow he’s gonna be so mad. OH SHE GOT TO THE STABLES. ALINA. 

can she do the sun blade yet? I assume that’s what the thread of “the dark blade is only for emergencies” leads to

Oh he knows she’s his mom. Why does he let her live???? Oh, he thinks he’s smarter than her. Yeah that scans. Wait how old is she?

“I’d wager you’d need a skilled tracker to find her now.” HAHA what a fucking gloat.

....Jesper.............JESPER DID YOU JUST LUCK OUT HAHA OH MY GOD. Wow. The two thirstiest characters just lucking out together. Thirst solidarity. Brings a tear to my eye. I’m not here to advocate for getting laid over supporting your chums, but.... 🤷‍♀️it’s what the saints supported, apparently!

wait his first name isn’t Kirigan? Kirigan Jones

Jesper and Inej my loves 

Time for a heist.

“A bullet to remember me.”

Amazing.

LOVE Kaz’s little phosphorous package at the bottom of that guy’s shoe. Amazing.

WOW THAT COPY.

OH MY GOD HER SHADOWING

ALONG WITH THE CLOCK CHIME I LOVE HIMMMMMMMMMM. Jesper Fahey, better gunslinger than anyone in The Dark Tower (2017)

KAZ: Acrobat... a crow bat... CROWS

Mood of the day.

OMG you greased the ribbon, my guy????

Inej: here’s 1/5 of my knives, symbolically 

Amita Suman is SO GORGEOUS. SO IS KIT YOUNG. GOD THESE PEOPLE.

JESPER THAT SHOT WAS TERRIFYING I LOVE YOU BUT GODDAMN 

Kaz could’ve showed some talents!! He’s so good with his hands!!!!

Oh my god Alina did the thumbtack in the shoe to beat the polygraph trick????

“They’re due to stand trial” my guy if you think those trials are anything but, “are you grisha? okay goodbye”

soldier why was your weapon empty???????

“Is that all of them?” No, you got bolo’d there’s one more at least.

Ouch Mal took that round to center mass?? Why did they bring a fucking gatling gun?????

oh my GOD “You’re the quartermaster, aren’t you?” [Glass Him] like... mood, but we’re not supposed to do it my guy you’re in the military??? As far as the military is concerned that’s unprovoked? 

This tailor scene is where I left off, so from here on I’m flying without a plan. Simply cruising. 

It’s honestly a little terrifying to see a tailor work. 

NINA ZENIK. [shot through the heart begins to play]

swedish accent: druskella

A goat is that a sacrifice???? milk?????

Kaz “I’ll Get The Goat” Brekker. This is actually why they call him dirtyhands he just fuckin loves animals.(I know 😂)

Jesper my love

Imagine if they made a big deal of hiring Jessie Mei Li then they just tailor her into a different actress.

“It’s not magic, it’s science.” Listen, Kirigan I’ve read the Magicians if you don’t have to observe the tides and moon cycles and get your fingers in the immaculate angles, my guy. Also I fully thought he was the king until the second episode lmao

kirigin: she will change the future starting now [kills everyone]

omg could you have taught her for FIVE SECONDS at least my guy????

oh she did it. Omg the king is a sunbeam huh. Stare Into The Sun.

Wow I love the little uhhhhhh... plasma licks across the effect. Like the actual sun. I don’t know what those are called. They’re like bands of something or other. 

I want Kirigan’s coat. Or... if I was making a coat I’d do a little differently but the tailoring is immaculate. 

Alina just like: Oh 🥰 touch!!!

which, mood.

WOW Zoya!!!

KAT AND THE GOAT

KAZ’s samuel seabury moment. 

Knowing about Kaz’s brother and that hope got him into that whole scam by Pekka Rollins really changes the tone of the scene with Inej at the monument. 

For a moment I thought the goat was gonna be their landmine detector and was like: Nooooooooo

of course I don’t trust what- OMG THE FOLD IS WAY WORSE AT NIGHT 

THE LANDMINES WERE FUCKING REAL???? SIR!!!!!!! 

Wow Alina’s coat is rad. I mean it’s a little garish, but I think it suits her dark hair. 

Alina, buddy you’ve gotta have more chill than that 😂

Oh sick, Mortal Kombat

Alina, I don’t think you’re supposed to sucker punch them

Oh, well I guess it came back. Hey that stag. I love that Hannibal keeps guesting on this show.

I don’t get why Zoya hates her? Because she couldn’t sleep with Mal? Like?

Is that guy in the background with the big hat just like... following her around as her bodyguard? Just, “look if someone touches you, I shoot except in the training grounds”?

Oh she went into the Jedi Cave. She’s gonna see Evil Alina.

“What about now?” She just hits her with a tiny hammer. I 😂

how...how do the crows get hrough this??? also did they just leave nina?

“You’ll be happy with the meal if I survive.”

How many Grisha are there??? Is it hundreds? Two hundred most?

JESPER IS STILL HOLDING THE GOAT WOW I LOVE HIM

Kaz has the best fucking horrified expressions

HEY THEY MADE IT!!!!

Wow I hate Pekka Rollins the show version already, that was quick.

“Did he remember you?” Jesper knows! I don’t remember if that was true in the books but I love him. Christine, I love him.

This fuckin WILD LOOK in his eye

love that Kaz just has a 1950s mobster just hanging around. 

🥰 all her knives I love her.

that name’s just like “Pekka Rollins” 

aw it’s not. OH LMAO Is he the Conductor? 

“Oh, why me 😩”

OH MY GOD SHE DID THE VANISH I LOVE HER SO MUCH 

“It’s what I would do” love you Kaz

“Handsome decoy also not a Jesper talent” I’m not so sure, buddy

Love you Jesper and your quickdraw

“Dirtyhands” 🥰

The RELIEF on KAz’s face.

Remember when I said Jack Rackham has a daggerblade cadence? Kaz Brekker is the same.

Mal’s friends are good

🥰 The Club. Love you, Kaz.

Alrighty let’s get a few of these down before I sleep.

“We’re not in Ketterdam!” SMASH CUT TO THE CROWS

NOW IS OUR SMASH CUT YES OKAY YES I’M HERE MY DEARS

MY BOY MY BOY THAT’S MY BOY!

yesssss this is so funnnnn

MY OTHER BOY. His face has so many angles :hum: exactly right look at all those sharp angles he is a dagger in a suit. It’s been too long, WHERE IS MY GIRL? WHEN INEJ ISN’T ON SCREEN EVERYBODY SHOULD BE ASKING WHERE’S INEJ. To be fair she’s probably here I just can’t see her. 

HEre?? Here??? inej here???? secret space? In a corner? Inej?YES THERE WE ARE YES SECRET PLACE YES THE WINDOW GOOD. I’m talking like an Igor.

HELLO MY LOVE!

Wow she’s so pretty. 

one million kruge

🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

Oh is this our plot?

God she moves so quietly. Just like another shadow. Yesssss Inej my spider, my love. 

Pekka! We LOVe names we know. 

“We’ll need a miracle or two.” 🥰

GOD the shaking out the leads montage I love this I love them I’m so HAPPY

That boxer’s like: fast, reliable, cheap, pick two. 

Wow they efficiently kneed that guy, huh. 

Are we gonna see Nina?

wow. A single man emerging from the fold is so much.

HAHA LOVE THAT SHOT OF KAZ

“One of these has a hole in it.”

Jesper’s little Sokka face lmao

sunmoner

This is what we’re watching right that’s what it’s called?

“No Fly Zone” 😔sorry, sam, the episode is over.

They just literally let him through???

SHARON! Sharon in Mission Impossible Gear!!! Wow. I agree, take everything from Tom Cruise.Leave him nothing. 

Green Goblin Bomb

YESSSSSS THAT SUIT MY MANNNNNNNNNN YES

“I’m Captain America” YES MY MAAAAAAAAAN

wow Karli got Bucky talking that’s half the battle. You should see this therapy sessions, Karli. 

I forgot to ask who this man fighting Sam is... too late I guess. I’ll find out later. 

For a brief moment I thought Karli was gonna Dora Milaje stolen tech Bucky’s arm off with her phone

I’m sure that’s a tracker, but I think it would be funny if she reverse pickpocketed a grenade into his - OH MY GOD???? SHE FUCKING DID OH MY GOD I WAS JOKING SHARON!!!

Me, knowing full well Redwing is about to scan everyone: Redwing is going to ask politely if anyone can fly???

wow they really just can’t reconcile Karli with the story they have to tell huh.... 

WOW SHIELD DOME WITH THE WINGS AND A VIBRANIUM ALLOY CAP! YES! THat WOULD work in fiction if it hit the shield first!!!! WOW!

Wow that was a wild move, Bucky, don’t know if it was effective but it sure happened

oh fuck I forgot about walker. lmao she kicked his little baby shield out of the air, get good, son.

Oh those little spider things were just locks? I thought they were bombs.

Is walker just hypnotizing himself with his “I’m a big boy” medal????

bucky why did you save him. 

ouch sam. Oh no your wings got wet! Wait. not those kind of wings you’re fine. 

Wow nice save, Ayla!

Nice kick, Karli! look I knew she was going to kill these people, but that’s a Disney problem. Walker is a plot problem. Come on don’t give him a hero moment.... God damn it. Oh good!!! They were saved by- Oh I thought it was one of the flagsmashers. 

AW that smile, Bucky. 

why is walker in your crew. (sorry I’m so mad lmao)

SHARON CARTER!!!!!!! SHARON CARTER THE SHADOWBROKER. Oh wait literally the powerbroker lmao. I forgot.

Sharon shoots him right. Oh and she got shot yeah Karli had terrible trigger discipline. 

God shat shield. 

BRACING WINGS BRACING WINGS BRACING WINGS THAT’S DOPE AS HELL

That shield would’ve absorbed that pipe impact.

SAM GOOD YES.

Don’t touch bucky. 

Yeah, it’s about who you are without the shield that gives you the right to hold it. You don’t need it. Convince her. 

Wow, Sharon. Sharon is the Disney Corporate surrogate.

“Don’t you fret/Dear Eponine/You won’t feel any pain”

Oh Sam is so upset. Sam, I’m sorry Disney did this to you, man.

I was pretty sure Sharon was gonna have a heelturn I just didn’t think it was gonna be so bloody. But it wouldn’t make sense for a big portion of the audience if she wasn’t actually there in the game I guess instead of like a call at the end. 

“Or is it just more people like you?” Is a good line. 

I REALLY want Sam to say, “Because 2.0 will be me if you don’t fucking listen.” Like it wouldn’t... politically, on a grand scale, be the best narrative move. Because it’s like y’know great person stuff, but still. Teeth. Show me your teeth.

Oh Australian guy. 

Who was that??

what the fuck man. THIS IS SO WEIRD WHY IS HE SO HAPPY. Oh he doesn’t know she’s evil??????? oh because everyone he reports to is just like that ha okay, yeah nevermind no more qualms.

AH SHIT AH NO AH FORGOT ABOUT THIS BUCKY

“here’s my sorry book in this bath and body works bag. sorry for breaking into your office, I was raised by the Dora Milaje.” I guess fostered. He was raised by- Oh Isaiah time.

Isaiah give him some hell, push him. He needs to report to the People. 

“Now they’ll never forget what you did for this country.” I’ve got a lot to say about that. Don’t really feel like it right now tho.

Aww party Bucky

WAIT I just remembered Sam’s wings are Wakandan those are vibranium WINGS TOO. Shit. Wow. Also that makes them literally priceless. You could name a price to sell those for and it wouldn’t be enough. 

Well, Sharon. Am I rooting for Sharon....? No, right? No, my flag smashers rooting doesn’t carry over. Mostly because of y’know... how that ended. 

“I’m not like you.” 🙄

Truly I think it’s wild that Sam is trying to talk to him. I mean on one hand I get it, but on the other, that blood on the shield shot.

GOD ALL OF SAM’S MOVES ARE SO FUCKING COOL

Wow that “I am Captain America” shot is just. What you think should happen when you look at Captain America usually and then it somehow works because there’s usually grace and charm. 

God, Sam getting the shield ready for that shield bash was like a fraction of Steve with Mjolnir. (My Brain: Worthy.)

GOD. Bucky’s, “Do Not Fuck This Up Again” look. I like, I’m with you 100% that they need to interrogate the, “Was Steve infallible?” question because they need to realize the answer is no, but I also just respect, “This was fucking YOURS” y’know? Like, whether or not Steve is infallible isn’t germane to the question of, “Do you keep something someone gives you in their will?” y’know? Like I know, I know a lot of people are like, “Oh, no I’m just giving it to you. What you do with it up to you. Sell it for scrap if you want.” But I feel like no one HOPES you do that.

unrelated, ripping Sam’s wings off is a real... fighting an angel move. I don’t think that’s important, but I just thought about it.

Ohhh SHIT I didn’t... expect consequences. Yeah, the optics ARE terrible but I didn’t expect they would care! Wow!

“On all platforms” Sam, her twitter followers, her insta followers? Through the roof. 

thing walker could’ve shouted that’d make me laugh begrudgingly: you think these wings make you strong? Man, these things? They’re a rip off

“Well, I’m a bizarrely wise man, Sam.” Kiss!!!

“Keep ‘em” OHHHH 😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮😮

I don’t care about this trial scene. Like, nothing about this is justice for anyone and even though I hate this man I can’t ignore the circumstances that created him, of which this board of officials no doubtedly had so much to do with. lmk if there’s something I should know abt it.

Worst Case Scenario: Walker becomes an anti-american villain that says all the right things but is Evil Now

Julia Louis-Dreyfus?????????????? Uh.Hello! Weird to see you here!

oh ew 😩

That’s his wife? 

...She’s like EXTRA government. I guess... (Extra-Judicial anyway, ayyy) 

Okay, I feel like Bucky is less threatening with a gun somehow. 

Bucky’s Therapist: I want you to dry fire only, okay?  Bucky: is that good? Therapist: no it’s terrible for the firing mechanism

Wait is Sam trying to give Isaiah the shield???

“What went wrong?” Oh Sam, honey... buddy...

“That white man’s shield.” Fuck. T...fuck? 

“No self-respecting Black man would ever wanna be.” That’s a HARD fucking stance for him to take. I’m torn between, “wow I didn’t think they’d spell that out” and “you’re treating Black people as a monolith.” But all I want. ALL I want is for Sam to interrogate what it fucking means for him to be Captain America. I DESPERATELY need him to do the work. Sam, I love you, but use this.

Ohhh this is working on me ohhh I am crying as he’s getting his community together.

OH NEW WINGS? 

“I’m right handed.” HAHA god

 😭😭LONELY BUCKY BEING FRIENDLY!!!

“How do I kill people with this knife” Barnes

he’s just straight up drinking a Heinekin? How much did they pay...?

fuck Lamar’s parents are getting to me. Can you fucking IMAGINE that man looking up to THIS MAN. Ah my heart. Jerry Seinfeld is gonna pick him up in a fancy car to get coffee and take him to Julia Louis-Dreyfus now.

Sharon!...Sharon why do you have more plot.  OMG the kids playing with Cap’s shield is... 

LOOK AT HIM LOOK AT HIM THIS IS A, “My husband did some good, didn’t he?” smile Oh WOW I’m crying! Can you imagine? That’s. “In their eyes I see you, Alexander/I see you every time” Ouch 

Honestly, Christine. I really didn’t think they’d go through this much trouble to make Sam getting the shield matter this much when Steve handed it over at the end of Endgame. I’m... I thought, “Oh, they’re just going to gloss over a Black man getting the shield probably” and like I’m not saying this is a great job or that I think they’ll land it, but I am happy I wasn’t all the way right.

“You weren’t amending, you were avenging.” Is really astute, Sam. That’s that PTSD group therapy strength. 

“A couple of guys with a mutual friend.” CUTE. KISS. 

Look how fucking TALL he’s WALKING WITH THAT SHIELD. BE SOMETHING, SAM. God, I’m invested.

Sam. Be worthy. You’re so close. Please make this count.

The only way this works is for Sam to synthesize his own Justice. 

omg Imagine if in the box there weren’t falcon wings there was just like grenades or something. 

SHOW ME THE WINGS. DON’T END THIS EPISODE WITHOUT SHOWING ME 

GOD DAMN YOU

post credits!

I FORGOT THIS WAS OUT TODAY LMAO

“There has never been another Steve Rogers, has there?” pointed rhetoric, n*zi

It’s not that Zemo’s coat isn’t cool with that fur lined collar, it’s that knowing he’s evil is just like, “people are going to spot you a mile away, man.”

“She’s no different than him” 😩

“If anything that shield should be destroyed” I mean..... at this point???? yeah? 

quit giving fake captain america screentime unless he’s just gonna like fall off a cliff and leave the shield behind as loot or some other fun gag

“You’ve got ten minutes or we’re doing things my way” Wow I just hate him. 

Me: Why is Karli giving a speech she’s already right Me: oh, the audience isn’t supposed to feel that way 

Love that Bucky is manning the door. I like to think he’ll just throw him through a window if he tries to leave. 

“Do you really want his blood on your hands?” ME: Bucky, Bucky, say “No, I want yours” 

This is a REALLY GOOD opportunity to show Sam is the actual best candidate for Cap, but the kind that can’t mainstream into the govt position. Also this would be a great excuse to pull an Amos and Naomi style Bucky needing conscience guidance from Sam situation. I’m paused typing this because I’m just savoring the possibility knowing the likelihood is small. 

That shield is fifteen pounds. Zemo would be dead at a shot hard enough to ricochet off his fuckin head. Also fucking FAKE CAP. 

Also js Karli could’ve thrown the table she was hiding behind at Zemo. But it would’ve momentarily taken the aspect of a shield... I wonder...if they were like, “we can’t let her have what looks like a shield” 

“And then we kill Captain America” yea mood

“Sam, you can’t hold out hope for Karli” sorry did someone ask you for advice, man

“All you’re running in here is your mouth.” Love u Sam

“Pointy sticks” idc if he meant it like that I’m taking that as a racist remark. drag this man around the walls of troy.

😔if Sam hadn’t asked Bucky to stop them I would’ve just accepted that man’s death

god I fucking LOVE the Dora Milaje

godddd his arm IS SO FUCKING RAD. also that must hurt like shit to put it back 

“They weren’t even super soldiers.” Awww white man tears!! Colonizer gonna cry? Mr. Jurisdiction?? also they WERE super soldiers they just didn’t need to alter their blood. Either of the hawkeyes could take you no problem. 

“My world doesn’t matter to America, so why should I care about its mascot?” THAT’S IT THAT’S THE FUCKING COMMENTARY I’VE BEEN DESPERATE FOR!!! I know, I know the show doesn’t really support it right now, but god damn it SOMEONE had to fucking SAY IT. 

Love that Sam walked upstairs instead of flying. I’m guessing it’s to delineate between combat mode and combat-ready.

OMG The Rheairds are my fast travel? 😍

Omg

Wow I love this guy!

omgggg 😭😭😭

Wow I beat the dragon! I honestly just got way stronger with lloyd 😬who knows if anyone else is good at stuff. 

GNOME 😭

SHE’S RIGHT

I’m so excited to play more I feel like I’m getting close to the end. I mean I know I’m probably like what halfway through? I just got the Earth summon? But! I’m still excited I feel like I’ve made a lot of progress in the last few days and I’m really looking forward to seeing how all of this wraps up.

I feel like there are still like a big amount of secrets? Colette keeps hiding something about her body, Kratos is clearly trying to be a double agent at some point, I’m totally unclear on whether severing these connections will actually help ALSO no one has made ANY connections about how Sheena’s getting these summon spirits from both lands and clearly Mithos got them from both? I feel like it’s cutting the ties Mithos made and MIthos might be like an angel? Which would mean he did it for nefarious reasons but I don’t understand how he did this exact thing we’re doing but to fasten the worlds rather than unfasten them?

Also, has no one tried to claim the summon spirits since Mithos? Because Sheena made it seem like “oh this is a big deal for my village” not “this is a historical event, me trying to summon a spirit” which is interesting because like. 1) Volt killed half her village for trying to summon it and not being able to speak to it and 2) why did her village need her to perform such desperate measures when Tethealla was in incline?